1736

January 1735-36

Saturday, 3.

One David Ferne was brought to Town, born in the Shire of Ross in Scotland, age 26, but 30 Inches high, and 35 round. All his Features human, but his Hands resemble the Feet of a Seal, and his Feet those of a Bear.

Thursday, 15.

His Majesty went to the H. of Lords, and open’d the Session with a most gracious Speech to both Houses.

Saturday, 17.

The Sessions ended at the Old Bailey, where 61 Prisoners were try’d, and 44 were ordered for Transportation, 26 acquitted, and one (viz.) Thomas Balker was capitally convicted.

Thursday, 29.

The Judge’s Report concerning 11 Malefactors, under Sentence of Death, was made to his Majesty in Council, when William Wreathack, the noted Attorney, William Campbell, George Bird, Peter Chamberlain and James Russet, were ordered transported for Life. Mackney, Alder and Refue, for 14 Years. Bulker, Cole and Brace for Execution.

Saturday, 31.

We had scearce any Frost this Winter ;  on the contrary that such continued Rain, that Sheep, Hares and Venison, in some Partes, dy’d rotten ;  and many Lives lost by the Floods. Perhaps it may be attributed to the Dampness of the Season, that the Mushrooms gather’d in the Woods near Boulogne in France were so poisonous, that three Persons who supp’d thereon, dy’d the same Night, and a 4th, who only tast’d them, was seiz’d in a violent manner.

Establishment of the Forces for the Year 1736

	Great Britain.	Minorca.	Gibraltar.	America.
Horse	2071.	—	—	—
Dragoons	1656.	—	—	—
Foot	8708.	2260.	1464.	1699.
				Total 17856.

L I S T  of  D E A T H S

continu’d from December 1735

Dec. 26. Craven Kinnersley, Esq ;  late High Sherriff for Staffordshire, of a Shot to his Thigh from a Gun which the Keeper of his Park having laid down, was discharg’d by a Greyhound running over it. His Thigh was cut off, and his Groom’s Arm, which was shot through by the same Bullet, but he is recover’d.

Jan. 23. Mr Pontifranck, a Farmer, being shot dead, and robb’d of 70 l. going from High Wycombe.

Jan. 26. Mrs Eliz. Hooke formerly a Welch Judge. She was Daughter to the famous Major General Lambert.

Society Transactions

A Report was made at a recent Meeting of an Action against the Gin.

Mr Blackness, having received Intelligence of a Realignment of the distribution of the Products of rival Distillers in Spittalfields and Whitechapel, sought assistance of fellow Members in frustrating such unwelcome Enterprise. With the early practical Support of Mr Darkin and the Favour of Lady de Ville, the Cause was widely espoused amongst Members. The subsequent Interception of a Shipment of Gin led to a fierce Battle along Wentworth Street, between George Yard and Rose Lane. By chance a Fog arose, allowing a Disengagement once the Work was done.

February 1735-36

Wednesday, 4 February 1736.

A Horse, 12 Hands and a half, ran 100 Miles, on Banstead Downs, in 15 Hours.

At Stapleton, in Gloucestershire, a monstrous Calf came from a Cow, the Head as large as a Bull’s, and bigger than its whole Body ;  and the Face strangely deform’d, with one Eye on the Top of the Nose, and the other under it, near the Mouth ;  Ears like a Dog’s, the Tongue short, and in the Throat ;  the haeart in the Cavity of a Swelling above the Shoulders ;  the Navel between the Fore-legs ;  the Tail short like a Deer, but in the Middle of the Back.

Thursday, 5 February 1736.

Burton Brace, Joseph Cole, and Thomas Bulker, were hang’d at Tyburn.

Saturday, 14 February 1736.

A young Lady being sued by a Gentleman in a Court of Equity for refusing to perform a Marriage Promise to him, pleaded she had good Reason to alter her Mind, upon hearing him declare himself no Admirer of Farinelli, and disapprove of Balls, Masquerades, and late Hours ; adding, she doubted not but that the Court would think she had a fortunate Escape.

Farinelli

Monday, 16 February 1736.

A Question was carry’d in the House of Commons for building a Bridge over the Thames, from Palace Yard to the Surrey Side. During the Debate, that River overflow’d its Banks by Reason of a strong Spring Tide and a Storm lasting several Hours, the Water was higher than ever known before, and rose above 2 Foot in Westminster Hall ;  where the Courts being Sitting, the Judges &c. were obliged to be carry’d out. The Water came into the Cellars and Ground Rooms, near the River on both Sides, and Flow’d thro’ the Streets of Wapping and Southwark, as in its proper channel.

Wednesday, 18 February 1736.

Count Phillipe Kinski, Embassador of his Imperial Majesty of Bohemia, gave a grand Entertainment and Ball at Somerset House. Their Majesties and Royal Family were at the Ball, and about 800 Persons of Rank, in Masques, with exceeding rich Dress. So magnificent was the Spectacle that Observers seeking a better View ascended the Rooftops of Somerset House itself, resulting in a tragic Accident in which a one of the common Sort came to his Death, falling from the Heights to the crowded Courtyard. By good Fortune no Person of Rank was struck, nor other than briefly incommoded.

Somerset House

Thursday, 19 February, 1736.

The Prince of Wales, from attending Count Kinski’s Ball, came home to a real Fire in his Residence at Leicester House. Through taking personal control at the very Front of fighting the Blaze, threatening to engulph the entire Building, he Single Handedly saved all but a single Chamber gutted and another much besmoak’d.

Frederick, Prince of Wales

Saturday, 21 February, 1736.

The Lamb, Capt Morgan, was cast away in Bristol Channel, and 76 Persons were lost, most of them Soldiers of Col. Hardgrave’s Regiment, returning to Ireland, anong them Capt Frankford and Capt Williamson. But 40 were saved by getting up the Shrouds.

Saturday, 28 February, 1736.

About the Middle of this Month we had hard Frosts, and frequent Snow, for about a Fortnight : They had a great deal more in Scotland, where several Persons were lost in the Snow : And in North Wales very old Men could not remember it so deep before.

Several Proposals were laid before the House of Commons for building a Bridge at Westminster ;  the Fund, for which, to be raised by Way of Lottery : Also for laying such a Duty on distill’d spiritous Liquor, as may prevent the ill Consequences of the poorer Sort drinking of them to Excess. We have observed some Signs, where such Liquors are retailed, with the following Inscriptions, Drunk for a Penny, dead drunk for Two-pence, clean Straw for nothing. One of the Plans for building a Bridge, proposes the making of a fine Road to it, and raising Wharfs and Keys from Scotland-Yard to to New Palace Yard, out of the Shore of the Thames, which, making it narrower, will quicken the Current, and thereby cleanse the Bottom, and make the River deeper and more navigable.

Society Transactions

Mr Darkin reports that his investigation of Matters arising from the unseasonal Lightning at the End of June last Year have taken his Companions from the Depths of Shadwell, though Mr Byron’s recruitment of the passionate Interest of Lady de Ville at Count Kinski’s Masquerade, to some of the highest Stations in the Land. More he declined to reveal in advance of firm Evidence.

From Letters to the Royal Society, February 1736.

Sirs,

I was most pleased that you found my recent Discourse and Demonstration of the Effects of stored Electrikal Fluid on Animals. I have been asked to clarify some Points by learn’d Members and I shall do so here.

Firstly, the Frogs that I used were normal Frogs and I believe that, with further Experimentation, this Effect will also be repeated in higher Forms of Animal such as the Dog. The Apparatus used was some of my own making, but was essentially similar to that shown by Mr Gray a few months earlier. My Devices improve on his by an Order of Magnitude in their Ability to transfer both Resinous and Vitreous Electricity.

Secondly, there is no Way presently to control the Amount of Movement given by the stimulation of the Frog’s Nervous Systems. The jerking seen in the Demonstration merely proves the Ability to control the Limb, or indeed any Function requiring Muscular Action. I am currently working on refining the Electrical Fluid Flow such that I shall soon be able to produce smooth Movements in both Flexion and Extension of the said Frog’s Legs.

If it pleases the Society, I shall shortly have ready for Demonstration a Discharge Rod which I have tested recently on an unruly Ruffian that did assault my Personage in St James’s Park of recent. The Discharge Rod was merely a scaled up Version of the Probes which I used upon the Frogs’ Nervous Tissues.

The Effects on Humans is modified, I am certain, by the Ability of the Soul to deflect the said Fluids across the Body. Yet the Subject of the (rather uncontrolled) Experiment did produce both a convulsing and a darkening or burning, both of which can be readily reproduced in the Frog with the largest of Electrical Fluid Injections.

To this End I will shortly be looking for a Source of Human Volunteers that will enable me to determine if my Theories are indeed Correct, and that should help identify the main Points at which Resinous and Vitreous Electrical Fluids (or a Mixture of both) should be employed.

—Baron Albrecht von Stoßenknopf

A List of D E A T H S for February 1736

Jan. 29. Sir Brownlowe Sherard, Bt in Burlington Gardens. He was of a human Disposition, kind to his Servants dislik’d all extravagent Expence, but very liberal of his Fortune, as well to his Relations and Friends, as to Numbers of Distressed Objects ;  and in particular, to St George’s Hospital, near Hyde-Park Corner.

Feb. 11. Vesey Hart, Esq ;  of Lincoln’s-Inn. About 15 Months ago he took the celebrated Pill, which had at first such violent Effects as to throw him into Convulsions, and deprive him of his Sight ;  on Recovery he fell into a Consumption.

March 1735-36

Dr RADCLIFFE’s Powder. The prodigious Run which this Medicine has had of late for the W O R M S, occasions this Advertisment of it for the Publick Good. It was originally calculated for the Use and Benefit of the P O O R ;  and to suit the better to their Circumstances, is Sold at the easy Expence of One Shilling, in Sealed Bottles, at Mrs Twisck’s, a Perfume-Shop, at the sign of the Pheasant in St James’s Market. N. B. Allowance by the Dozen.

Monday, March 1.

Being Her Majesty’s Birth Day, who then enter’d Her 54th Year, the Court was very numerous, tho’ not so Splendid as usual, in order to appear with greater Lustre at His Highness’s Nuptials, next Month. But at Bath, the Countess Dowager of Pembrook, gave the greatest Ball ever seen there, above 300 Persons being present ;  And Stephen Pointz, Esq ;  gave an Entertainment to 20 poor Women of that Place, and entirely Cloath’d them.

Monday, 15.

All manner of Grain fell at Bear-Key, and Distiller’s Barley bore no price on the Account of the Bill to restrain the Consumption of Spirtuous Liquors, so Destructive to the Labouring People, when Drank to Excess ;  which Bill lays a Penalty of 100 l. for Selling less than 5 Gallons without a Licence, and all Licences to pay 50 l. a year, besides a duty of 20 s. a gallon of all that shall be retailed.

Saturday, 20.

The Greyhound, a large Inn at Maidenhead, was Burnt down to the Ground, and only 3 Feather-beds out of 36 saved. Three of the Servants being suspected were committed to Gaol. Mr Freeman Master of the Inn shot himself a few days after.

Wednesday, 24.

His Majesty gave Royal Assent to. 1. The Land Tax bill, 2. The Mutiny Bill, 3. To an Act for repealing an Act against Conjuration and Witchcraft, 4. For widening the Road from St Dunstans Cross to Canturbury, 5… ∓ c.

Society Transactions, Item Nº 101.

Wolf Dreams

A Report by Mr Solomon ben Ezra

Much Society Business was in Evidence at the Kinsky Masque. I attended my Lord Foppingham (wise Aristotle to his dashing Alexander) but took no active Part in the Excitements that ensued. Instead I indulged myself in assiduous observation of the Guests and – I confess it – some eavesdropping.

Noting in particular the relatively high Incidence of bovine and canine Guises, I gravitated to these Groups, who by and large seemed to herd (or pack) together. It was in my mind that the Wearers might correspond to those Societies on whose activities we have oft times reported in these Pages. An overheard Remark from One dog-masked Couple, alluding to a Dogwells in Whitefriars, particularly caught my Ear – perhaps because of the furtiveness of the Delivery – and I resolved to myself to discover more about this Place.

I was little surprised to find that Dogwells Court to be an obscure Backstreet and the Location of a notorious gambling Den and Dog-pit. I sought the Aid of Mr Elmhill, a Man more familiar than I with the seedier Side of our fair City, to see whether we could not enter the Place and see what was afoot. Entry it seemed was by Ticket only, but by his Street-wisdom, Elmhill was able to obtain a Pair and the Two of us, I disguised as his Brother, were able to gain admittance.

The Scenes inside did no Credit to this City, nor to Mankind in general. In the main Hall there were Two Arenas, one for dog-fighting the Other for ratting. The Place jostled with the vilest and most degraded Specimens of Humanity – from all Strata of Society (though exclusively Male) – all enthralled by the Sight of Animals tearing each other apart and laying Bets on the Outcome. We mingled and observed, laying the occasional Bet the better to play our chosen Parts. We soon became aware that some of the Patrons – mostly the more prosperous in Appearance – were being invited into another Chamber. Elmhill’s Experience in such rough Dens (and some of my Guineas) allowed us to insinuate ourselves amongst these Gentlemen despite our relatively shabby Appearance. We were led through winding subterranean Passages to another Hall.

In this Place the Patrons were richer, the Betting more frenetic, the Stakes higher and the Spectacle more degraded. I noted several Members of the Establishment there amongst the blood-drunk Crowd, including a Peer of the Realm. The first “Entertainment” was a Man called Pugh who with naught but his Fists took on and slew Twenty Dogs. However, this was just an Appetiser for the main Event. A Ringmaster stood forth and warned Patrons that what was to come might be disturbing and dangerous, calling on the weak of Heart and Stomach to leave now. It was certainly disturbing to the Pocket, for a Surcharge of Ten Guineas per Person was demanded, which probably saw more Patrons leave than his dire Warnings regarding the Spectacle.

A Cage was lowered over the Arena, Grating removed from one of the feeder Passages and from it issued a Woman, naked, dishevelled, miserable of Aspect. Yet beneath the Layers of Filth and the long bedraggled Hair it was possible to discern the beautiful Visage of none other than Maria Zhevon, Werewolf and former Paramour of Milord Foppingham, last seen under the Protection of Serious Wakefield. Clearly, Rumours of her Death – at the hands of a Member of this Society – were somewhat exaggerated. It was a pitiable Sight to see this Woman torn at by the Pack of Hounds that issued from another Entrance as the Crowd bayed for her Blood and wagered on how long she would last. Yet knowing her as I did, I was little surprised when with a Howl she transformed into a huge ravening Beast that ripped the Dogs to shreds in Seconds. She then threw herself at the Bars of the Cage gnawing at them in Rage and Frustration before eventually collapsing Exhausted and being dragged away by Hooks into the Passage from whence she had emerged.

The Show being over, the Crowd dispersed. I took the opportunity to wipe a Kerchief over the area where the Werewolf had gnawed the Bars thus obtaining some Personalia of the Beast. Burly Doormen were free with their Threats as I left, warning me to say Nothing of what I had seen outside the Den lest “She” be set after me. An impractical Proposition I felt but I held myself meekly enough in the Face of it. Elmhill clearly made some Impression upon One of these Gentlemen, though whether it was on Account of his plucky Demeanour, as they said, or because he appeared more gullible than the general Sort, I cannot say. However, it seems that there was some Suggestion that he might be considered for Employment there. There were also dark Hints that he could become a Werewolf himself and lead a Pack if he played his Cards right.

As I left that vile Place I determined that, even though Maria Zhevon might be a dangerous and morally ambivalent Creature herself, I could not find it in my Conscience to abandon her to her Fate in that dreadful Place. Though Elmhill urged Caution, pointing out her previous Career as an Actress and Entertainer, and hypothesising that it might all be an Act and she a willing and indeed central Participant, for my part I thought this unlikely. I could not conceive that the Misery I had seen in her Face could be simulated by any Thespian no matter how Talented. Nevertheless, I acknowledged to myself some Worm of Doubt and resolved to test her Unconscious by insinuating myself into her Dreams. Using the Personalia I had taken I created for myself a Focus and cast the Rituals of Yesod that would allow me to enter her Dreamworld and take Stock of her State of Mind. I will not enter into the Details of that Journey but what I discovered there convinced me that she was indeed the Prisoner she seemed. It also allowed me to see into her innermost Desires and this in turn showed me a Way in which EFFECTUAL REDRESS could be obtained for Mistress Zhevon without endangering my fellow Citizens of London.

Society Members with an Interest in such Things will recall my recent Journey, in Company with Lord Foppingham, into the iconic Realm of Aegypt. To deliver Maria from Durance vile to a Place where her Condition would not be a Curse to her and to those around, I reasoned that I must journey into another iconic Realm – of wild boreal Forests and the mythic North.

I will pass over the details of the Researches I undertook to allow me to encompass this not inconsiderable philosophical Endeavour. Suffice it say that some Days later, myself and the trusty Elmhill found ourselves in a Drift of Snow facing the Charge of a Caribou of unusual Size. Luckily Elmhill’s Facility with a Musket saw us safe from this Peril. Indeed he would have had a most magnificent Set of Antlers for his oft-quoted Mother to set over her Fireplace but for the appearance of an enormous Snow Tiger. We decided that the most advantageous Course of Action would be to leave the Carcass of the giant Ungulate to its Attentions and Proceed with Haste from the Vicinity.

Our Mission was to obtain appropriately iconic Material from that Realm that I might construct a Device that would reliably transport there again. I had successfully achieved that Translation once from my Laboratory, but if my Plan was to work I must have a means to perform the Ritual swiftly and potentially under much more stressful and demanding Circumstances.

As we wandered in the boreal Forests, still considering how we should more completely evade the Attentions of said Snow-Tiger, we heard the Sound of Drumbeats not far off in the Woods. Keen to meet the Denizens of this Realm (I speak for myself – it seems that Elmhill’s Mother had counselled him against social interaction with Strangers) we set off in that Direction. Shortly thereafter we encountered a local Shaman, Etziki, who proved friendly enough, if a little eccentric, and his Drum which seemed to assume a role somewhat independent of its Master. With the Drum in the Role of Translator, we recounted our Quest to the little Shaman, who appeared to approve. He offered us a Necklace of carved Wolf’s Teeth in exchange for Elmhill’s Musket, in Order, I assumed, to put it beyond use for it was clear he thought little of it. A more auspicious iconic Focus could not be imagined so I gladly accepted the Trade (though Elmhill muttered darkly about the Musket having cost him “good Money”, and quoted his Mother on the Subject at Length). Our Objective achieved we returned to London – with, it seemed, a little Assistance from our new Friend.

On our Return we immediately set about Preparations to enact the next Stage of the Plan. While I immersed myself once more in my Studies, Elmhill sought a more mundane Way to enter that Den of Iniquity in Dogswell Court – a Task in which he proved most adept. He also obtained the Intelligence that the next Show was to be on Friday, some Five Days hence. Rather than wait till then and attempt anything under the Eye of the baying Crowd (I was in any Case reluctant to essay anything taxing on the Sabbath), or abandon Maria Zhevon to another Night of such Agonies, we resolved to enter secretly into the Den on the Thursday night. In so determining we made a serious Error of Judgement, overlooking a crucial Factor that very nearly brought all our cunning Plans to Nought.

Led by Elmhill’s skills and aided by various Charms I had prepared, we crept undetected into the Den and unto its very Heart. There we found all deserted. It seemed that good Fortune was with us and we would be able to free the Lady with no great Incident. Alas it was at this Point that we realised our Oversight. The Moon was full and bright and would be high in the Sky for many Hours to come. The Lady was no Lady but a Wolf that Night. What should have been a simple Matter of transporting a willing and grateful Subject became an Exercise fraught with dreadful Danger as I sought to lay Hands on this terrifying Beast without being rent Limb from Limb, long enough to deploy the Device. It was a momentous Test of our Resolve. Poor Mr Elmhill in particular, lacking a Scholar’s Detachment, was sore beset by his Fears.

In the End it was touch and go – but touch and go was exactly what I sought and in the Blink of an Eye, all Three of us found ourselves in that boreal Forest in the Mythic North. The Wolf bounded away to explore her new-found Freedom. With Help once more from our Friend Etziki, I was able to return Mr Elmhill to London and the Bosom of his beloved Mother and myself to my Business and Studies, content in the Knowledge that we had once more obtained a Measure of EFFECTUAL REDRESS.

Although chiefly moved by Pity for Maria Zhevon, I confess that in coming to her Aid I also was motivated by a secondary Objective. Mistress Zhevon was clearly deeply embroiled with the Evil Dog Societies of London. Freed from their malign Influence, I hoped that, whether inspired by Gratitude or Revenge, she would be prepared to reveal Secrets that would be to the Detriment of that vile Crew. In particular she was once under the protection of Mr Wakefield, a Protection that proved ineffectual or more likely False. In the Event the Timing and Circumstance of her Release made meaningful Converse impossible. However, it is to be hoped that when Selene’s silver Chariot has once more waned I may be able to return thence and question her on these Matters.

Society Transactions

Mr Byron and Followers gave Account of the discovery, in a Fleet Sewer, of an illict Press of curious Design, printing Seditions and Forgeries.

See also Mr Arrows’ Sketches, Notes and Fancies upon the Events described, as preserved on the original Napkins held in the Society Archive.

April 1736

Society Transactions, Item Nº 109.

Interview with the Werewolf

A Report by Mr Solomon ben Ezra

Those Gentlemen of the Society who follow such Things will recall my Account of the Rescue of Mistress Maria Zhevon, a Lady of Lupine Tendency, held in Durance vile through the Machinations of Mr Serious Wakefield. They will recall that the Moon being in its fullest Waxing, the Lady was ill-disposed to converse at the Time of the Rescue. This being so, I undertook to return to the Lands of the Iconic North, to whence I had transported her, when the Moon had waned sufficiently, in hope of discovering more of her Tale and in particular her dealings with Wakefield – to his anticipated Detriment. I am now in a Position to relate the Outcome of that Discourse.

The translation to the Iconic Realms was undertaken without great Incident. All wise Men familiar with the wilder parts of Creation advise against travelling alone in such Environs. My normal Associates of this Society being unavailable, I took as my Companion my Uncle Grigory, a seafaring Man of substantial and diverse Experience. So it was that he and I, well protected against the Elements and armed against such wild Beasts as we might Encounter, found ourselves in the wintry Woodland of the Iconic Northlands where I had left Mistress Zhevon in her wolfish Guise. It was a matter of small Art from there to locate her in that Place.

It transpired that she had been welcomed to the Bosom of a Tribe of local Hunters who as Chance or Fate would have it were especially worshipful of the Wolf. She appeared sleek, well-fed and, importantly, Human. Though at first wary, and somewhat forgetful of the Service I had rendered her, she proved willing enough to speak with me and indeed, as her Memory returned, to indicate her Gratitude. I will not attempt to render our Discourse Verbatim but offer here a Summary of salient Points.

She confirmed what I had already surmised regarding Wakefield’s part in her Downfall. He had approached her very shortly after that Supper at which Milord Foppingham had politely but firmly indicated to her that London was not to be considered the ideal Domicile for a Werewolf. Wakefield offered her his Protection and under the Circumstances she saw no Reason to decline his Offer and many to accept.

At first he treated her well. He asked little of her except to assist him in a number of Rituals, the Import of which were at the Time obscure to her but seemed to require Nothing of her but her Presence. It was only later that she realised that she was in effect being used as Bait to lure other Werewolves into his service. It was when she challenged him on this Matter it became clear that the Power he held over her was more Sinister than that merely of a Protector and Benefactor. That the Chains in which he held her were invisible to the Eye made them no less Potent than if they were made of the strongest Steel. However, it seems that his Power over her was not such that could compel her absolutely. Sending her to fight in the Pits was a Punishment for her withdrawal of Cooperation with his Rituals – part of a Strategy to break her to his Will. Her Wariness when first I came to her was due to her Fear that I had been sent by Wakefield to bring her back.

Naturally, my Interest was piqued by the Intelligence that Wakefield was drawing to him Wolfman Servitors. It seems that there is a Church in London that is a Gateway between this World and another of similar but subtly different Substance. She could tell me little of it but that it was in some way guarded by a Race of Werewolves (who she characterised as being somewhat different from herself – “as an Italian is to an Englishman”). It was these Guards that Wakefield was seducing from their Duty with her Scent (I am being as delicate as I may but I am sure the more worldly of my Audience will have grasped the Nature of her Allure in this Ritual). She thought that there were some Half a Dozen Werewolves in his employ. Even more alarmingly from the standpoint of the concerned Londoner, it appears that through their Bite these Beasts can confer their Nature upon the ordinary Man. This last Detail seems to confirm the Gist of the Conversation I reported in my last Account between Mr Elmhill and One of the Ruffians at Dogwell’s, and raises the Question of whether Wakefield, no Stranger to breeding Dogs may be generating a Race of Werewolves in his Thrall.

As regards Wakefield himself, she could tell me that he had a Workshop and Kennels below Ground Level in his House. His Coach is also clearly a Place of Power, and his work Premises likewise have Facilities for carrying out Rituals. He views himself as having some affinity with Sirius, the Dog Star. He has some sort of astronomical Chart illustrating this which he showed Maria, although she had little Learning or Interest with which to appreciate it.

She observed that Wakefield was a singularly industrious Character – always working, usually on several Projects at once. Though he has a lovely Wife and Children, she only ever saw him Smile when looking upon the Works of his Hands. He worships Orderliness and hard Work. He only keeps useful Servants and None for Show – no Footmen for instance.

He appears quite obsessed with Lord Foppingham, whom he views as his Arch-enemy, despising and fearing him in equal Measure. He was beside himself when his House was broken into some Months ago and immediately fixed the blame on Milord – though clearly he can have had Nothing whatsoever to do with such an Occurrence.

“Whenever Anything goes wrong there’s always that bloody great big Pansy, at the back of it – that idle, good for Nothing, simpering, gilded Excrescence, bowing and waving his Handkerchief.”

It was perhaps naïve of me to think that in bringing Maria Zhevon to the Place of her Dreams, I would bring her Contentment such that she would never have to seek out the City again. But a Fortnight in that Place, she was already exhibiting Signs of chafing against her bucolic Existence and indicated that she might soon depart to seek a Society more sophisticated than that of her savage Hosts. Although I forbore to repeat to her Lord Foppingham’s injunction to abjure the City, I am sure it was in her mind that I too had been Party to that Warning.

I am sure that this was behind her Reluctance to allow me to cast the Ritual on her that would have allowed me to see whether Wakefield maintained any residual Hold on her, fearing that she might simply exchange One Oppressor for Another. I confess that this might have been a Temptation, although I like to think that Honour would have won out over self Interest in this Matter. Nevertheless I am left sharing Mistress Zhevon’s concern that Serious Wakefield, so tenacious in his Attempts to arraign Jack Church for his alleged Complicity in the abstraction of the Statue of Anubis, may seek to track her down in Vengeance or in Order to use her in whatever vainglorious Mischief he seeks to wreak next. It must fall to the Gentlemen of this Society to ensure that Mr Wakefield has other Matters to occupy his Attentions.

Sunday, 4 April 1736.

Mr Andrew Pitt, an Eminent Quaker, &c. waited on the Pr of Wales to solicit his Favour in Relation to the Quakers Tythe Bill, whom His Royal H. answer’d to this Effect. — ‘ As I am a Friend to Liberty in General and to Toleration in particular, I wish you may meet with all proper Favour, but for myself I never give my Vote in Parliament, and to Influence my Friends, or direct my Servants in theirs, does not become my Station. To leave them entirely to their own Conscience and Understanding, is a Rule I have hitherto prescrib’d to myself, and purpos’d throughout my whole Life ot observe.’ Mr Pitt overcome with this Conduct, reply’d, — May it Please the Pr. of Wales! — ‘ I am greatly affected with your excellent notions of Liberty ;  and am more Pleased with the Answer you have given us, than if you had granted our Request.’

Wednesday, 14 April 1736.

Seven Prisoners in Newgate, under Sentence of Transprtation, found means to get down the common Sewer, and four of ’em got up a Vault into a House in Fleet Lane, 3 of whom went thro’ the Shop and made their Escape, a 4th was secure’d and carried back to Newgate.

Thursday, 15 April 1736.

One Wilson was hang’d at Edinburgh for robbing Collector Stark. He having made an Attempt to break Prison, and his Comrade having actually got off, the Magistrates had the City Guards and the Welsh Fusiliers under Arms during Execution, which was performed without Disturbance ; but on the Hangman’s cutting down the Corpse (the Magistrate being withdrawn) the Boys threw some Dirt and Stones, which falling amongst the City Guard, Capt. Porteous fired, and order’d his Men to fire ; whereupon above 20 Persons were wounded, 6 or 7 kill’d, one shot thro’ the Head at a Window up Two Pairs of Stairs. The Capt. and several of his Men were after committed to Prison.

Thursday, 22 April 1736.

A Fire broke out in Upper Shadwell, which burn’d down three Houses. One Mr. Stringer’s whose Aunt, aged 79, was entirely consum’d except a Leg ; Mr Stringer’s House was burn’d down a Year ago, by a Fire which happen’d at the same Place.

Society Transactions, Item Nº 110.

An Intimation from Mr Solomon ben Ezra.

Gentlemen of the Society

Allow me to continue my Account of the Matter of Wakefield and the Werewolves.

Some Days after my return from my Third Venture to the Iconic North and my Conversation with the Werewolf, Maria Zhevon, I took Counsel with my Lord Foppingham and we resolved to explore the haunted Church whence, she alleged, the Werewolves whom the vile Wakefield had seduced to his Cause issued. Our Purpose was to make contact with those who were not in his Thrall to see whether they might be prepared to make some common Cause with us against him and their erstwhile Fellows.

So resolved, we obtained the Services of two other Society Members: the first being the Teutonic Clockworker, Herr Doctor Stoffennuts (as close as I can render his outlandish Name in English); the second a stout young country Fellow, new-come to the City, by the Name of Simon Godwin. This latter was rendered much round-Eyed to find himself in the Company of a Jew, a Foreigner and a notorious Rake – a Situation so exactly that against which his Guardians had no Doubt warned that it must have seemed to him that he had fallen into a veritable Parable of the Innocent fallen into Ill Company. That was merely the Start of the Venture for him.

We set off in Foppingham’s Carriage to the Vicinity of this Church. Young Godwin, engaged with Foppingham to be his Footman (did I mention that he was an Innocent?), hung upon the Back. The Church proved oddly inaccessible. However, after traversing an evil smelling Passage – some more elegantly than others – we found ourselves in a somewhat ill-kempt Churchyard guarded by Three huge Wolves. Fortunately Milord Foppingham, applying the kind of Discernment normally applied to selecting his Attire for the Day, noted some small Clues that these might be Phantasms – though their Fangs and growling Visages appeared most unpleasantly Real. Fortunately the Act of disbelieving robbed them of their Power over us and they vanished instanter.

The Church itself was a most odd Structure. I am no Expert on Christian Architectures but even I could discern that it eschewed the normal Configurations of such Edifices. I cast some Figures to discover what I could about its underlying Characteristics (while Godwin shuffled nervously, making clandestine and utterly ineffective Wardings with his Fingers, as unschooled country Folk are wont to when faced with the Practice of true Science). Its Aura hinted at what one might term “Otherwhereness”. The Graveyard was equally Strange. One prominent Grave we noted was that of a Woman by the name of Alice Hardgreave who died in 1673 and made reference to the “GreenChrist” – a Reference as baffling to the Christian Gentlemen of our Company as it was to me.

The only exit was a locked Gate. This proved no hindrance to the learned Doctor who showed considerable Facility with Mechanisms and was indeed also remarkably well equipped for the Task. Foppingham, seeing an opportunity for his new Footman to shine, sent him forth through the Gate to see what might be discovered. Some small while later he returned in some Haste with News of a small Group of singularly villainous Fellows heading our Way. On his advice we determined these Fellows perhaps not to be the sort with whom we might easily converse – especially in the Role of un-introduced Trespassers on their Domain. We determined then to leave Milord Foppingham’s calling Card as the gentlemanly way of making their Acquaintance and departed the Scene in the most speedy Fashion available to us.

So it was, some Days later we found ourselves trailed by a Pair of unusually large Hounds as we made our way to Kent’s one Morning. We diverted ourselves to St. James’s Park, thinking it to be public enough to avoid the possibility of Ambush on either Side, yet private enough to facilitate discreet Converse. In the first Assumption at least we were to be confounded. Sure enough, our Two lupine Pursuers approached us in the Stand of Bushes where we awaited and sembled into two apparent Humans – a Man and a Woman. However, no sooner had our Parley begun when we became aware of the approach of a veritable Gang of Footpads. Our Interlocutors made themselves scarce quite sharpish and we were left to deal with perhaps Eight of these Varlets. We all laid to with a Will, each thinking that London had come to a sorry pass when a Westminster Magistrate no less, and his Associates cannot take a Walk in a public Park without being set upon by such low Fellows.

In the Event we saved the Hangman the Trouble of attending to a Couple of them, One got away and the Remainder we took in for Questioning. Once again it appears that Wakefield had the Effrontery (working through Intermediaries, of course, to avoid the direct embroilment with the Law) to have Footpads attempt to assault Milord Foppingham in broad Daylight. We obtained Affidavits to that Effect from the Prisoners go (at least the ones that survived a Night in Newgate).

Our attempt to Parley on neutral Territory having been thwarted, we returned once more to the Church. After braving once more the phantasmal Wolves therein we were able once more to engage with the female Werewolf who appeared the more senior of the Two. Her Name, interestingly enough, she gave as Alice Hardgreave. She gave us to understand that the disappearance of her Confreres was indeed of great Concern to her, though she was not aware that Wakefield’s Hand was behind it. She gave us the disturbing News that there were no less than Ten missing Werewolves of her Company, a truly shocking Number. Disappointingly she appeared reluctant to take any direct Action herself – her first Duty being to the Guardianship of the Churchyard. She did, however, indicate that she might be able to make herself available in a supporting Role.

We parted on cordial Terms and returned to Kent’s to take Counsel on how we might proceed.

A List of D E A T H S for April 1736

Apr. 16. Mr Andr. Pitt, at Hampstead of a Gout Fit in his Stomach. Mr Voltaire, in his Letters concerning the English Nation Says, ‘ He was one of the most eminent Quakers in England, who after having traded 30 Years, had the Wisdom to prescribe Limits to his Fortunes and Desires … He was of a hale ruddy Complexion, and had never been afflicted with Sickness, because he had always been insensible to Passions, and a perfect Stranger to Intemperance.’ and some of our News Papers add, — He inherited many Virtues, and wanted every Vice. —

From the diary of Baron Albrecht von Stoβenknopf

With my Experiments coming to maturity, it is Time to test out some of them in the Company of like-minded Men in the Pursuit of Effective Redress.

The most noticeable of those I sought was a Lord Foppingham, and finding him was little Matter as he was to be found mincing here and there and was most disposed to meeting at Kent’s. There I found him in likeable Company in the form of a pretty Farm Girl and a Jew. The latter, ben Ezra, was describing a certain Mr Wakefield, his interest in Canines and his apparent head Dog, Mr Boyce.

I had to admit my Surprise when the Farm Girl turned out to be a young Lad called Simon, but he seemed as useful with a Club as he was Superstitious. We looked to be heading to a ruined Church, where Foppingham had decided to throw a Picnic and do a spot of Watercolour Painting as Cover for our investigations and a little experimenting.

Going deeper into the back Alleys of Spittalfields we finally find a small Tunnel into a Courtyard. Foppingham showed the World (what little there was there to Witness) how to do a perfect Duck Walk through the filthy low Tunnel. Simon and I make passable Imitations while ben Ezra resorts to crawling through the Stench on his Hands and Knees.

Once in the Clearing, and keeping a good Distance from the stinking ben Ezra, we advance on the Church. Suddenly a Dog/Wolf appears and move towards us. The First makes for Foppingham and whilst he entertains it, Simon shows his usefulness by clobbering it in the Ear with a burning Torch sending it skulking back. A white Wolf makes an Entrance and we are all gripped with a fearful Nausea which quickly passes us, except that the Jew appears to have emptied his Bladder in his Britches, only adding to the Odour emanating from him.

The dandy Lord’s keen sight spies something not quite right with the Wolves and deduces that they are merely some Sort of clever Projection and not real at all. ben Ezra has his Resolve tested as One leaps at him, but he wins the Battle of Mind over Non-Matter and all Three Canines vanish.

Urged on by the necessity to keep a Distance from the trailing Stench, we enter the ransacked Tabernacle and after some fruitless searching, it is once again the astute Foppingham who notices that the Bricks are noticeably odd, and most definitely not London Brick. ben Ezra now shows his Worth by delving into the Sephirot to read the Aura of the Bricks. He determines that there is an Aspect of Un-Reality to them, as if they are only shallow and not really here, but yet, are here also. I suspect that it may be that they are in Two Places at the same Time. With further use of Rituals it is found that this Building has been built and demolished many Times in this place, changing Shape or Layout too.

we speculate as we look about, and Foppingham leaves his calling Card on the Altar at ben Ezra’s Suggestion so that whoever is here can contact him, while I search the Grounds around the Building. Ah, a strange Tomb I find, one with Tree Motifs about the Stonework and the Words proclaiming “Alice Hardgrave d 1673, Green Christ have mercy on her”. My English fails me to decipher this odd use of Words, and further searching for other Examples proves fruitless.

The only other Exit is a locked Gate, the Lock of which yields easily to my mechanical Skills so that it may be opened quickly another Time. The brave Simon is volunteered to take a Look out the Gate, and is gone but a few Minutes when he returns with a Report of Three Strangers, Two large Dogs-types and a smaller ragged Dog with sharp Teeth scampering about as though looking for new Meat. He saw these over a further locked Gate onto what seemed to be a shining Roadway, but made a hasty and un-noticed Retreat just in Time.

It is decided that we are best not found here, and the quickest way out involves some mystical Translocation – the hardest Part of which is the need to get close enough to the Sewer-smelling ben Ezra to be in physical Contact. And dizzyingly soon we are safe and sound from Trouble in a small Closet in his humble Dwelling Place.

ben Ezra then realises that the calling card Foppingham has left at his Suggestion will mean he can be found… by Anyone… or Anything… and thus has to murmur and incant further to protect him from being traced once more. A restful Night is spent in the Rooms of Foppingham’s more spacious Residence where we take up Rooms in close proximity.

One Night stretches into Two, then a Third, and after sending for a change of Wardrobe from my country House we feel a Promenade up The Strand would be better than confining ourselves Indoors.

Though my German Fashion is not nearly as grand as Foppingham’s (something I must address at some Point) we do cut rather dashing Figures, he and I Side by Side, as we are admired by the Crowd.

Sadly there were no Wurst-sellers in these Streets, though we noticed a Pair of Dogs on our Trail and the Jew suggested it was best to head for a quieter part of Town so as not to cause Commotion. Sure enough, as we enter St James’ Park the Two Wolfs, One white/grey the other dark, turn into Human Form.

We exchange Greetings, and I deduce the white/grey Wolf is Alice Hardgrave (she does seem surprised when I address her as such) and she replies that it seems a long Time ago now. When ben Ezra informs her that he is seeking an Audience with Mr Boyce, she points to her Companion and says we have found him.

Foppingham outlines the Fact that we feel that they have been influenced by a Person in London who uses canine Means to his own Ends and dabbles in Sorcery and they start to negotiate around mutually beneficial Behaviours.

No sooner has Conversation started when several Thugs appear from the Bushes, Two at one Side and Four Behind, and only our heightened Awareness of this strange Situation catches them as they emerge. I am the closest to an armed Villain and draw my Weapon and thrust into the nearest Thug. I skewer him like a Bratwurst from the Grill, and he sizzles nicely as he falls back with a serious Wound from my crackling Double-Stiletto.

ben Ezra downs another of the Six with a fine Horse-Pistol Shot, while Foppingham pulls out his small Piece and unloads into a hapless Yob, winging him. Not one to miss an Opportunity, the dashing Dandy advances quickly with Sword and Pistol drawn in a magnificently stylish Manner, and wings the same Curmudgeon with a Second Shot… though he seems irritated yet relatively unhurt. The forgetfully unarmed Simon dives in and stabs the second armed Man close to myself, just as I unleash an Electrical Discharge at the same Target. He is sorely blackened but ignores Simon and I and shoots instead at Foppingham but thankfully misses.

Foppingham stabs at the Man-Mountain in front of him, again just as this Human Tree bodyslams him. The noble Lord mincingly steps aside to let him land Face down in the Dirt. ben Ezra invokes some Debt-collecting Skills to splatter the Cur charging at him, as Another takes his Chance to run off.

The country lad, Simon shows a surprising Turn of Speed as he chases after the singed One and brings him Down. I dive into the Bush and find my first Target there, still groggy and sit on him. Pressing my Advantage of immediate Terror I interrogate the scared Rabbit in the Bush immediately only to find that he says the Leader was the One who got away, Mike Jones, who can be found at Ware Court or the Inns around that Part.

We clear up the Guns as the local Constable arrives, and tally up Two dead, One Escapee and Three Prisoners: Michael Ryan (the One I talked to) John Napper and Taff Jones.

A short while later, in the privacy of a Room at the secure Roundhouse, ben Ezra cleans up Napper’s Wounds, and Foppingham offers him a Choice: to cooperate and secure Favour… or not and sit in Jail.

Napper squeals that it was “Chopper’s” Idea but after some Persuasion he admits old Dogberry put them up to it. Chopper was the Leader and Dogberry gives them Tips – he’s apparently One of Wakefield’s Men and we gain a Description of him middle Aged, own Hair, good Looking well turned out (relatively speaking). Of the other two Jones is tight Lipped, and Ryan is incoherent from his Wounds and gives no further Information.

Foppingham jails all three anyway despite promising Release for Cooperation, I am thinking I like this harsh Justice, but then in an about Turn, he releases Napper, gives him some Coin to go to my own country House where we can find him again if needs be. After overcoming his Amazement, Napper how-you-say “legs it” never to be seen again.

A short debate ensued as to what our next Steps should be. As a precaution, ben Ezra spent some effort in conjuring and blessing Foppingham’s Sword. The indignant Look on his Face when his Lord eagerly produced a Bag of other Weaponry was worth seeing, and it was quickly agreed that this was not a Blessing Mill – though the repetitive Action needed gave me some private Ideas for later Inventions that I could use mechanical Means to achieve.

This time arming his now-trusty Follower with more than a borrowed Knife, Foppingham led us once more to the strange Building in the depths of Spital Fields.

Once again the illusionary Wolfdogs appear, and the First leaps to attack Foppingham, and his Resolve is sorely tested as he is Wounded from the fake Bite. My able Mind ignores the Beast that leaps at me, ben Ezra is also able to blank them too, but Foppingham struggles to bring his not inconsiderable Skills to bear upon the Matter. Though his Undergarments did not stay maybe as White as they were that Morning, he triumphs in the End and the Three spirit Dogs disappear.

All is clear now, and we go in and meet Alice Hardgrave, the Werewolf of the Grave we found. She admits the protecting Illusions are not hers, she cannot turn them off but ben Ezra and she talk for some Length on agreeing we have a common Enemy. Her Comrades are disappearing, abandoning their Posts, at a greater Rate than previously, though she knows not of the man called Wakefield.

She denies that her Bite causes transfer of the Were-Disease and in low Voices there are talks of Rituals that cannot be performed without certain Persons present; that she protects this Place because there are Things that she doesn’t want Seekers to take Home with them and they will run wild and harm without meaning to. This is a weak Place, she cannot be sure to keep “stupidly Wise” Men at Bay, though she bites their Heads off when she can. ben Ezra tells her that Wakefield in one such Man, and he possibly owns the Souls of the Pack of Dogs he uses. If so, the Souls would be guarded in maybe One of only Three Places.

Mistress Hardgrave asks how she can assist without exposing herself further as she seeks to recapture those she calls her own. It is agreed that if we can somehow release her People, then she can take them away… not far away, but away from this Plane perhaps?

The Wolflady also admits that the Cycle of the Moon makes a difference – but only for the wild Ones, and that Silver has only limited use. There is no Weakness she admits to, but says Death isn’t easy but for a while it is disabling… implying that it is not final by any means. Her Suggestion is to use Scents to lure and trap, I presume she means the Bitch’s Heat, and they operate very much on or below Ground for the Heights are not theirs. Death will separate them into Two Halfs: mortal Man and mortal Wolf. If they are not rejoined, then that is what you end up with.

My mind wanders to Machines that could capture this Spirit and to other Devices and before I know it, the Conversation is over and we are on our way with Plans forming. I realise I need to get to my Workbook to write up the Events and sketch my Ideas for improvements to my portable Lightning Fork, and dust off the spare Device and bring that up to working Order too before we next foray into the gloom in order to dispense Effective Redress to those deserving of it.

The Foppingham Diaries

Man’s Beast Fiend

I meet a Foreigner and a Bumpkin – April 5th, 1736

To Kent’s, in my new Wig. His Majesty lately havg appointed me as One of his Justices for the County of Middlesex, I have given much Thought as to which kind of Wig will most readily convey the awful Majesty of the Law to Wrongdoers. At some Length fixed upon a rather heavy, thick Ramillies, of the last Age. A most terribly fraught Hour with the Perruquier to make all quite Right, was at Length absolutely required to dash, having appointed to discuss late Events touching the Gin Trade with SbE. Arrived slightly if fashionably Late. Kent’s was unwontedly quiet, but I espied that worthy Roue avant to be in talk with Strangers, new come upon the Town. The most remarkable of these, a young Fellow of quaintly rustic Hue, that nonetheless carried his Cloathes in creditable Style, one Simon Godwin. Regrettably said Cloathes were really not at all the Thing, and thus was obliged to re-equip him as one of my Footmen. I understand he is come up from the Village of Clod, far in the Country. Rather better dressed, albeit in a frankly rather continental Manner, one von Stoßenknopf, a Man of considerable learning by his own Account. It seemed he was a Fryer of some Kind, I must suppose of some new-fangled Order that encourages their Mendicants to Philosophy. I was a little surprised when SbE proposed that we Four sally forth to seek after Boys, implying a Side to his Nature I had never heretofore suspected. To cover my Confusion I suggested an alfresco Picnic, where I could amuse myself with a Trifle of Water-Colour; to be truthful I was somewhat tried by the way my Companions would persist in mumbling. Dispatched a Flunkey to the Square to order my Coach and all needful Things, including a smaller Wig (a light Bob) more suited to an outdoor Occasion. Coach and Four, Easel, Hamper and Wig arrived, and once inside, the Others finally had the Courtesy to express themselves in normal Tones. Thus in search of Spital Church, where we would mayhap find a Mr Boyes that SbE had caught Tell of, SbE’s Meaning now being Clear.

Spital Square, it turned out, was not a well favoured Spot. At Length we descried a squalid, malodorous Passage. We ran the Gauntlet of this Tunnel, passing over the worst of the Ordure; though SbE contrived for his own inscrutable Reasons to smear Sir Reverence liberally about his Person. Within, we came upon a decayed overgrown Graveyard through which sundry Paths wound towards a central Building. No great Way along we heard a low Growl and espied an enormous Wolf that menaced us from a Thicket. The Charms we bore seemed ineffectual. Young SG spiritedly assaulted the Beast, hurling a flaming Link that he carried, but the Effect was Scant. I noticed an Oddity, but before I could call out, a Second Wolf – white this Time – appeared to our Left, as the First leapt to attack SbE. As I realised what my Eyes had seen – that SG’s Link had passed through his Target like a Ghost – the black One passed through a startled SbE completely and vanished. He was none the worse for this terrifying Experience, the cloacal Stench he emitted being merely the Result of his earlier Misfortunes. We made our Way to the Chapel.

A Building of no noble Proportion this. The Floor mere Earth, save for a side Wing, where Stone Flags propped a great Stone Table that might have served as an Altar. A Mezzanine boasted the Remains of some Hangings, but Decay was Everywhere. We roamed around the ramshackle Structure, observing the misshapen Bricks, warily keeping SbE at a some Distance. He was in a Corner, muttering darkly to himself, as he does often tend to. “Rootless!” quoth he. “an Aspect of Unreality – built and re-built many Times”. My building Contractor Scroggins often holds forth in much this Vein when tasked with extending the Place in Hanover Square. Tiring of my fruitless Quest for secret Passages, I sought the open fresh Air, SbE having approached somewhat closely during the last Exchange. Found that an excited Dr S was gesticulating wildly (not his Fault, poor Fellow; doubtless the heating Effect of high Intellect on a Frame of foreign Breeding). And indeed, his Find, a Tomb in the Yard, was fairly Remarkable. The Inscription read “Alice Hargreave d 1673. Green Christ Have Mercy On Her”. No more Proof was needed that we had found a Place where Philosophy had been at Work.

On the other Side of the Yard a barred Gate led into a Builder’s Yard or some such. Its Lock was no Match for the Teutonic tinkering of Dr S. Bold SG ventured through to reconnoitre. On his Return he reported Three menacing Individuals seen beyond, along a Road. Leaving my Card upon the Altar, we departed. SbE kindly gave me an Item of Jewellery, to Protect against Curses occasioned by this. We then waited upon Events.

Some Days passed. Then, in the Course of my Promenade towards Kent’s I met Two of the lupine Ones in the Green Park; Dame Alice, and her companion Boyes. Following the Introductions and Politesse, a more trenchant Exchange with SbE was rudely interrupted. Six stout Fellows burst forth from the Bushes, armed to the Teeth. The Wolves made themselves scarce in a Twinkling. My Companions, I need hardly add, were made of sterner Stuff. SbE pistolled one Ruffian, and a meleé ensued; I gave SG a Knife of mine which he wielded with great Enthusiasm, running down One fleeing Miscreant and effecting a Citizen’s Arrest. Some few of the Others offered Violence to the good Dr S, to be surprised by a quite extraordinary Response, as that Gentleman wielded the Electric Fluid in his Defence. I had heard that it was Chiefly of use in the Cure of Warts, but evidently his Research has bettered this. Interestingly, the Corpse of his Attacker did, on later Inspection, prove to be entirely Wart free. One escaped, but we took Three of them Prisoner. These Footpads proved on interrogation to be actually attempting the Murder of myself, a Plot hatched in Ware Court, off Red Lion Street in Whitechapel. The Three Prisoners, Michael Ryan, John Napper and Taff Jones, all being examined, I had the Creature Napper bought before me in my full official Costume. I found him a Recidivist at First, attempting to mock the Laws of England by such Pranks as mouthing silent Abuse. Upon further Persuasion, when interviewed more informally, he swore an Affadavit incriminating the true Author of the Plot, one Dogberry, a known tool of the evil dog-cultist Wakefield. These small Fish were then suffered to depart the Town for Good.

Some little Time thereafter we returned to the Chapel in Spital Square. We found Dame Alice here, and did I think reach some Level of Understanding. That Place is some form of Gate or Passage between Realms, and her Task, aided by her Creatures, is to guard it from the Unwary. The loathsome Wakefield has of Late attempted to seduce her Servitors to his own Ends, with a Degree of Success. Thus, we have determined that the canine Powers are Anything but united at W’s Command, and should we make an Attempt to bridle his Malevolence, she, their Commander, would be at least a neutral Party. It remains to take Counsel with SbE and fellow Members as to our next Action.

May 1636

Saturday, May 1, 1736.

At One this Morning, and at Noon the preceeding Day, was a terrible Earthquake along the Ochil-hills in Scotland, which rent several Houses, and put the People to flight, it was accompanied with a great Noise under Ground.

Tuesday, May 4, 1736.

At a Court of Aldermen hld at Guildhall, Denn Hammond, Esq; an eminent Attorney in Nicholas Lane, was sworn Comptroller of this City, purchasing the Place for 3,600 l.

The House of Mr Wakefield a Silversmith attacked in broad Daylight by an armed Gang. Untroubled by a Yard full of fierce Dogs the Intruders gained Entrance through the Kitchen and Rear of the House. Though Servants put up a stout Defence, some giving their own Lives in defending their Master’s Property. The Intruders then used Powder Charges in vain Attempt to uncover Mr Wakefield’s riches, buried, they imagined, in his Cellars. It was only when Mr Wakefield’s fiecest Hounds were released that the murderous Bandits were driven off. During and after the Attack his Wife and Children barricaded themselves in the upper Floors and refused to descend for Fear of the Dogs running wild Below, until Mr Wakefield returned to exert his Authority over the Beasts.

Wednesday, May 5, 1736.

His Majesty went to the House of Peers, and gave the Royal Assent to the Bill for Exhibiting a Bill for Naturalising the Princess of Wales. — To the Geneva Bill. — To a Bill for Better Enlightening the City of London. — To several Road Bills, — And other private Bills, to the Number of 41.

Monday, May 10, 1736.

Receiv’d Sentence of Death, Stephen Collard for stealing a Silver Watch, George Ward, for robbing Mr Gibson a baker at Islington, Tho. Tarlton for Horse stealing, Daniel Malden for stealing a Silver Tankard, Jos. Glanwin for stealing 12 Handkerchiefs, Chris. Freeman for setting Fire to the Bell-Inn in Warwick Lane. Collard and Glanwin were repriev’d for Transportation.

Monday, May 17, 1736.

One Hundred Felons convict walk’d from Newgate to Blackfriars, then went in a close Lighter on Board a Ship at Blackwall. Though Five of them being Gentlemen of Distinction went to Blackwall in 2 Hackney Coaches and were accommodat’d with the Captain’s Cabbin, which they stor’d with plenty of Provisions &c. for their Voyage and Travels.

T E N Guineas in Bright Sovereigns S H A L L be a B O U N T Y paid to Bold and Stout-Hearted Bullies, handy with Musket and Sword. Enquire at the sign of the Laughing Dog, Shadwell.

Society Transactions, Item Nº 115.

Wakefield’s Cellar

A confidential Report by Mr ben Ezra

Gentlemen

As you know, there are those of this Society who have long voiced Concerns regarding the Activities of Mr Serious Wakefield. After recent Revelations concerning his dabbling with Werewolves and the Attack he orchestrated against Lord Foppingham in St James’ Park, my Companions (Messrs Church, Elmhill, Godwin and the Baron) and I came to the View that the Time for direct Action against Wakefield was now come. So determined, we sought means to enter his Abode to find his secret Place of philosophical Endeavour and there do what we could to thwart his Plans and undermine those Schemes of Canine (and Lupine) domination through which he seeks to advance his malign Influence over our City.

By the diligent Observations of Church and Elmhill we discovered a potential Entrance to his House through a Sewer. Selecting a Time of Day when we were confident Wakefield would be at his Shop in the Strand, we took this noisome Passage to the Foundations of his House. There we encountered a Series of warded Doors. The Second of these provided a significant Barrier requiring either a lengthy Ritual or the application of much Force, the Clamour of which we were unwilling to chance, to overcome. However, we noticed the Egress of a Jakes just outside this Door. Stealing ourselves against the Stench and Squalor of our Task we climbed this be-shitten Way into what transpired to be a Closet in the Corner of the Yard where the Dogs were kept. It was as we were making Attempts to calm the Dogs that we were discovered by the Housekeeper.

The time for Stealth being Past, we ran pell-mell into the House. Doubtless in the Aftermath there were those of us that regretted our Roughness with the serving Staff, but we felt we could brook no Resistance at this Juncture if our Venture were to Prosper. Brushing aside their Efforts to prevent us, we made our way down to the Sub-Basement. There we found Wakefield’s Laboratory. In it were caged a Man and several Wolves. The Walls were lined with Jars, many made in the Shape of Dogs and a Cabinet at the far end.

Elmhill, first into the Room, was assaulted by a skeletal Dog, which together we dislodged from his Throat with significant destruction of its corporeal Substance. Noting that the underlying Sorcery that animated the devilish Dog was impelling it to reform, Elmhill concentrated on preventing this. I set about my Task of Destruction, breaking Pots, thus liberating Dozens of Wakefield’s canine Spies around the City. Young Godwin was prevailed upon to set aside the elderly and hysterical Housekeeper, upon whose Person he seemed oddly fixated, long enough to discharge his Blunderbuss with great Effect against the Cabinet at the far End of the Room, while the Baron set about freeing the Man in the Cage.

As we progressed our Mayhem I became aware of dark Shadows growing in the Corners of the Room. Something was manifesting itself in the Room, something ancient, powerful and immensely dangerous. Realising the need for Dispatch, I called for Jack Church and his Grenadoes. Before he could arrive, one of the Beasts fully manifested. A sleek black Hound it was, that appeared to possess only two Dimensions. It launched itself like a Knife through the Air at the unfortunate Person of the Man just then liberated from a Cage by the Deutscher Baron, ripping out his beating Heart in an Instant. As I stood transfixed by this Vision of Horror I heard a Cry of Warning behind me from Church as a Grenado sailed into the room. I needed no further urging to Depart and with Elmhill hurriedly made my Way out of the Door. The Baron bravely turned to face the Beast with his curious dischargeable Sword which shot a bolt of electrical Fluid at the Beast, to little or no Effect. It simply turned its Body as if to present its missing Dimension to the Threat.

A second Grenado from Church caused some Panic amongst us by rebounding out of the Room amongst us but Church kept his Head and kicked it back into the Room, as the last Man, the Baron, exited, slamming the Door shut. Two muffled Explosions swiftly ensued, as we rushed up the Stairs. Unfortunately we found our Way significantly impeded by young Godwin who was still encumbered by his unaccountable Attachment to the Housekeeper. Turning back I observed the chilling Sight of an unnaturally Slim, black Muzzle nosing around the closed Door Jamb. Lacking any alternative I evoked the Sephiroth directly and cast a Ward upon the Door. This appeared to contain the Creatures and we departed with all dispatch, congratulating ourselves on a Job well done. “When Man makes plans, God laughs,” as my people are wont to observe.

We posted Observers, before we left and we were most gratified by Wakefield’s Reaction when he returned post-haste with a Mob of burly Apprentices. His apparent Concern for his Basement, above the Welfare of his Family and Household, seemed to confirm our View of him as a callous Individual obsessed with his Schemes and the Power they granted him over his Fellows.

We anticipated that his next Move would be to try to identify and take Action against those who had struck so effectively at the Heart of his Power. We sought therefore to rob him of his chief Agent in the commissioning of Mischief around the city. Having had dealings with Dogberry before, I had taken Measures to ensure that he would be not be able to elude me for long. The Man who had organised Two Attacks in broad Daylight on Lord Foppingham found himself waylaid in a London Alley by myself and Godwin. We took him to a privy Place to discover what he knew. We had a Plan thereafter to put him on a Ship Outward bound for the Baltic to cool his Heels a while. However, the Tale he told us caused us to relent on that Part of our Scheme, for it would have granted him Assistance that we felt he did not Merit.

Dogberry’s Tale confirmed that we had indeed struck a telling Blow against Wakefield. His Plans were unravelling; he had lost his Dogs; most of the Werewolves were Dead or had deserted him and Something was loose in his Basement. Unfortunately, whatever had got loose in the Attack was seemingly a Threat not only to Wakefield but to the whole of London. Wakefield he said was seriously rattled and was seeking hard Men and desperate Remedies. The cowardly Dogberry was sufficiently convinced of the Threat that he was planning to leave Town immediately. As if to confirm Dogberry’s Tale our Attention was drawn, shortly afterwards, by a trusted Source, to a series of sinister disappearances from Night-Shelters and the Rookeries – Places in the Deeps of our City where the poorer Sort congregate.

So it would seem that Wakefield has woken Something ancient and inimical in his dabbling with Powers that are not mete for Man. However, it appears that at least some of Wakefield’s Schemes were intended to contain a wider Threat. My Researches suggest that the Two-dimensional Creatures that we observed may have been the Hounds of Tindloss, there are only obscure References to them but they are known both as the “Guardians of the Bounds”, and “Servants of the Many Angled Ones” so whether they are the Threat themselves that Wakefield so clearly fears, its Harbinger, or Part of his Defences I could not say.

So in striking at Wakefield it seems we have disrupted his Efforts to contain a Situation that severely threatens this City. It is beyond Doubt that the chief Architect of this Pass is Wakefield himself. However, I feel I cannot in all Conscience deny my own culpability in escalating this Peril, no Matter how unwittingly. I think the Time has come for a Dialogue with Wakefield to establish the true Nature of the Threat and see whether we cannot work together to avert Whatever looms over our fair City.

From the Reminiscences of Baron Albrecht von Stoβenknopf

Mayday Madness and Spring Love Blossoms

I was pleased to see just the other Week, that for the Englishman, Love is not Dead. Also, it occurs in the most strangest of Circumstances, as you shall see.

The Setting for this Tale of Love at first Sight was a rather grand House in Conduit St. A House that the Mr Church has personally reviewed and appraised as being a worthy Place.

Within a fashionable Crossbow-Shot’s reach of Foppingham’s Hanover Square residence, Jack Church, the equally handy Jezzer and myself sortie the back Streets and insert ourselves in to Lover’s Lane. Ja, it appears to you to be just a dark Culvert populated by Vagrants, but we know this is the Way to greater romantic Things to come.

Other Lovers giggle on their Way, the Night Watch… doesn’t. The Bars to the Love Nest are loosened and all is set.

The knowledgable of our Group retires to Foppingham’s where the remarkably generous Simon has laid on a Feast of a Breakfast fit for, well, a Lord! Obviously with the Expectation of a great Deal of Expenditure of Effort we eat heartily from Simon’s Larder. It is only when Jezzer appears with News that W— has left for the Morning that we tear ourselves away from a rather splendid Morning’s Repast.

Armed with a Blunderbuss bearing the Arms of Lord F— himself, our dandy Fellow is soon escorted to the rear Entrance prepared the previous Evening. A somewhat difficult low Passage with a Ledge on either Side leads to a more sturdily decked Passage leading to the Rear of W—’s Cellars.

The “Do Not Enter” Sign on the Door stops us not longer than a Maiden’s Cries of no, no! and it quickly yields to the removal of its Hinges. A Second Door, this more cleverly warded and bound only serves to detour our Party though an unlikely Route. Upwards! up though the Hole in the Roof, which appears to be a small Closet, in the back Yard of the Love Nest.

Out into the Courtyard, I charm the first Wolf that is roaming there, and encourage them into the Kennels with the aid of ben Ezra. The successful corralling of the Hounds heralded the arrival in to the Courtyard [of a] Kitchen Wench [who] sees us, and runs off screaming.

I believe her vocal Talents were the initial Reason that Simon’s Heartstrings were tugged, and the penning up of the Rest of the Wolfs and bashing of the other Servants must have passed in a foggy Glaze as in the Kitchen they meet at Last.

Before Love can blossom, the Vision of Loveliness is felled by a Blow from One of our Number. They say true Love overcomes all Obstacles and the young Simon put it to the Test, grabbing his Beloved in the Middle of the Fight and dragging her off with him like a Sack of Turnips.

While Church secures the Door, Jezzer gets attacked by a skeletal Dog, which almost rips his Throat out. We run down the Spiral Stairs to the Basement, and the thunk-thunk of Simon dragging his now-inseparable Sweetheart behind him follow us.

Suffice to say, Grenades, Blunderbuss, smashing and Mayhem are visited on the protected Room. Two-dimensional Dogs slither from the Room’s Corners and are held only by some masterful Conjurations from ben Ezra.

But these are mere Distractions to a Fondness that has grown so Strong that, even though One of the soon-to-be-betrothed Couple is Unconscious with a serious cranial Fracture, Man cannot now separate them. Hauling his deadweight Maiden up the Spiral Staircase, Simon refuses to leave her to her Fate.

Some People say Love is Blind, but I think that is a Bit short Sighted, and it is only when his Friends rally around him and persuade him that she really isn’t the Woman for him (whether this is because her recumbent Form is blocking the main Exit Route or there is a genuine Feeling that her near Corpse State is going to count against her in social Circles, is unclear).

There really is little Other to Note, other than a Man’s Heart was broken that Night, a young Love was snuffed out like a Candle, and the congealed Blood of a gaping Head Wound takes Ages to remove from the best Cotton Shirts.

A Confidential Note circulated to the Members in good Standing of the Society for Effectual Redress

Mr ben Ezra reports upon:

A Conversation with Mr Serious Wakefield

Today I spoke at Length with Mr Serious Wakefield. We met in Monk’s Coffee Shop on The Strand. Each took precautions to ensure that we would not be the Victim of some Ambuscade or foul Play at the Hands of the Other. No Devilry was planned by either Party and our Parley proceeded, if not cordially, then perfectly civilly.

I put to Wakefield my Surmise – viz that he had stirred some nameless Dread in the Depths of the City, that he had been for some Time attempting to contain said Horror and that he now found himself without the Means to continue this Struggle. He could only admit that such was indeed the Case. He further confirmed my Hypothesis that this was the Outcome of some Endeavour to harness Arcane Powers in the Service of squalid, vainglorious Ambition. It seems that he has been contending with the Result of his Folly for some Twenty Years or so. I suppose that it is somewhat to his Credit that he has accepted this Burden as his just Portion – rather than simply fleeing the City and leaving it to the Fate he had brought upon it. He has been hunting out this Horror and keeping at Bay using Packs of ensorcelled Dogs and latterly Werewolves, along with various other Creatures – some like the Hounds of Tindalos almost as perilous to this World as the Threat he seeks to avert.

He seems remarkably ignorant regarding the Origin and Nature of the Threat he has loosed upon the City – perhaps indicating a Lack of underlying Knowledge to his undoubted Powers as a practical Philosopher. He knows only how it manifests: Piles of Ordure that move; Flies that speak; malign Wills that manifest via Mirrors. Unless I mistake my Guess, I would warrant that in his blundering he has opened some Kind of Gateway to what my People call the “First Creation” – that which GOD made before HE created the World we know. GOD looked upon his First Creation and found it not Good and shut it off from Eternity. Its Peoples are inimical to Man who they hate and envy for their relative Proximity to the LORD. They constantly seek to break into our World and can be conjured by those with Skill but lacking in Sense or Moral Fibre. More commonly they find their Way through by the unwitting Agency of wise Fools and their careless Meddling. Those who have followed my Accounts over the Years will have noted the References to Denizens from these Realms – Geburim and Clippoth – who have been encountered in this City of Late.

His Plan, such as it be, is to hire a Band of strong, desperate and stupid Men, arm and protect them as well as his Arts allow, and, with the Remainder of his Dogs to sniff these Things out, lead them on a Forlorn Hope into the Deeps of the City to see what might then be done. This Plan, though Crude, does indeed seem the Best to be done under the Circumstances – and despite all we know of Wakefield, One must applaud his Resolution in attempting it. However, I doubt that he will succeed alone.

I have committed to accompany him in this Endeavour. I also undertook to enquire amongst Society Members for Others of strong Kidney, prepared to meet Creatures of ineffable Evil on equal Terms with Steel and Shot, who would be willing to join this Venture which, while undoubtedly Perilous, represents the best Chance of preventing a Catastrophe like to swallow us all.

In addition I would ask all Members with Skill in such Matters – whether or not they are willing attend in Person – to render Work on the Weaponry of those who are to go so that it may have Virtue in striking the Unnatural. Such Protections as can be devised by them against unnatural Creatures will also be most welcome to those risking their Lives directly. I would also anticipate the need for a Quantity of Powder, Men to carry it and Skills to set a Charge, for I believe that there may be a Physical Breach to seal. Equally a Quantity of Bricks and the Men to set them is like to be of Value in the Event we manage to put a temporary Seal on the Place.

A final Note of Warning. It is clear that while Wakefield is undoubtedly keen to enlist our Aid in this Matter he is most Tenacious in holding onto his Grudges. In Particular he singles out Lord Foppingham and Jack Church in his Malice – and mayhap myself, for he smoked my Involvement in the Raid on his Basement. He has agreed to set aside all Enmity for the Purposes of this mutual Venture. We shook on it and I believe that his Word is his Bond. However, I would not rely on any Camaraderie to persist beyond the Business in Hand and we should beware the Aftermath of this Affair – should there be One for any of us.

June 1736

Society Transactions, Item Nº 121.

Mr Solomon ben Ezra reports upon the Society’s Role in the Survival of London

Into The Pit

Gentlemen of the Society

It is with great Satisfaction that I announce the successful Culmination of our critical Venture to descend to the Vale of Hinom and there seal the Entrance by which the Denizens of that foul Realm have been leaking into London in recent Weeks, causing widespread Death and Destruction amongst the poorer sorts and spreading foul Corruption around our fair City.

Five Society Members presented themselves at the appointed Hour at the Laughing Dog: Mr Belbury Fox, Rev James Munro, young Master Simon Goodwin (representing Lord Foppingham who had a pressing Engagement with his Tailor – again), Jack Church and myself. We came well prepared and equipped by the combined Arts of many Society Members. Indeed, I would take this Opportunity to thank all those Members who offered us their Assistance in this and other important Ways. Without your Aid we might well have faltered. At the Tavern, our small but doughty Fellowship encountered a Group of a Score or so stout Fellows gathered by Wakefield. When we all were assembled we followed Wakefield through London to a Warehouse in the Shadwell area. From thence he led us through secret underground Ways unto the very depths of Hell.

Our Victory was not achieved without Incident or Loss. The Task of those assembled was to secure the Mouth of the Tunnel as it entered the Vale of Hinom and hold it while a Pair of military Engineers, hired by Wakefield, set Charges to seal the Breach between our World and the Abyss. Though sore beset by all manner of foul Creatures of the First Creation, by a Combination of sound Preparation, stalwart Defiance and in some Cases sheer good Fortune we kept them at Bay. Some of us barely escaped with our Lives and some not at all.

Chief amongst the Casualties was Wakefield himself. When the Battle was at its hottest, one of his Conjurations went badly Awry. In that Moment Anubis, the Dog-headed God of the Ægyptians himself, appeared to claim his Soul and Body for his own. Thus did Mr Serious Wakefield meet his End. The Occurrence was not without its Irony, for it was by my own machinations that he had been brought to that Deity’s hostile Attention (see Society Transactions No 93). In that Moment I felt much as if I had been hoist by mine own Petard, for the loss of Wakefield came at a critical Juncture as two mighty Geburim strode down the Valley to join the Fray. To worsen Matters his Conjuration was not so botched that he had not contrived to summon forth a Hound of Tindalos – one of those terrible Two-dimensional Hounds he kept in his Basement. Without his guiding Will it seemed unlikely that it would seek to be our Friend.

Yet we did not flinch nor give way to Panic. Holding hard to our Task we eventually took down the Geburim, though with significant Casualties amongst the Bravos hired by Wakefield. When the Signal came from the Sappers only Two Threats remained: a vast Behemoth – I have no name for it – which at that Moment completed its defeat and consumption of an equally large Clippoth – and Wakefield’s Hound which was now fully manifest and seeking Prey.

We headed with Dispatch for the Tunnel Mouth to avoid entrapment in the Abyss. In the Confusion of the Fight we had become somewhat dispersed and some were more Distant from the Exit than others. There were Three Bravos who had been rendered insensible by the Agency of a Geburith that had, in expiring, fallen upon them. It did not sit at all well with Mr Belbury Fox, that gallant Gentleman, to abandon any Comrade to their Fate. Heedless of his own Safety, he made haste to come to their Aid. Though his honourable Instincts were beyond Reproach, it was clear to me that alone his Cause was hopeless. There was no Possibility that he could revive our Three Comrades and reach the Entrance before the explosive Charges did their Work. Reasoning that by my Arts I might still find some Means to win us all free, I realised that I could not in all Conscience do other than lend my Assistance. In an Instant my Mind was set and I followed Mr Fox past the beckoning Exit towards our fallen Comrades.

A mere Brace of Paces beyond the Passageway I nearly met my End. Throughout, I had been most cognisant of the Danger posed by Wakefield’s feral Hound that was lurking in the Vicinity of the Tunnel Mouth. Now I realised it had disappeared entirely from my Vision. Gentlemen, may I advise you: if a Hound of Tindalos is suddenly removed from your View, you may be sure that your Life is Forfeit, for it is presenting to you its Razor Edge. In Seconds you will find yourself neatly bisected with your pulsating Heart held in its Two-dimensional Maw.

It was at this Juncture that young Goodwin showed his Mettle. This fine young Man had discharged his Blunderbuss earlier in the Engagement. Yet, with a coolness rare in One so youthful, he had taken the Time and Effort to reload his Piece – resolutely ignoring the Mayhem around him – using a Charge that had been prepared by myself to be specially efficacious against the Denizens of the First Creation. Thus it was, when the Hound turned its invisible Attention upon myself, Goodwin was able to discharge at its thusly exposed Flank. The Blast caught it amidships and blew it to Tatters, removing a deadly Threat to us all and saving your humble Correspondent from almost certain Death.

When the Charges ignited, all surviving Members of our Party had won the Exit but for myself, Fox and the Three oblivious Bravos. Fox and I laboured to free our Comrades but it was clear that before we could finish our Work we would be forced to deal with our final Opponent – the Great Behemoth. As it approached we sprang up as One, with determination if little Hope in our Hearts, to see what Ill we could deal it before it overcame us. Once more Fortune was on our Side. The Creature had taken great Damages from its fratricidal Struggle with the Clippoth and contrived to trip and fall into one of the many Cracks, Craters and Fissures that adorned the vile and barren Landscape of the Vale of Hinom, right at our very Feet. Seizing our Opportunity Fox and I rained such a welter of Blows upon it that it was unable to rise and so we slew our last Opponent.

All that remained to us was to contrive a way Home. Fortunately, as those who regularly peruse these Accounts will be aware, I have some Experience of Travel between Realms. After a short Hiatus during which I was obliged to use my Skills to revive one of the Bravos – since Two cannot carry Three – I was able to open us a Portal into the Sephiroth whence we were able to return direct to my Parlour.

However, my Account is not quite over. On my Return I was able to perceive that all of us carried some Taint of the Underworld, a Corruption which if left to do its Work might wreak untold Damage both to ourselves and to all with whom we might subsequently encounter. Thus while we might have thwarted the Invasion of our City from the Abyss by main Force, yet there remained the Threat of a more subtle Subversion. I immediately called for a Messenger to take a Note of Hand with all dispatch to Wakefield’s Warehouse, bidding all there to stay in situ and await my arrival. Meanwhile I set about the ritual cleansing of the Five of us there.

This necessary Precaution took some Hours and I was greatly afeared that by the Time I could win there the Party would have grown impatient and departed. Indeed, it appears that my Concern was entirely justified. Had it not been for stupendous feats of Oratory, Persuasion and doubtless (familiar with his proselytising Methods as I am) physical Intimidation from the Reverend Munro they would have long dispersed before I arrived. I found a most dismal and disgruntled Crew, for not only had they been subjected to a Surfeit of haranguing Sermons from the Preacher, but they were all greatly alarmed that with the Demise of their Patron they had no means of securing their promised Payment. I was able to soothe their Fears on this Account by purchasing their Contracts at Face Value – generously waiving my normal Fee in recognition of our Comradeship. This now renders me a significant Creditor of the Wakefield Estate. The troubled Waters of their Ire thus calmed by soothing Oil of Lucre, they acquiesced as I went about my Business, ritually cleansing them all of Taint and Corruption.

Meanwhile, a Gang of skilled Bricklayers obtained by Jack Church set about sealing the collapsed Tunnel with specially devised Bricks that should pose a most effective Barrier to any Attempt by the Denizens of that awful Realm to reopen the Way.

As I draw my Account towards a Close, there is One last Matter for the Members’ Attention. This same Corruption I noted on those who had been in close Contact with the Abyss, is also to be found in many of the low Dives and Rookeries of our City where the Beasts of the First Creation have been feasting on the Poor of our City in recent Weeks. May I entreat those Members with Skill in these Matters to seek out these Places and undertake such Endeavours as they may to cleanse them of this Taint. By so doing we may avert much potential for future Evil. I am happy to enter into closer Discourse with such Gentlemen as may be interested in undertaking this good Work.

In Conclusion I would like to say a few valedictory Remarks regarding Mr Serious Wakefield. He was in many Ways an disagreeable, vengeful and arrogant Man, a dabbler in Matters that imperilled his fellow Citizens and no Friend to this Society. However, I think we should recognise in Death that he also had his Virtues and was, at least to some Extent, misunderstood by us all (not least by myself). We should respect the Bravery and the stubborn Heart that caused him over Decades to seek to redress the Evil he had once committed, and Honour the ultimate Sacrifice he made in giving his Life to that Cause.

Your Humble Servant
Solomon ben Ezra

Tuesday, June 1, 1736.

One Anne Boynton of Old Henstridge in Somersetsh. was delivered of 3 Daughters and one son ;  one of the Daughters died, the rest like to live. The Woman has been married but 4 Years, and lain in 3 Times, at first she had 2 Female Children, at the second 2 Male, the third 4 as above.

Monday, 7 June, 1736.

The Grand Jury for the County of Middlesex found a Bill of Indictment against James Bayley and Tho. Reynolds, on the Black Act, for going arm’d and disguis’d, and cutting down Ledbury Turnpike.

Saturday, 12 June, 1736.

The Sessions ended at the Old Bailey, when 75 Prisoners were try’d, of which 38 cast for Transportation, 1 burnt in the Hand, and George Watson condemned for the Murder of a Watchman, and 35 acquitted.

Monday, 14 June, 1736

Daniel Malden broke (a second time) out of Newgate, by sawing his Chains near the Staple, by which they were fix’d to the Floor of the Condemn’d Hold, and getting thro’ the Brickwork dropt into the Common Sewer ;  several Persons were employ’d to search after him, but to no Purpose, tho’ the Chains about him weigh’d near 100 Pounds : They found the Bodies of two Persons, who trying to escape had been smothered.

Thursday, 17 June, 1736

Capt. Porteous, of the City-Guard, Edinburgh, received a Copy of his Indictment in which he is charged with the Murder of 6 Persons, and wounding 11.

Wednesday, 30 June, 1736.

A Receipt for a New DRAM and a New PUNCH, far more wholesome and pleasant than any with distill’d Liquors.
Squeeze 4 Sevil Oranges (or 2 Oranges and 2 Lemons as you like best) into a Quart of fair Water, sweeten it with fine Sugar to your Liking, and then put to it a Pint of Sack, to be drank as Punch, or bottled and us’d as a Dram. And a most delicate, fine, pleasant and wholesome Liquor it is.—The Reason why Sack is best for this new Punch and Dram, is, because of all Wines, none contains more Spirit than Sack  ;  more Ounces of a high exalted Spirit being by Chymistry drawn from a small Quantity of Sack than from any other Wine, and this it is makes Sack or Canary Wine, the only next (undistill’d) Liquor that can supply Spiritous Liquors in Punch.
This New Punch is not only vastly pleasant, but is far more wholesome than Punch made of any distill’d inflaming Liquors, which by their Heat parch and shrivel up the Coats of the Stomach, burn the Lungs, and destroy by their violent Burning the friendly natural Warmth within us, and so become the Ruin of the Constitution ;  which makes Dr Cheyne and other Physicians call Spirituous Liquors a Slow Poyson, and even in Punch, Poison disguised  : But whenever Sack is adulterated, it is by having Brandy, or Spirits, mix’d with it, so the more it is adulterated, and consequently the worse Sack is according to the common Estimation, the better by far it is or this use, having more of the Brandy and strong Spirits in it.

Society Transactions No. 127, June 1736.

An Account from Mr Solomon ben Ezra

The Widow Elder

It all began with the vile Assault upon the Eerson of our esteemed Secretary Mr Berry by a Parcel of the foulest Rogues our City, replete with such, could spawn. It was most fortunate that the Event took place not far from Kent’s and was witnessed at its commencement by Messrs Church, Goodwin and your humble Correspondent. We rushed to Mr Berry’s Aid and so fuelled by righteous Rage were we, that within Minutes Two of the Varlets were lying wheezing in the Gutter, one had fled and the fourth had left his Kidneys on the Point of young Goodwin’s Hanger.

We had the survivors arrested and brought before the Magistrate. One received a whipping, the other was sent to Newgate to await trial and probable transportation. Realising that this had been no chance encounter with footpads we set about interrogating this latter in his place of incarceration. Though unwilling to talk at first, by dint of promising to withdraw charges (reasoning that it was well worth tossing back a minnow to catch a bigger fish) we prevailed upon him to reveal the identity of their sponsor.

Society Members will already be familiar with the Widow Elder, a notorious and prolific vector for the malefic influence of Gin in our city. The subject of a high profile Society action earlier in the year, it appears that her intent was to deliver a harsh and brutal message to the Society that she would brook no further interference from us in her affairs. Needless to say, her rude and precipitate action had the opposite effect and outraged by her effrontery we set our minds to returning her message with interest.

At first we bethought ourselves of some direct action of the sort that had caused her ire at the Society in the first instance. However, reasoning that perhaps it might not entirely be to the credit of this August Body to be associated with another incident involving the Mob and the Militia, we set ourselves to the consideration of revenge of a subtler sort.

Thus it was we set about finding out more of the Widow Elder and her business. Despite her wicked trade it appears that she herself at least maintains the appearance of sober propriety. She is a regular attender at Church and a generous patron of a hospice for the victims of the French Pox. However, on direct scrutiny I was shocked to discover that the woman was more than a mere physical transactor of the Gin trade. Keen readers of my accounts may recall the affair of Captain Speke’s Easy Gin Palace and the exorcism I was forced to undertake to rid the place of the malign spectre of “Mother Gin ”. It was clear to my trained eye that this self-same spirit was haunted the corpus of Widow Elder.

I felt it my duty, whatever other motives I had, to rid the lady of this evil spirit – for who knows under what duress she was operating due to its influence. It was an easy thing to conjure a charm that would drive the spirit from her. The more difficult would be to induce her to don such a charm. We bethought ourselves of the two brothers who were apparently vying for her charms some months back and it occurred to us that she might be vulnerable to the influences of Venus. Being sufficiently self-aware to understand that my Judean wit, wisdom and aquiline profile is not to the taste of every woman – especially those of a church-going disposition, I quickly came to the view that I would not be the ideal medium here and the less said about Jack Church in such a context the better. However, in Master Goodwin we had at our disposal the very epitome of a widow’s dream – young, fresh-faced, innocent yet keen, inexperienced but vigorous, handsome and wholesome.

I will draw a veil over the ensuing detail, which is scarcely an appropriate matter for discussion even in such enlightened society as this. Suffice it to say that Mr Goodwin succeeded in his endeavour to such an extent that he was able to place the charm – a bracelet – around her wrist. Subsequent observation has confirmed that it proved efficacious and, at least for the time-being, the spirit of Mother Gin has departed her – though what outcome may eventuate from that is yet to be seen.

While Master Goodwin was so occupying the attentions of Widow Elder, I took my opportunity to examine her books and was able to achieve a good understanding of her business, her suppliers and distributors.

This initial distraction satisfactorily complete we set about pursuing the main part of our business with Widow Elder, for as might be observed, we had to date in no way taught her the lesson we intended – viz  : that the Society was not to be threatened by her and that the person of our Secretary (or indeed that of any office bearer or member) was not to be assaulted with impunity. In fact it might be argued that we had actually done her naught but good by furnishing her with the attentions of a handsome swain and ridding her of an evil spirit.

The main part of our plan saw myself and Church enter clandestinely within the Elder distillery. Church efficiently dealt with the watchmen while I carried out an ambitious ritual – made more arduous by the interference once more of the malign spirit of Mother Gin – to render impotent and sterile the still and the gin within it.

If the ritual has proceeded to my intent it will render sterile and impotent the still and all the Gin in her distillery. Though the Gin may carry the same sensory pleasures – such as they may be – it will in no sense intoxicate the consumer. It is our calculation that when it becomes apparent that Elder’s Gin fails to deliver the advertised oblivion, their reputation as distillers will be destroyed and with it Widow Elder’s insidious business, that wreaks such havoc upon our City. Doubtless her place will be taken by other such vermin in due course, but there may be opportunities to shepherd at least some of her custom to less egregious habits. Mr Berry has the details of her distribution chain.

Lastly I would like publicly to offer my sincerest regrets to Mr Church who was inadvertently caught in the ambit of my ritual. Gentlemen (and indeed Ladies) of sensibility will be happy to know that the effect is temporary and unlikely to last more than a few months, whereupon the member’s member (as it were) will doubtless return to its previous vigour. In the meantime I would urge you all to accord Mr Church both the admiration and sympathy that you would to any fellow who has received injury while pursuing the interests of our Society.

A List of Deaths for June 1736

June 3. Mrs Deakins, at Dartford, Kent. She had lost the Use of her Limbs for some Time and was advis’d to be Sweated in a Horse-Dunghill, where she continued 2 Hours an a half but fainting was taken out Dead.

June 14. Mr Pugh, Bag Bearer to the Sheriffs of London , of the Wounds he receiv’d from the Mob at the last Execution at Tyburn.

June 20. Major Darby, at Hammersmith, of a Mortification occasion’d by cutting a Corn.

Monthly B I L L of Mortality from May 25 to June 22.

Christned	Males Females	581 554	1135
Buried	Males Females	1028 1038	2066
Died under 2 Years old		752
Between 2 and 5		194
Between 5 and 10		76
Between 10 and 20		85
Between 20 and 30		167
Between 30 and 40		196
Between 40 and 50		191
Between 50 and 60		170
Between 60 and 70		115
Between 70 and 80		85
Between 80 and 90		33
Between 90 and 100		2

Advertisement

At Edial, near Litchfield in Staffordshire, Young Gentlemen are Boarded, and Taught the Latin and Greek Languages by

Samuel Johnson

July 1736

Saturday, 3 July, 1736

One Ereskin a Quaker made a 2d solemn Progress thro’ Edinburgh, crying, The great and terrible Day of the LORD is coming!

Sunday, 4 July, 1736

The Godolphin, Capt. Steward, arriv’d at Spithead from the East-Indies, and brought Advice that the Purser and Surgeon of the said Ship being walking near bengal, a Tyger seiz’d and carry’d off the latter, Mr Sedgwick  : And the Auselme Capt. Derby, of 30 Guns and 90 Men, going from Bombay to Tellicherry in a Calm, was attack’d by a Number of Grabs, Row-Boats, and 800 Men belonging to Angria the Indian Pyrate ;  and after a desperate Fight, wherein she lost 30 Hands and spent all her Powder, she was boarded and carry’d off, having some Ladies and Gentlemen Passengers on Board, and a Quantity of Silver.

Monday, 5 July 1736.

From the beginning of the Month, we had such continued Rain, the like not known in ye Memory of Man ;  Insomuch that all the low Meadows in ye Kingdom were about this Time floated, and the Hay, Corn, and Grass thereon carry’d away, or spoil’d. Some Bridges and Mills gave way, and the Damage done almost incredible. In the Parish of Tingwick, Oxfordshire, a large Tract of Earth computed at about 6,000 Loads, with a Hedge and several Large Trees thereon, was carry’d by the Violence of the Torrent a-cross the Chanel of the River, by which Means the Current was entirely stopp’d, and the Meadows floated for many a Mile.

George Watson a Smuggler was hang’d at Tyburn and dyed without shewing any Concern.

Wednesday, 14 July, 1736

A large Paper Parcel was discovered under the Seat of the Councellors in the Cour of Chancery, Westminster-hall, then sitting, which being kick’d down the Steps, it blew up, and put all present in the utmost Confusion. A large Quantity of Bills was by the Explosion scatter’d about the Hall, giving Notice, that this Day, being the last Day of Term, the 5 following Acts (impudently and treasonably call’d Libels ) would be burnt in Westminster-hall, at the Royal-Exchange, and on St Margaret’s-Hill, Southwark, between the Hours of 12 and 2. The Gin Act was call’d, an Act to prevent the Sale of distill’d Liquors. The Mortmain Act (the Act for taking away the little remains of Charity. ) The Westminster Bridge Act ;  (the Act to prevent People passing over London -Bridge. ) The Smugglers Act; (the Act to prevent innocent Gentlemen travelling armed. ) And the Act or borrowing 600,000 l. on the Sinking Fund had the last Words chang’d into the Sacred Fund, and the Expression Foreign Prince added. A great Blast at High Holburn rained fire on the area and obscured all with choaking smoak. The Petard seemingly miscarried on a runaway Wagon. The Driver being lost its Destination remains unknown ;  save that no Event occurred this Day at the Royal Exchange. Several Persons of Note and some obscure across London, Westminster and Southwark also receiv’d Packages of similar Bills that variously combusted or exploded close after their delivery causing Alarm, Injury and Death.

Thursday, 15 July 1736.

Her Majesty in Council order’d the Parliament to be farther prorog’d to the 14th of October

At a Court of Common-Council at Guildhall, a Report of the Commitee of City Lands was read, setting forth what Money had been expended in filling up Fleet Ditch, &C. also shewing what farther was necessary for erecting the New intended Market, which in all amounted to 10,265 l. 17s. 10d. half-penny. In this Market is to be a Recess, capable of containing 100 Country Carts, 218 Shops and Stall, and a large Market House 252 Feet in Length, and 44 in Breadth.

Society Transactions No. 134, July 1736

A Near Miss

As witness’d by Mr ben Ezra

Society Members were no doubt shocked, as indeed were all London ers, at the recent atrocities visited upon our city. However, I draw your attention in particular to the cart which exploded in the midst of High Holborn. That was all the more terrible because it appeared so random in the devastation it wrought. Random it was indeed, for that was not its target. Its target, Ladies and Gentlemen of the Society, was Kent’s.

Shortly before the Outrages took Place, it had come to the Notice of One of our Members, the good Doctor von Stoβenknopf, that there was an unusual Shortage of the Chemical Substance Phosphorus, which he uses in his Laboratory, throughout the City. Considering this somewhat odd he undertook to discover the Reason for this sudden Impecunity in the Market and enlisted the Aid of fellow Society Members, viz myself and the Rev Munro, to assist him in the Endeavour.

Our best Guides in this proved to be our Noses, Phosphorus having a most distinctive Stench. Our olfactory Senses led us to a Warehouse by the River in Westminster where Quantities of Phosphorus were clearly being stockpiled. It was the Doctor’s View that the only use for the Substance in that Concentration must be the manufacture of Explosives.

We noted the proliferation of Scots at the Warehouse and this led us to the Hypothesis that this might be a den of Jacobites intent on Wrongdoing. Sharing the Ethnicity, if not the Religion, of these Fellows, Munro had little difficulty in insinuating himself amongst them in their drink-sodden Revels of an Evening. However, though he could confirm their general Sentiments were as we had suspected, they were either more close-Lipped under the Influence of strong Drink than is the general Fashion of their Countrymen, or they genuinely knew Nothing of Import. He was nevertheless given the Name of a Man, one Stevens, to meet on the Morrow who would give him a Job – a Job that portended Mischief of some Kind.

Alas, that we did not act then and there and confront these Rascals in their Den. However, we were but Three and they were many and it would have taken much time to roust out the Society. So it was we turned to the Law. Milord Foppingham once more taking the Waters in Bath and Mr Fielding indisposed, we dealt with Sir Thomas de Veil instead. He proved to be of more cautious Kidney than we had hoped. Rather than commit men to the Venture he asked us to return and report once we had attended the Rendezvous with Stevens.

On the Evening things went slightly Awry – and there are more Parts to this Tale than my own, which I will leave to my Companions to relate. For my Part, I was in my customary Guise for such occasions of an old Sea Captain so that I could watch Munro’s Encounter and pursue Stevens as he departed. This I did, hoping that my Fellows would catch me up. However, entirely by Chance, while I was following him, my Path was crossed by a Wagon bearing the distinctive Reek of Phosphorus. Upon the Instant I resolved to change my Mission. Pausing only to purloin a Handkerchief from Mr Stevens so that I might locate him again, I set off in pursuit of the Cart.

This took me on a lengthy Journey through Streets of London just as Dawn was breaking. It was as we approached the Aldwych that a Presentiment came upon me that were I to be going to Kent’s this would be the very Route I would take. Seized with Alarm, I put on a Turn of Speed to be able to see the Drivers of the Wagon more clearly. The Carter himself was non-descript but beside him was a Woman who I instantly recognised as the Companion and Maid of Widow Elder. I realised that the final Turn that would lead them to Kent’s was upon us and I knew I had to Act. The Horse pulling the Rig was no doubt a well-trained and biddable draught Beast but there is no Creature upon this Earth (I discount entirely the scurrilous Tales of Milord Foppingham’s detractors) that can well withstand a stout oaken Staff thrust hard into the very Centre of its Fundament. The Nag reared and bucked and started in its agonised Response. Its Dismay was compounded by the discharge of a Blunderbuss as the Cart’s Riders were thrown clear. Thus it was revealed that the Driver had been acting under the duress of a hidden Piece directed at his middle Parts. As the Cart thundered off to its eventual Doom in High Holborn I seized hold of the young Lady with the intention of bringing her to Kent’s and encouraging her there to confess her Erongdoing and identify her Principals. However, as soon as I laid Hand upon her I realised that here was a Woman animated by a Strength that was far more formidable than her Frame would suggest for she fought back with little less than demonic Energy.

I was extremely grateful that I was in Guise for I believe that, such is the common Prejudice against my People, Passers-by would have had little tolerance for a Jewish Man wrestling an apparently Christian Woman in the Street. As it goes it would seem that they are inured to the Sight of such violence being committed by seafaring Gentlemen. Though None sought to assist me I was not hindered as with some difficulty I overcame the Harridan and bore her unconscious Body to Kent’s.

When I came to examine her, my Suspicions were confirmed. The Maid was under the malign Influence of Mother Gin. This is not to say that she was Drunk – this was a deliberate Possession by the same Entity that I have described more than Once in my Expositions to the Society, most recently in the matter of Widow Elder herself. It seems that she had been merely a Tool in the hands of Others, and had indeed been intent upon wreaking Destruction upon Kent’s.

I set about using my Arts to both restore her to her Wits and to discover what I could about those who had used her so. I was somewhat obstructed by the fact that once she was free of her Possession she had no Memory that she could easily access of her Exploits. However, I was able to extract a Name – Chandwick – and a Method used to ensorcel the poor Creature. It seems that Chandwick has access to the sorts of Sorcery that I believe are common in the Caribes. There I understand that Rum is used as a Medium to induce Spirits to invest a Person and bend them to the Sorceror’s Will. Here I believe we are looking at a local Version based instead upon Gin. I do not believe that Chandwick himself is the Adept but clearly commissions the Services of those who are. In addition we may surmise that Chandwick has some connection to the Jacobite, else how would he know of their Plans. Yet he can only be using them as a means to his own Ends, which I suspect to be entirely to be bound up in the pernicious Gin Trade.

Fellow Members, we have a new Enemy, and a very deadly one at that.

Saturday, 17 July 1736

A Proclamation by the Queen and Council, was publish’d offering a Reward of 200 l. to any Person who should discover the Author, Printer of Publisher, of the sandalous Libel dispers’d in Westminster-Hall, and charging all his Majesty’s Judges, Justices, &c. to put the Laws in Execution, especially those good ones made last Session, which were so scandalously misrepresented and reflected on.

Tuesday, 20 July 1736.

The Jury at Edinburgh found Capt Porteous guilty of Murder, whereupon the Lords sentenc’d him to be executed in the Grass-Market upon the 8th of Sept. next. The Verdict was as follows; viz. ‘  That the said John Porteous, fired a Gun among the People assembled at the Place of Execution and Time libelled ; as also, that he gave orders to the Soldiers under his Command to fire, and upon his and their so firing, the Persons mentioned in the Indictment were killed and wounded. And find it proven, that he and his Guard were attacked and beat by several Stones of considerable Bigness, thrown among them by the Multitude, whereby several of the Soldiers were bruised and wounded. ’

Thursday, 22 July 1736.

The Sessions ended at the Old-Bailey, where 54 Prisoners were tried, of whom 24 were cast for Transportation, 23 acquitted, and 7 Capitally convicted, viz. Tho Mills for stealing a Horse value 12 l. Jn Mackworth, alias Perry, alias Parliament Jack, for House-breaking ;  Thomas Rickets for stealing a Silver hilted Sword ;  Jn Kelsey, for robbing the Cirencester Coach at Hyde Park Corner  ;  Stephen Phillips, for Horse stealing ;  Tho Morris, and Jn Pritchard, for House-breaking.

Monday, 26 July 1736.

One Reynolds, a Turnpike Leveller, condemn’d with with Bayley on the 10th (on the Act against going arm’d and disguised) was hang’d at Tyburn. He was cut down by the Executioner as usual, but as the Coffin was fast’ning he thrust back the Lid, upon which the Executioner would have tyed him up again, but the Mob prevented it, and carried hin to a House where he vomited three Pints of Blood, but on giving him a Glass of Wine, he died. Bayley was repriev’d.

Saturday, 31 July 1736

In the Daily Advertiser, July 28, Joshua Ward, Esq; having the Queen’s Leave, recites 7 extraordinary Cases of Persons which were cured by him, and examined before her Majesty June 7. Objections had been made, in the Grub-street Journal, June 24. But the Attention of the Publick has been a little taken off from the Wonder-working Mr Ward, to a strolling Woman, now at Epsom, who called herself Crazy Sally ;  and had performed Cures in Bone-setting to Admiration, and occasion’d so great a resort, that the Town offered her 100 Guineas to continue there a year.

Society Transactions No. 142, July 1736

A Correspondence from Mr J— C—

At Mrs M—’s Amusement

Sir,

In awaiting the further Denouement of the Affair of the Widow Elder’s distilling of poor London Gin our Attention, as Members of the Society, has been drawn to the potential Role of a Supplier to the same.

He is a certain Mr Chandwick. This prosperous and well mannered Gentleman with both a large Farmhouse on the Outskirts of London and a Warehouse by the Thames at Shadwell from which, it is suggested, Spirits may be distributed to major Customers in the City and possibly further afield. We have peaceably observed him, together with a Clerk or some-such, visiting his Shadwell Property from Time to Time, normally by means of Coach and Four.

The Warehouse Building is of distinct Quality – recently rebuilt and proffering a most uncompromising fortress-like Exterior beyond that which is common even in the storage of the more valuable merchant Goods. There is even among the poorer riverside Folk something of a forbidding Reputation which may give the Superstitious pause before contemplating any more detailed Approach to its exterior or an Attempt to investigate its Interior.

In order to get to know this Gentlemen more directly Mrs H— M—, a recently joined Member of the Society and renowned Actress, was persuaded to invite the same to an Amusement at her Residence. Her Husband, also of theatrical bent, invited a number of Patrons and other Persons of Quality, Resource and Mind to sponsor a popular Entertainment. Mrs M— agreed to invite Mr Chandwick to her Amusement on the same Pretext. Also present were Actors and Actresses of Mr M—’s Company: cozens to whom the moneyed Patrons have, from Time to Time, been drawn.

At this we were fortunate to be able to engage both Mr Chandwick in discussion and also his Clerk the lantern-jawed Mr Barbe. Of significant Note was that Mr Barbe appears to be a highly numerate Individual for whom no Discussion is complete without piling Quantity upon Quantity. Also in their Company we were surprised to observe one Captain Speake. Society Members had previously passed Time with this nautical Gentleman and the following Day we resolved to discuss his new Associates more immediately and to learn what we could.

With the assistance of a likely Crew Captain Speake was persuaded to accompany us for further Discussion. Chief among Subjects put to this Bird-witted Sailor was his surprising re-appearance in London. Adopting a previous disguise with which Captain Speake was only too familiar Mr B— E— was able to put some pointed Questions to the Sea Dog which he was quick to Answer.

It turned that, following a destructive Affair in the Islington Brickyards [subject of an earlier confidential Report to the Society] he had taken his Ship and searched out a likely Commission to take him to the far Seas. His new Employer was none but the now presumed Supplier to Widow Elder. In this Commission Speake had sailed to and even beyond the far Isles of the Caribbean. Reaching a mis-begotten Shore he had been taken by Chandwick to a Location where some two dozen Cases were awaiting Collection. Captain Speake further described his and his Crew’s surprise at the emergence from under the Cases of the Clerk Barbe. Speake described the Fear and Trepidation of his Crew at this weird Encounter and, further, that Barbe was able to talk persuasively to his Crew so that, despite their Misgivings, they agreed to let Barbe and his Boxes return to London on board Speake’s vessel.

B— E— renewed his Commandment to Speake to depart this City and not return. Whether this Instruction shall be any more than hot Breath wasted we shall see in the coming Months. In the meantime we retain Chandwick and Barbe under close observation.

I remain, your servant,

J— C—

August 1736

E P I G R A M. To a beautiful Vixen.

When you’re angry, dear Molly, what a terrour I’m under?
For your voice (as I always expect it) is thunder.
When pleasant, you always your light’nings display,
And your eyes flash upon me much keener than day!
Since a victim I’m doom’d,’tis equal to me,
If the bolt, or the blaze, must set the soul free.
— W. Love-Wit

Sunday, 1 August, 1736.

Mobs arose in Southwark, Lambeth and Tyburn Road, and took it upon’em to interrogate People whether they were for the English or the Irish ? Several Parties of Horse Grenadiers dispers’d the Mobs which were gathering in Ratcliffe-Highway, to demolish the Houses of the Irish.

This and 2 or 3 following Nights, a great Mob rose in Shoreditch and Spittlefields, occasioned by some Irish Labourers and Weavers working at under Rates. They cry’d Down with the Irishmen, broke the Windows where they lodged, and almost demolis’d two publick Houses kept by Irishmen  ; one in Brick-lane, in defence of which some Fire-Arms were discharg’d, which killed a young Man and wounded 7 or 8. The Justices, Constables and Trained Bands not being able to quell’em, a Party of House and Foot Soldiers were call’d in, on which and the committing 6 or 7 to Prison, they became quiet. — A like Tumult happen’d a few Days before, at Dartford in Kent, on the same Occasion, which could not be appeased till the Irish Labourers were discharged, and some of the Rioters who had been apprehended, were released.

Monday, 2 August, 1736.

The first Stone was laid of a new Building at St Bartholomew’s Hospital, which is to contain 12 Wards ;  it is to be of the same Dimensions as the first Side already built of Bath stone, and 2 more are to be added on the East and West. The Workmen found at the Depth of 20 Feet, 60 or 70 Pieces of old silver Coin, the Bigness of Three-pences.

A very extraordinary Cause was try’d at Hertford Assizes, on an Action brought against the Defendant for debauching the Plaintiff’s Daughter, (both Persons of Fortune,) and having a Child by her under Marriage Promises. A special Jury gave her 150 l. Damages, and directed her to bring an action in her own Right upon a Marriage Contract.

Thursday, 5 August, 1736.

A great Cause was tried at Chelmsford, Essex, between Sir John Eyles, Bart. Plaintiff, and John Smart, Gamekeeper to the Hon. Edward Carteret, Esq; Defendant. The Action was brought for shooting 3 Hunting-Dogs. The Defendant justified that the Dogs being in pursuit of the Deer in his Master’s Park, and very near killing some of them ;  he did not maliciously but for the preservation of the said Deer shoot the Dogs ;  which the Judge seem’d to admit as lawful ;  but the Jury (being Gentlemen) in regard to the Game Laws brought in a Verdict for the Plaintiff, and a Guinea and a half Damages. The Judge declared that if a new Tryal was moved for, he would certify in Behalf of the Defendant.

Tuesday, 10 August, 1736.

Four Malefactors were hang’d at Tyburn, viz. Tho. Mills and S. Phillips, for Horse-stealing ;  John Maxwerth alias Parliament Jack for Burglary; John Kolsey for robbing the Cirencester Coach. Mills declar’d just before he was turn’d off, that he was not guilty of the Fact.

Monday, 16 August, 1736.

Mr Nixon, a Nonjuring Clergyman of the County of Norfolk, was committed to Newgate by the Secretaries of State, on a charge on Oath of his being Author of a scandalous Libel fix’d up at the Royal Exchange. We see this further Account in one of the Publick Papers, viz. Doctor Gaylord, a Printer, one of Rayner’s Journeymen, and formerly a Prisoner on Account of Mist’s Journal, hath made Oath, That he, together with one Clark, another Printer not yet taken, did compose from a manuscript Copy, written by Mr Nixon, the Libel dispersed in Westminster -Hall, the 14th of July last, at the House of said Mr Nixon in Hatton-Garden, and the said original Copy has been found by the Messengers.’Tis believed Mr Nixon had a Premium given him by a private Collection ;  but however it be,’twill cost him dear.

Tuesday, 24 August, 1736.

A fatter Boar was hardly ever seen than one taken up this Day, coming out of Fleet Ditch into the Thames: It prov’d to be a Butcher’s, near Smithfield Bars, who had mist him 5 Months, all which Time, it seems, he had been in the common Sewer, and was improv’d in Price from 10 s. to 2 Guineas.

Wednesday, 25 August, 1736.

Came on 2 remarkable Trials at Rochester, one of a Fellow for ravishing a Woman upwards of 60 : The other of a Soldier who pretended to cure a Boy of an Ague, and thinking to fright it away, by firing his Piece over the Boy’s Head, levell’d it too low, and shot his Brains out. The Ravisher was cast, the Soldier acquitted.

Thursday, 26 August, 1736.

On the humble Petition of several Magistrates and Citizens of Edinburgh, her Majesty was pleas’d to reprieve Captain Porteous for 6 Weeks.

Tuesday, 31 August, 1736.

The Cures performed by the Woman Bonesetter of Epsom, are too many to be enumerated : Her Bandages are extraordinary neat, and her Dexterity in reducing Dislocations and setting of fractured Bones wonderful. She has cured Persons who have been above 20 Years disabled, and has given incredible Relief in the most difficult cases. The Lame came daily to her, and she got a great deal of Money, Persons of Quality who attended her Operations making her Presents. Her Father it seems is one Wallin a Bonesetter in Wilts. The Money she got procured her a Husband ; but he did not stay with her above a Fortnight, and then went off with 100 Guineas.

Copied to Society Archives

A Letter from Mr Solomon ben Ezra

A Letter from Mr Solomon ben Ezra

A Gesture of Goodwill

Dear Mr Pointer

The Sight of an unruly Mob armed with Firelocks, Blades and Barrels of Gunpowder is not an unfamiliar one to my People. However, this is not Cracow, Madrid or indeed Dublin. This is London where Men are fair-minded and rational and the Rule of Law holds sway. The Law is clear that Burglary and Affray are not the way for civilised Gentlemen to address their Differences. I confess myself to be most disappointed by your importunate and violent Comportment.

Whatever your Quarrel, real or imagined, with me, a far better Course for resolving such Difference as you perceive between us, would have been a Note of Hand to Kent’s outlining your Concerns and seeking a Meeting. We are well acquainted and have combined together on a Number of previous Occasions to our Common Advantage. I would most assuredly have listened intently to your Arguments and done my Utmost to accommodate you.

The Manner of your Approach has done nothing to encourage my Co-operation – and I had no Intention of staying at Home to make Acquaintance with your Irish Bravos when you called. Nevertheless, I have since your Visit given considerable Thought to the possible Motives for your intemperate Assault upon my Property. I remain at a complete Loss and it has caused me to consider the Possibility that some third Party, perhaps an Enemy of mine or my Society, has poisoned your Mind against me by whispering Falsehoods into your Ear. If this be the Case, I find it a great Disappointment that your good Opinion of me could be so influenced. I am also troubled that your Society could be so manipulated as to deploy its considerable Resources against a proven Ally to further the hidden Agendas of Others. I would advise you to examine carefully the Provenance of any Informations against me and consider anew what Motives there might be hidden within.

Despite your unlawful Assault open myself and my Community, I remain willing to seek Accommodation with you. If there is any Substance to your Accusations let me hear them and I will do all that I may to make Amends and satisfy your Requirements.

To this Letter I append an Accounting of all the Damages done to Life and Property. This is an honest Accounting, well witnessed, that simply seeks Redress for the Ill done to myself and my Neighbours by your Action. As a Gesture of Goodwill I include no punitive Demands, simply a Reparation at Cost. However, I fear I must make the Payment of this Account a Precursor to any further positive Discourse between us. If you demur, I am afraid it will be my Duty as a Citizen to approach a Magistrate with Witnesses to swear an Information against you for Burglary and Affray.

It remains my sincerest Hope that this Affair between us may yet be brought to an amicable Conclusion.

Your humble servant

Mr Solomon ben Ezra

Society Transactions No. 154, August 1736

A Report by Mr James T Kirk

A Recent Discovery in London Subterranean

Sir,

With fellow Members Mr M—, and Mr B— E— and myself, Lord F— chose to investigate a disturbing Report of disappearance at an east London Brewery. Lord F— had been approached by a Boy regarding the same and, as a Magistrate, felt bound to examine the Case further. We took Coach to the Brewery and, on interrogating the Brewery Manager and his Men, it seemed that the Brew had Twice been Foxed and that, the Night previously, Two Watchmen left to secure the Place had disappeared. The Place was recently improved and supplied by Two Wells, One modern but One more ancient. We chose to examine the more Ancient which allowed access to those Streams below Ground supplying the Well.

In our investigations we encountered a Creature of monstrous Squid-like Proportions. But worse than any Squid it appeared to have Mouths at the end of its tremendous tentacular Extensions – which could themselves move with great rapidity causing our Complement to move off down divers Sewers to evade its attempted Embrace. Such Excitement did not sit well with Society Members present as the Creature was as ordureous as it was unfashionable. Ordinary Boots and Weapons seemed to rebound ineffectually against its Carcass and we were fortunate to have Assistance in their sharpening by Mr B— E— who had prepared us for such an Encounter. Its great Size initially seemed to suggest we would struggle to overwhelm the Beast. However, Mr B— E— was able to secure some Handle to a gigantic Plug or similar and with some Effort pulled this sending the Cephalopod down into the further Depths. Hopefully the resultant Vortex has returned it to whence it came and we may pray that it might not return.

Exploring the now vacated Lair of the Beast we concluded it had denned in an ancient House of Prayer dedicated – others suggested – to Cloacina, libidinous Roman Goddess of Sewers. We were fortunate to have a brief Period to examine this Structure before ingress of Water (and other Material) filled the Bowl-like Room in which the Creature had lain. As a Consequence we were able to return to the Brewery well set including with the Bones of the Two missing Watchmen. These poor Souls were apparent Victims of the Creature and Lord F— declared both Case and Well closed to prevent further Accident.

Yours in confidence

James T. Kirk

Society Transactions No. 155, August 1736

A Communication from Lord Foppingham

To the Rescue of the Ditch Ale

Monday, 8th August 1736.

To Kent’s, where I was interrupted at my Coffee by a Fellow humbly desiring my Attention. Evidently a Tradesman of the middling Sort, he sported a stained Apron. Both as a Society Member and a Magistrate, I find myself in full agreement with that Fellow of the last Age who averred that we should “resemble a Privy, being open in Time of Need”, so I invited him to continue.

He named himself to me as Mr Perkin Sydney, the Landlord of the Cock and Bull Tavern in Phoenix Street. He spoke with some warmth of the Aid recently given him by other Members of our Society, but hvg been unable to find Mr Darkin, put his Problem before me.

Sydney, by Custom, was supplied with his Beer from the renowned local Brewery, the York Street Brewery in Shoreditch. Their “Ditch Ale ” was, I heard, much in demand among the thirsty Customers of the Cock and Bull. That Supply had, in late Days, been cut off in the Wake of an unlooked for Series of failed Brews. This Phenomenon is not remarkable in these hot August days, but the failure (“foxing”, as Mr Sydney pithily described it) had affected both the Brew in the Tuns, and all the stored Beer; a Thing quite unheard of. Even more suspicious, Two of the Brewery Watchmen had absented themselves and were yet missing. It seemed that my Informant was privy to more Details of the Affair than the Brewery, as a confidant of the usual Watchman’s good Wife. I was informed that Old Jem the Watchman had seen a ghostly Figure, which had disappeared down the old Well. Tragically, this good Fellow had imparted this Intelligence to her alone, and the next Night, with only a young Lad to stand with him, had prepared to exert himself in Defence of his Master’s Property. The sad Tale unfolded as I suspected it would. The next Day, the Day Shift arrived at the Brewery to find the Gates locked and the Two Men gone. When it was told to me that, by Repute, one could hear Things down that old Well, I needed to hear no more. We of the Society must surely do what we can to support the Efforts of any who make Honest Brews if we are to have Beer, the wholesome Englishman’s drink, triumph over the despicable Geneva.

To hunt such Game as I suspected, I called upon some of our stoutest fellow Members; that notable Sword of the Lord and of Gideon the Rev’d Munro, the omnicompetent Mr James Kirke, and of course, Mr Solomon ben Ezra, with whose formidable Learning my fellow Members will doubtless be cognisant.

The very Day following, I arrived at the Brewery and interviewed the Brewmaster, a Mr Lancaster. This worthy, initially somewhat surprised by my arrival, made no Difficulty, and we duly inspected the Locale. The Men were employed in a great scouring of the Vats. Our Enquiries soon reached the old Well; now disused but still protected by a wooden Cover. As it was lifted, that Man gave a terrible Cry, and gibbered of a “Hand” visible below. Knowing all too well what lay ahead, I had the Workmen sent outside and we prepared to venture below.

As we made this Excursion, Mr ben Ezra had been paying close Attention to the Brewery site. What he found pleased him not; a widespread Infestation of the eldritch Sickness that we have encountered before where Things from the first Creation have been unleashed. These “Flowers of the Vale of Hanom ” had spread their invisible Evil to the Well cover and even the Woodpile in the Yard. One at least, he reported, of the Workers was afflicted.

We ordered the People there into the upper Floors, while he once more did what was needful to erase the hellish Blooms. A Stratagem became necessary in order discreetly to cleanse the People and the Place. To this end, I ordered the Brewery shut for a Day while I looked into the Matter of these Disappearances; by paying each Man individually his 6 d., in Lieu of Wages, Mr ben Ezra could evaluate them all to check that None was carrying the Taint. His prescriptions proving, as ever, efficacious, all were suffered to depart save Mr Lancaster and the Foreman Welsh.

These Two stood by to open the old Well Cover, once we had arranged Matters for our Descent. Sure enough, two disembodied Fore-Arms are revealed, clinging to the top Rung of the Ladder. We set forth directly; myself being lowered by Rope, with Mr Kirke free climbing beside. At the Base, we came to an open, larger Area. The Stream ran through it but sluggishly. As our Companions descended, we set off upstream, since this seemed to Source of a noticeable Fœtor, tainting the Water. A smaller Tunnel opened low down to the right, and then the main Passage forked, and began to climb.

Here the Tunnels had a smooth, oval Section almost like the Borings of some Worm. Rats were everywhere. Those with the Power to discern these Things told us that, bizarrely, these Rats had some small Auras about them, though they forbore to explain what this might mean. Those of us devoid of such Insights meanwhile set ourselves in the Front and pressed on, with Steel and Ball ready. As we struggled up the malodorous Tunnel, the Author of the Fouling arrived en scene and proceeded to assail us without further Ado. Another of these extraordinary fleshy Assemblages, this one like a giant Worm or Mass of Worms, as if some Exhibit from Dr Gardner’s excellent Worm Museum (not far away in Shoreditch High Street ) had grown to exceed a Fathom across. I emptied a Horse Pistol into it, which served to blow a front Section into smaller Worms that washed away down the Stream.

It seemed that a fellow Reptile, Twin to ours, had arrived in the other Fork of the Tunnel. But the Effect of my Shot so obviously reverberated to the other Side, that we could not but see that we dealt with one enormous Creature. We assaulted it on two Fronts, opposing Steel to many unpleasant Teeth. The Creature stretched itself out thin and tried to snare the Rev Munro, in the other Tunnel with Mr Kirke. That Worthy cut himself off a Length of Monster and found himself engaged on Two Fronts.

With no Warning, a Blow of great savagery from Rev’d Munro caused a Shudder to run through it and it retreated, precipitously. A great Rush of Water, I suppose dammed up behind it, roared out of the Darkness and all but washed me away. Mr Kirke, still struggling with his Collop of Monster, was swept off together with it and our remaining Light. I was left entirely in the Dark, with only the Torrent rushing past my (ruined) Boots. Taking this as a Guide, I retreated Downstream in search of my Fellows. En route, my outstretched Hands discerned a set of Stairs leading up. Once reunited, we determined to explore this new Avenue. An old, wooden Door at the head of these stairs gave, at a Push, and beyond lay a small Chamber out of which another such Door lay. This in turn gave onto a great Chamber beyond, with a pillared Gallery surrounded a large Chamber, not unlike a Theatre. In the central Pit, a huge Mass of Worm lay, writhing. Here at last was the Source of our Worm, but in such Quantity that our Blades would be of no Worth.

As ever, we were fortunate to be able to fall back on the Wiles of Mr Solomon ben Ezra, and to this End, departed. My Flask (emptied of its customary Cognac ) made a good enough Catch-pot for a small Worm. We retreated for a Space to the Surface, gathering more Lanterns. After an Interval of preparation, we returned to the Chamber, and with no more Ado the Creature was scotched. As the Waters returned, to form a Pool in the Centre, a Pair of ghastly skeletal Figures animated, for a space, by Worms. A brief Fusillade served to return them to the mere Bones of the Two missing Men.

There is little else to Report; save that I did all that was needful with the Middlesex Coroner, and had the old Well sealed with my personal Seal. The Brewery is now quite safe, but the Regions below may hold Risks for the foolish Venture, and I have sealed it lest another Night Watchman pay for his Diligence with his Life.

I remain, Sir,

&c, &c

The Blooms of Hinom

— An Addendum by Mr Solomon ben Ezra

Society Members will no doubt already be familiar with the recent Accounts offered up by Lord Foppingham and Mr Jack Church regarding our recent Venture into the cloacal Depths beneath Shoreditch. It seems somewhat redundant for me to pen a third Account. I shall instead, take this Opportunity to elucidate, for the Benefit of those in the Society who take an Interest in Matters Philosophical, on the Blooms of Hinom.

The Vale of Hinom is that part of the First Creation, that the LORD made and found to be not good, that is closest to our World, the Second Creation. It is a Place of extreme vileness, populated by malign and monstrous Creatures inimical to Mankind and the World we inhabit. Followers of these Accounts will recall my Report from earlier this Year (Society Transactions, Item Nº 121) when Members of this Society joined in an Expedition to that terrible Place. I will not trouble Members with a repetition of that Account – it lies in the Library should anyone wish to refresh their Recollection. However, I will remind the Ladies and Gentlemen of the Society of the Care and Trouble I took when we returned to cleanse all our Company of the Taint of that dreadful Land.

The Flowers of Hinom are the Manifestation of that Taint, which clings to the Persons of those who come into contact with the First Creation, much as Grass Seed clings to a Man who walks through a Summer Meadow. Moreover, it may be shed in much the same Way and brushed off on Others. Thus one Man who has had intercourse with the First Creation might spread that Taint around many Others who might in Turn pass it on quite unwittingly. It may also be left in a Place, just like Hayseed and picked up by a Passer-by. The effects of the Taint are many and varied but all will be detrimental to the Carrier. It might manifest as bad Luck, or an Ailment or a Sickness of the Mind or Spirit.

Fortunately, it is easily detected by those with Skill who take the Trouble to look for it. A simple Aura Reading will reveal it to the Adept, who will perceive it as Clusters of sickly red Blooms. It is as easily banished with an Exorcism, although such operations can be Time-consuming. I would adjure any who know themselves to have been in Contact with any unnatural Creatures, or who have Reason to believe that they are dealing with those who have, to make use of these Techniques to ensure they and their Companions remain free of this Taint.

Although thoroughly pernicious of themselves, the Flowers of the Vale of Hinom do have a value to those who set themselves to oppose such Forces as they represent. For they indicate a Trail which Anyone so skilled may follow that is sure to lead in the End to the Vector for the spread of the Blooms – such as the Creature uncovered by Lord Foppingham and his Company under Shoreditch. However, be warned such Creatures are seldom anything other than deadly dangerous, as those poor Watchmen might attest, were they not Dead. Members of the Society who undertake such perilous Hunts should bethink themselves to go appropriately armed – and should they overcome, remember to cleanse themselves afterwards lest they too become the Vector of these deadly Blooms.

September 1736

On the 28th past

On the 28th past, a Man passing the Bridge over the Savock near Preston saw two large Flights of Birds meet with such Rapidity that 180 of them fell to the Ground, were taken up by him, and sold in Preston -Market the same Day.

Society Transactions Nº 160, 1 September 1736

A report by Mr Solomon ben Ezra

A League of Gentlemen

Society Members will recall the Matter of the unprovoked Attack made upon my Premises by the Antaeus League some Month or so past. I shared my Response to that with the Society, since I felt it touched upon its Interests no less than on my own and my Neighbours. My Letter to Mr Pointer communicated both my Ire and my Disappointment that an erstwhile Ally should turn upon me without Warning or apparent Motive. I demanded an Apology and some monetary Recompense – more for my Neighbours than myself. Some Weeks later I received a choleric Response which offered no Remorse or Reflection – just Abuse aimed at myself, my Race and at Members of this Society whom he branded as “Meddlers” and “Popinjays” (a term which Milord Foppingham found peculiarly offensive), and taunted us at our lack of Royal Warrant, the which it claimed for the Antaeus Society.

I found this Response oddly intemperate, for while there might be a Hint of Menace about him, I had never observed Mr Pointer to be so crude or so lacking in Control as to waste his Energies on Spite. In the Meantime I had been working with One of my Neighbours, a Witness to the whole Event, whose Mind had been clouded by the Antaeus League with their “Thunderflashes”. I found the Effect they had created to be fairly straightforward Netzach “Cloud Memory” which with a little Effort I was able to dispel. The Testimony of my Neighbour added little to general Thrust of what I knew already but added a few Details. One that particularly struck me was the generally irate Comportment of Pointer and the intriguing Fact that his Accent disappeared when he lost Control of his Temper.

Thinking to engage Pointer more directly, we dispatched Milord’s Footman, young Goodwin to his Residence. He was not at Home, but using his now notorious Charms upon the Housekeeper, Doris, Goodwin was able to discover that Pointer had not been Home for over a Month. Putting together all the Evidence, it came to us that Pointer was not in fact Pointer at all, but an Imposter. The Antaeus League had been infiltrated – by whom and to what End was unclear – but it was manifestly compromised.

I will not recount in Detail what ensued for it is complex and I would not risk the Patience of my Audience with such a long Account, involving several hot Actions. During One of them we believe we encountered and slew the false Pointer – a Gentlemen who looked uncommon similar and who carried a Notebook containing many small intimate Details of Pointer’s Life and History. However, it became clear that the Antaeus League has become unaccustomedly active and that most liberal usage is being made of its Mind-clouding Techniques on the Streets of London, especially in the Area around Pointer’s house.

At the end of this Trail of Violence we finally encountered a Gentleman by the Name of Farnsworth who it seems is Representative of the “real” Antaeus League and who had come to suspect there was much amiss with his Society. After taking Counsel with him, we concluded that our next Step must be to locate and rescue Pointer, whom he has Reason to believe still lives. It may be that important Clues are locked in the Mind of Doris Williams, his House-keeper. From an initial Investigation it is clear that the poor Woman has been sadly ill-used and that “Cloud Minds” lie upon her like Layers of Scar Tissue. I am confident that I can restore her to her proper Wits, the only Question is whether I can do so speedily enough to bring timely Succour to Kelly Pointer. I shall keep the Society informed on Progress in this Matter.

In the Meantime I would caution any Society Member to be most circumspect in any Dealings with Members of the Antaeus League, and remain cognizant that Anyone with Links to them may not be in their correct Minds or indeed be quite another Person entire. It behoves us all to be aware of their Ability to tamper with Memories and be alert to the Way that false Memories planted in otherwise quite innocent Persons might be used to our Detriment.

Sunday, 3 September 1736

Joshua Harding, and John Vernham, condemn’d for House breaking, were hang’d at Bristol, when cut downm and put in Coffins, they came both to life ;  but the latter, tho’ he had been blooded, dy’d about 11 at Night ;  and Harding continuing alive, was put in Bridewell, where great Numbers of People resorted to see him: He said, he only remember’d his being at the Gallows, and knew nothing of Vernham’s being with him ;  having been always defective in his Intellects, he was not to be hang’d, but to be take care of in a Charity-House.

Society Transactions, Nº 161, 3 September 1736

A Communication from the Freiherr Doktorphilosophischundmechanisch Albrecht von Stoβenknopf

The Mechanicat

It is with Regret that I have not been Free to join the estimable Gentlemen of the Society in recent Weeks in Forays against the Troublemakers of London. However, I have not been Idle, but engrossed in my latest Project which is ready for further testing. Gentlemen, I will shortly disclose to you the Mechanicat, a self propelled feline-based mechanical Device which has some modest portage Ability. It can be controlled to an Extent by myself and has some basic Abilities to respond to external Stimuli.

After initial testing it was apparent that some better Methods of transferring the stored Energy of my everyday Clockwork Mechanisms to the movement Struts was required. My Experiments with various Animal Leg Motions led me to incorporate similar Structures within the Mechanicat. As Nature has had the advantage of Thousands of Years of Proof of Design, I am pleased to report that those Ideas were transferred successfully to the less natural Form.

I have one polished Prototype for display and testing in the Laboratory which I have left undisguised so that various internal Workings can be viewed. Based on the fleet-footed Cheetah favoured by the Roman Gods for hunting shown so well in Titian’s Bacchus and Ariadne looks aesthetically pleasing, and strong but not practical for deployment on the Streets of our City. I have captured its likeness in a Etching for you to admire.

Accordingly I have modified the Form to a shorter, smaller and more domesticated feline Appearance to blend in better. I have some more natural Coverings for Field use that will provide both visual and olfactory Disguise to some Extent. Fresh Skins will be required on a regular Basis and I am giving due consideration to a slightly more canine Variety of external Construction although the internal Machinations will remain largely unaffected.

I look forward, therefore to joining with you soon, and performing some testing of the Device, which I suppose should have a Name. As yet I cannot contemplate a suitable One and the Two usable Mechanicats I have, are designated “Tiddles ” and “Smokey ”. The former because I had difficulty in correcting a wandering Motion in the Gait of the Mechanicat which produced an Effect not dissimilar to that of a Drunkard and the latter due to some seized Bearings which gave off tinged Wisps of Smoke after prolonged use.

Tuesday, 7 September, 1736

Betwixt 9 and 10 at Night, a Body of Men, enter’d the West Port of Edinburgh, siezed the Drum, beat to Arms, and calling out, Here! All those who dare avenge innocent Blood! were instantly attended by a numerous Crowd. They then seized and shut up the City Gates, and posted Guards at each, to prevent Surprize by the King’s Forces, while another Detachment disarmed the City Guards, and advanced immediately to the Tolbooth or Prison, where not being able to break the Door with hammers &c. they set it on Fire, but at the same Time provided Water to keep the Flame within due Bounds. Before the outer Door was near burnt down several rush’d thro’ the Flames and oblig’d the Keeper to open the inner Door and going into Capt. Porteus Apartment, call’d, where is the Bugger Portous ? who said I’m here, what are you to do with me? To which he was answered, we are to carry you to the Place where you shed so much innocent Blood and Hang you. He made some Resistance, but was soon overcome, for while some set the whole Prisoners at Liberty, others caught him by the Legs and dragged him down the Stairs, and then led him to the Grass Market, where they agreed to Hang him without further Ceremony ;  accordingly, taking a Coil of Rope from a Shop, they put one End of it about his Neck, and flung the other End over a Dyers Cross Port or Gallows, and drew him up ;  but having got his hands to the Rope, they let him down and tyed them, and draw’d him up again, but observing what an indecent Sight he was without any Covering over his Face, they let him down a second Time, and pulled off one of the two Shirts he had on and wrapped it about his Head, and hal’d him up a third Time with a loud Huzza and a Ruff of the Drum. After he had hung until suppos’d to be dead, they nail’d the Rope to the Post, then formally saluting one another, grounded their Arms, and on t’other Ruff of the Drun retir’d out of Town. Nothing of this Kind was ever so bodly Attempted, or so successfully Executed, all in the space of two Hours, after which every Thing was quirt. The Magistrates endeavoured to prevent their Design, but were attack’d aand driven away. Next Moring at 4 when the Captain was taken down, his Neck was broke, his Arm wounded, and his Neck and Head bruised.

In what we mention’d last Month, with relation to the obtaining this unfortunate Man’s Reprieve, there was a small Mistake ;  several persons of Quality and Distinction, did apply to her Majesty, in favour of the Captian, but we are assur’d the Magistrates of Edinburgh did not in the least Interest themselves in that Matter ;  and no doubt they had their Reasons ;  since this is not the only Instance of the Populace of that City, putting into Action, the brave but unforgiving Principle, couch’d under the Motto of their Nation, Nemo me impune Lacessit

About 14 Persons wew taken into Custody the next Day on account of this Riot, but no Evidence appearing against them, 1 were soon dischar’d, and the others not long after.

Friday, 10 September, 1736.

A Fire broke out in upper Shadwell, by which 42 Houses, 6 Warehouses, and 8 Sheds were burnt to the Ground, and 18 damaged.

Wednesday, 15 September, 1736.

At Sessions at the Old-Bailey 77 Prisoners were tried, 6 of whom receiv’d Sentance of Death, (viz. ) Edward Bonner, a Butcher in Newgate-Market, Tho. Dwyer, and James Oneal, for robbing on the Highway ;  Edward Rowe for shooting and robbing Mr Gibson, the Baker at Islington  ;  John Thomas for Shoplifting ;  and Tho. Hornbrook for Horsestealing. 26 order’d for Transportation, one burnt in the Hand ;  and one (viz. ) Joseph Cady, to stand in the Pillory for Perjury ;  and 62 acquitted. Mr Nixon the Nonjuring Clergyman was admitted to Bail. Three Men and one Woman were committed for Perjury on Bonner’s Trial.

Nine Persons in Custody on occassion of the late Riots in Spital-fields were brought to the Bar, indicted for Misdemeanors ;  but their Trials not coming on, they were, with the Approbation of his Majesty’s Attorny General, referred to Bail, each to find Sureties to be bound in 50 l. Recognizance.

Society Transactions Nº 168, 15 September 1736

A Preliminary Report dictated, for reasons which will become apparent, by the Freiherr Doktorphilosophischundmechanisch Albrecht von Stoβenknopf, to his Servant, Igor.

Mr Pointer Enlarg’d

Leaving the leafy Surrounds of my Country House to venture in to the bustle and hustle of the City always fills me with a Sense of Trepidation. Things have a way of happening in London as in no other Place I know of. However, I felt Duty bound to offer my Services to the estimable Society Members, particularly ben Ezra, after reading of his most unfortunate Setbacks in recent Society Transactions with the Antaeus League.

I stopped off to acquire a Box of fine Cephalick Snuff and a box of Dr Henderson’s Pills from Fribourg & Treyer, Haymarket before meeting my estimable Fellows at Kent’s. At a private Booth, ben Ezra, Foppingham, the ferret-like Jezzer and I caught up with recent events and the Jew outlined his Thoughts on finding the real Mr Pointer. It was evident that Pointer’s Housekeeper, one Doris Williams, might supply the Whereabouts by leading us to him, ben Ezra’s skills at unlocking damaged and secretive Minds proving most useful at this Juncture.

At Pointer’s the ever popular Foppingham creates a fine Stir as ordinary Folk gather round to admire his latest Fashion, so much Commotion is generated that is with little difficulty that we gain entrance to Pointer’s relatively unnoticed. With Jezzer posted outside ready to tail any Leavers, Doris takes a moment to retrieve some Items from an upper Floor and hastily makes her departure. My inquisitive Nature leads me to investigate if there are other Clues to his Whereabouts in that Area, and indeed I do find and take into Safe Keeping an inscribed Gold Disk, a small Gold Boot-chain, and some Notes on the “Failure of Continuity ”.

Meanwhile the dutiful Doris was followed to none other than Prince Frederick’s house in Leicester Square, but is apprehended by Villains and ben Ezra will no doubt cover that incident elsewhere. Safe to say we gained a Prisoner and he was held at Foppingham’s private Oubliette, where I also deposited the Items held safe for the real Mr Pointer.

It is at this Point we entered a most strange and not entirely understood Dream sequence using ben Ezra’s not inconsiderable Mastery of Yesod. In this Dream-Trance we were challenged by Four Highwaymen demanding a Toll for crossing Lord Hypnos’s Realm. Naturally we pay them with Steel and Shot and continue through Gates of Ivory and thence a Curtain. Once more we repelled those who would dissuade us, Four skeletal Horsemen this time.

Finally we find the Man called Pointer and he sat us down to play Cards of all Things. The Rules were not explained, but Pointer in his almost delusional State rambles about Trumps, having One in the Hole and such like before we were suddenly interrupted and set upon by several yapping large perfumed Poodledogs. I have never had such an odd Experience though ben Ezra, obviously with Experience in these Matters, concludes that the Clues from Pointer’s Card Games would lead us to his Location. Spades, “One in the Hole”, a Card depicting a Woman filling a Vessel in a River reflecting a Star, a Queen or King, “cleaning us out” and perfumed poodles. The Location was deduced as Sally Master’s House of ill Repute where Pointer would be presumably held in a Cellar or Dungeon of Sorts.

Before we could organise Ourselves in that direction Foppingham is invited to meet with Johan Himmelkranst, Herr von Schuttenfest, and the Lord cordially invites him to Dinner on the Saturday night. A quiet Night it was not going to be though, as a Mob attacked Herr Schuttenfest’s Carriage almost outside Foppingham’s front Door. The Mob dispersed far too quickly when we ran out to confront them, and raised suspicions of a Diversion. Gathering a Footman, I headed down to the Kitchen to be faced with the frightening Figure of Foppingham’s Cook. She confirmed that indeed there had been Thumps and Demands for entry on the heavy Kitchen door Minutes earlier.

In search of Answers, and against the Wishes of the Cook, I unbolted the Door and only by my prepared Wits did I avoid a Blow which took the very Wig off my Head. The Rogue was rewarded with a full discharge from my Lightening Stick which left him prostrate and smoking. Seeing Four more charging towards me, a Retreat was called for and soon we had the Door closed and bolted and wedged with the large Kitchen Table.

Ignoring the abuse from the Cook about ruining Dinner, and leaving Foppingham to smooth his remaining Guest, I lead a Chase to the rear of the House to apprehend the would-be Intruders. Myself and Two Footmen bearing Torches, with ben Ezra reluctantly being pressed into Action on the Evening of his Day of Rest, encounter Jezzer, doing Whatever Jezzer does best.

The Smell of charred Villain was easy for me to follow and we catch them in an Alley, Two blocking the way while Two carry their Colleague. My Momentum carries me through their Barrier and into their midst where Jezzer and I set about the Four standing with Sword and Pistol while the Footmen lit the Scene with Torches held High. With admirable skill, Jezzer subdued one of the Curs with a Knife at the Throat and the Others scurry away leaving us Two Captives to take back to Foppingham’s.

Dinner Conversation involved Schuttenfest’s people wanting their Man back, and of course Foppingham conveyed that we would be happy to Report if we ever bumped into him. It was impressed that we were dealing with very serious People, though in my Opinion, I feared the Cook more!

Finally in a Week full of Adventure we ended up at Sally Masters’s with a scant Plan. Thinking I had a While to do a Bit of looking about before the Raid began I found the Corridor to the Water Closets. With my keen Eye I noticed a small Hatch, its Lock barely withstood my Gaze and I gained Entry to a Set of Stairs downward. Just as the Jew had predicted, a Cellar under the Brothel! Footprints in the soft earthy Flooring led me to a blank Wall where surely a Door was, but I could not see it.

As I had seen ben Ezra evoke previously to discover Objects hidden from Sight I considered it no large Matter to do the same here. As is often the way with first Attempts, Things did not quite work to Plan. Though I managed to illuminate a Doorway behind which Mr Kelly Pointer was held, the brightness was etched onto Everything, pure White, even my Being.

Mr Pointer, still not fully of sound Mind I suspect, was unwilling to depart with what he thought was a dead Baron, and requested that perhaps he would remain until Lord Foppingham led him out, just to be sure. Verily I did manage to be found by Foppingham and Others and my Recollections of Events thereafter were rather hampered by my continued Light blindness. Suffice to say that we returned to a Position of Safety with Pointer and additional Information gleaned by the equally inquisitive Jezzer. It is my Hope that Others will chronicle those Events I so that I may read them later when my Sight eventually returns.

Friday, 17 September, 1736.

The Court of Common Council, London, order’d that the 1st Collection of the Tax for lighting the Streets, pursuant to a late Act, should be for 3 Quarters of a Year ending at Christmas, after the following Rates (viz. ) Every House under 10 l. per Ann. 3 s. 6 d. from 10 to 20 l. 7 s. 6 d. from 20 to 30 l. 8s. from 30 to 40 l. 9 s. 6 d. all above 12 s.—Every Freeman of London liable to pay the said Rate, neglecting or refusing to pay, or desiring to be excused paying, shall be under the same Incapacity of Voting at all Elections in the City, as other Persons now are, who do not pay Scot and Lot.

The Glasgow Mail with several Bags and an Irish Mail therein, were carry’d off by two Rogues, who stabbed the Postman in the Thigh.

Society Transactions Nº 171, 19 September 1736

An interim Report from Mr Solomon ben Ezra.

The Search For Mr Pointer

Ladies and Gentlemen of the Society, allow me to present another interim Report on the Matter of the Antaeus League and the Disappearance of its lead Figure, Mr Kelly Pointer. Much has occurred over the past fortnight and I do not propose to recount it all at this Stage – particularly since it may touch upon the Interests and Reputation of a Very Important Personage, on which Subject I am reluctant to indulge in premature Speculation. I also note that my esteemed Colleague, Baron von Stossenkopf has penned his own Account covering some of these Matters. Thus I shall confine myself to the History of our Efforts to locate and rescue Mr Pointer.

Earlier Attepts to use philosophical Means to locate Pointer had come to Nought, leading us to the Conclusion that he was either dead or veiled from my View. The Testimony of Mr Farnsworth, a Member of the League who presented Himself to us as being a “Loyalist”, was that Pointer must perforce be alive since his Death would in some way evident to the League. Ergo Pointer was being held away from prying Eyes, such as mine.

Although I was confident that given Time I could break down the Veiling, I was less confident that we had the Time to spare and was concerned that were I to take such a direct Approach, it might alert his Captors to our Interest. I chose instead to seek our Quarry through Yesod, the Path of Dreams. I therefore prepared the Rituals to translate myself and my Companions, Milord Foppingham, Baron von Stossenkopf and Mr Elmhill, into Dreamland.

There we passed through a series of Adventures and Challenges, each in the ultimate Analysis, a Test of the Strength of our Dream. Finally we found ourselves in a Room with Pointer, in apparently antic Humour. By drawing us into a Card Game as chaotic as that in a Dream, he was able to furnish us with what we identified as a Series of cryptic Clues as to his Whereabouts in the living World. He provided cunning References to Spades as Trumps and an Ace in the Hole lead us to the conclusion that he was kept Underground. He also played the Star and the Aquifer and made Reference to the “Witch of the Waters”. Our Concourse was drawn to sudden End by an influx of Dogs: yapping, coutured, primped Poodles, who were able to overcome our Dream and cast us from Yesod.

In order for you to apprehend the Significance of the Clues I have recounted, I must take you back to an Incident which in the Interests of Brevity I omitted from my previous Account. In our earlier Researches our Attention had been drawn to one Mrs Sally Masters, who runs a bawdy House of the better Sort (if there be such a Thing) near Tower Hill. Lord Foppingham, staunch Guardian of public Morals, saw fit to raid her Establishment and arrest her. She revealed herself by her Attitude to be well-accustomed to the Attentions of Magistrates and was little daunted by them. It was also evident to me that she considered herself to be well-protected from my Arts – perhaps, I thought, by some Charm she had bought. Confident in her Protection in Law and Philosophy, she was most pert in her Answers to Lord Foppingham, facing him down in his own House.

I confess I saw Mrs Masters’ Intransigence as something of a Challenge. I sought to puncture her Composure by dispelling her Protection. I did not bargain for the extremity of her Reaction, for she immediately evoked Netzach. What she attempted, I do not know. I do not believe she was successful but no subtle Trick of the Path of Cunning was like to operate to her Advantage while she was swam for her Life in the Sea of Salt Water that began to pour into Lord Foppingham’s first-Floor Chamber – the inevitable outcome of an Evocation of Netzach. Somewhat chastened by this she became somewhat more helpful and did indeed provide us with the Name of Mr Farnsworth. We had much else to think on at the Time so when Order was restored Milord bestowed a judicial Wigging upon the bedraggled Woman and let her go her way with a Warning.

In light of this the Aquifer Card and Pointer’s rambling Reference to a “Water Witch” immediately brought Mrs Masters to our Minds, especially since we recalled that there was a Star featured prominently above the Door of her Establishment. Thus we concluded that there was every Chance that were we to return to the Masters Establishment and seek a hidden Cellar, we might well find our Man.

On Saturday Night, well after Sundown, we set forth, pausing only to gather together a Group of burly Constables, drawn from Round-houses well away from Mrs Masters’ Establishment (lest she have Arrangements in place to warn her of Interference from the Law). So it was that we arrived at our Destination in the Dead of Night with a Score of Constables. The Plan, such as it was, was for the Four of us to enter first, in the Guise of Customers to secure the easy Entrance of the Constables. Lord Foppingham was equipped with a bone Whistle with which to summon them. I was in the Semblance of an old Sea Dog, the others sported hooded Cloaks.

We entered unchallenged – doubtless old Sea Dogs and Gentlemen in hooded Cloaks were common Sights in there. However, once we entered I can only assume that my Companions were overcome by some Sorcery that caused them to behave in the most random and uncoordinated Fashion. Elmhill and the Baron both wondered off separately into adjoining Rooms while Milord Foppingham was apparently lost in Reverie, oblivious to the Purpose for which he had entered into this Place. Eventually, I took it upon myself to commence Proceedings, hoping that by doing so I might break the Spell of Confusion that confounded my Companions.

I commenced by breaking my Tankard upon the Head of one of the Door Guards and then engaged the other with my Staff. Unfortunately, I found myself encumbered by a Whore, who feeling herself slighted by my wandering Attention, threw herself upon me like a veritable Harpy, Talons to the Fore. Indeed I would have been in a pretty Pickle had Lord Foppingham not roused himself from his Befuddlement at this Point, blown his Whistle and thrown himself, Sword in Hand, into the Fray. Together we held a Crowd of “Doormen”, Customers and enraged Doxies at Bay, long enough for the Constables to arrive and secure the Establishment. It was unfortunate that in the ensuing Confusion Mrs Masters escaped – though on Reflection I would have been most surprised had someone of her Skills not so contrived.

Just as Matters began to settle, I sensed a sudden Pulse of Sephirothic power emanating from the Passage that the Baron had wandered down. Fearing some Devilry of Mrs Masters, I rushed along the Hallway, hotly pursued by Milord to find Stairs going down and the pure, white Light of Kether blazing upwards from the Depths. Crawling blindly out of the Light was the Baron, sightless and bleached by the cleansing Brightness of all Colour. I immediately apprehended that he had himself attempted to evoke for some Reason and expected to encounter some terrible Threat below. I could scarcely credit that he had evoked the full Power of the Sephiroth, at great Risk both to himself and all around him, for such a Trifle as a hidden Door.

As Mr Pope would have it in his Essay on Criticism “A little Learning is a dangerous Thing ”. I cannot say what possessed the Baron to do as he did and I confess myself aghast that he identifies me as his Inspiration. Evocation is monstrously dangerous, even for the most adept, and I view it as a Course of the very last Resort. I have evoked only in the most severe Extremis when more was at stake than merely my own Life and no other Course available. I own that the Baron may have witnessed me prevent the Egress of the Hounds of Tindloss from Wakefield’s Basement into the living World above by this Expedient. Otherwise I must assume that he has foolishly confused the swift Activation of Charms and pre-prepared Magicks for Evocation, or else taken my Conduct in Dreamland – within the Sephira – as an appropriate Model for Action in the World. I can only hope that the good Baron is in time fully restored to his full Sight (and Pigmentation) and that he learns from this Experience, which stands indeed as a Warning to all those who combine modest philosophical Learning with little Understanding of the underlying Principles of the Sephiroth to remain within the relatively safe confines of Invocations alone.

With the pure Light of Kether shining from it there was little Difficulty in discerning the whereabouts of the Door. Beyond it, chained, emaciated and filthy but still very much alive, lay Mr Kelly Pointer.

Wednesday, 22 September, 1736.

One Cadwal, a Deserter, got change for a 20 l. Bill at Cowpar in Fife, when paid it was discover’d to have been taken out of the Glasgow Mail above-said, whereupon the Person who paid it, rode after him, and got his Money ;  but let the Man go off, yet kept the Note.

At a Court of Common Council at Guild-hall, it was agreed to complete Fleet-Ditch for a Market, and that the Committee of City-Lands to immediately advertise to receive Proposals for building a Market-house, Shops, Stalls. &c.

Society Transactions Nº 181, 22 September 1736.

Lord Foppingham’s Report upon recent Actions

The Man in the Iron Privy

Part I. — A League Beleaguered

A Locus near, a Day but shortly past
Lay Solomon, in Domus shuttered fast
With naked Steel avowing purpose grim
A Mob uncouth unwelcome called on him
The wily Jew these brutal Foes evaded
Remarked at whose behest he had been raided
One Pointer Kelly raging full of Spleen
Was by the Man Sephardic plainly seen
Who wrote a modest Note unto that Gent
To find by what was this Outrage meant
Unto His meek and finely worded Plaint
Came back a Brew of Bile without restraint
That Law might help the unjust Burden bear
Went he to Number 1 Hanover Square
Where fair Astrea’s honest votive Peer
Did graciously his awful Story hear
the handsome Footman Godwin then was sent
Unto the house of Pointer with Intent
A Meeting twixt the Parties all to set
In train that Needs of Justice may be met
Yet in that did the sturdy Footman fail
There being none at home save Abigail
That Pointer had been from his Home away
Full Weeks and more led all of them to say
Some Villany for sure was then afoot
A false KP for certain at its Root
The noble Lord did subtle Query make
Of League Antaeus, genuine or fake
While Godwin ready Charm did he maintain
on worthy Doris News there to obtain
ere long at Coffee House of Mister Kent
a cowardly Attack was foiled that meant
the Life of Godwin cruelly to end
or Missive most discouraging to send
the Perpetrator vile was by them took
to task and squirméd he upon the Hook
well readily did he then point a Finger
lest he himself in Durance Vile should linger
Miss Masters known by intimates as Sally
her House of ill Repute within Mouse Alley
that seeming Evidence was quickly tested
when Foppingham had Sally M arrested
who did to none but small Defaults attest
with many prideful sneering spiteful Jest
till neath the Magistrates unbending Gaze
she sought him by her Sorcery to daze
alas for her that philosophic Bawd
great Waters into Chamber hugely poured
her Evocation of the Path of Cunning
gave back Rewards quite far from being Stunning
a Name gave she unto them most discreet
and shortly found her herself back on the Street
now had they part of Story plain in sight
yet more of it did shortly come to Light
the League Antaeus in itself divided
real Pointer by some devilry elided
they note unto the depute Farnsworth sent
and into London’s noise and bustle went
where as they in a Tavern raised their Mugs
were set upon by heavily armed Thugs
whose guns with eldritch potent Powders charged
they discharged all about as in they barged
a cruel Fate for these Fellows lay in store
as one by one they weltered were in Gore
by Footman Lord and financial Advisor
those who tried to run were proved the Wiser
when Smoke and Noise of Battle were no more
shrewd Solomon did spy upon the Floor
the recent Kelly Pointer Doppelganger
his Life now spent upon his Lordship’s Hanger
a merry Shout then did Bystanders say
“for good Lord Foppingham, Hip Hip Huzzay!”
Ale and Brandy thereupon did flood
where lately Tavern Floor was running Blood
their alcoholic generous hearted Cheer
took then its Toll upon the noble Peer
till carried off by Godwin when unable
to keep from sliding underneath the Table
to House of Pointer real they had resort
to serve them in the Office of a Fort
and by the Wisdom of the good ben E
poor Doris’ evil Mazement plain could see
and when that Night the Doers of that Deed
came by a Message clear for them to heed
heard they that gave the honest Ones Alert
that League of theirs with Treachery was girt
while Doris Mind was healed by lore Mosaic
the Magistrate of her a guest did make
Housekeeper slow recovering her Wit
did unto unperforméd Charge admit
a Letter hid that she would willing carry
in case her Master long away should tarry
one further Expedition they did make
to find the Letter that she was to take
and as she sought and coyly there it found
Alarm took they as seeing all around
their Foemen of the royal Club corrupt
well armed their Motions meaning to disrupt
in Portico by Doorway solid barred
lay they a big and shortly fused Petard
and did such harm unto the Architecture
Lord F resolved to them to read a Lecture
And so the Hero Threesome entered Battle
And slew the Foe alike unto mere Cattle
But being sorely pressed upon by Number
when One Foe split another’s Head like Lumber
Remarked upon that oddness of Behaviour
And greeting called to this their welcome Saviour
And thus well met with Farnsworth counsel took
for missing Pointer promised they to look

Part II. — Through Adversity to the Depths

As Summer ebbed and Autumn did begin
Commons passed an Act against the Gin
But as the Law’s anti-Geneva Wrath
Was builded One of Skill in Sephiroth
Unclouded Mind of Doris lately spoiled
The Truth there hidden now at last uncoiled
A lowly Bully of the Mohawk sort
Flash Powder used to maze her for their Sport
The true and honest English serving Maid
Resolvéd now by no Man to be swayed
From her last Charge a Letter swift to carry
And never there for Answer Message tarry
And as she on this Errand did depart
To keep her safe from harm it was the Part
Of Solomon, the wise and Jez the cocky
With Accent now and then a little rocky
guarded by these grim determined Men
her Path amid the teeming of the Wen
unto the royal Court of Fred’rick led
where she her vital Secret burden shed
then Villains who Abductors would fain be
in painted Face erupted from alley
oh foolish they to start upon the Deed
how quickly did their Head and Conscience bleed
and were by our good Members swiftly scattered
or Captive made when out of Senses battered
once taken Miscreant in Cell was bound
Redressers all in Séance gathered round
where by the workings of their learned Friend
strove in a Dream a Path to Pointer wend
Elmhill, ben Ezra and Lord F the toff
And that Freiherr the Baron Stossenknopf
a way a Path a Route by Courage made
’cross Morpheus Realm by Pistol and by Blade
Many a Challenge did they boldly meet
Until at last could Quarry Pointer greet
With subtle Game the bonded strove to say
With Picture Cards his Prison to betray
from this came they to know that the poor Fellow
was Captive held beneath Masters Bordello
as they decided what Course was now best
came unto Kent’s a note from Schuttenfest
Whom swift was F this German to invite
To dine with him at Home the coming Night
Alas for him those elegant Soiree Plans
Came all to Nought at the unruly Hands
Of Mohawk Bravos bent on coarse Affray
The Coach of his Guest striving to Delay
The fine Repast must needs untimely spoil
While some ran out to rescue Servant royal
A treacherous Assault on Kitchen Staff
Beat off by fellow Guests like unto Chaff
One quiet Missive from the Prince’s Man
Discreetly given o’er the Spinach Flan
Sought release of Doris late Assailant
By merest Hint and never over blatant
next Evening these Three Investigators
went to the House notorious that caters
for Venery and such and at its Door
Pretence of simply seeking for a Whore
the cunning Stratagem it was by which
Entry was gained by them without a Hitch
and thereupon ensued a brief Hiatus
too much for testy Solomon’s Afflatus
and into Doormen shortly did he wade
the nearest from behind was all but slayed
Remue-ménage unholy did ensue
in consequence of which the Members Two
must fast themselves defend against the Hate
and summoned burly Constables await
Lord Foppingham the manly Beau Sabreur
ben Ezra quite the cunning obéreur
pressed sorely by Protectors of the Ponce
their fellow Members absent for the Nonce
but Brothel Trash would never hope to win
their Constitutions ruined by the Gin
ere long the present Forces of the Crown
the final arméd Resistance put down
as then the final winning Side took Stock
ben Ezra’s Face revealed a sudden Shock
and off he ran like one bereft of Sense
toward the Stairway leading to the Gents
his other-worldly Wisdom having told
of some attempted Magic over-bold
and up the Stairway came no smell of Shite
but rather came a Man all gleaming white
von Stossenknopf it was who had evoked
and stood now brightly radiantly cloaked
the Prompt for his late sephirotick Trick
a Door by Magic hid within the Brick
which being openéd no more concealed
the missing Pointer finally revealed.

Saturday, 25 September, 1736.

A Proclamation was publish’d offering a Reward of 200 l. and his Majesty’s Pardon, to the Discoverers of any Person concern’d in the Murder of Capt. Porteous, and for every Person so discover’d, and convicted, 200 l.

Sunday, 26 September, 1736.

Daniel Malden having been retaken at Canterbury, upon a Quarrel with his Wife, was brought under a strong Guard to Newgate, and chain’d down in the Hold.

Monday, 27 September, 1736.

Bonner, Rowe, Dwyer, and O Neal, were hang’d at Tyburn  ;  but Hornbrook and Thomas were repriev’d.

Tuesday, 28 September, 1736

The Time approaching for putting a Stop to the Retailing of distill’d Spirituous Liquors in small Quantities, the Persons who kept Shop for that purpose began to make Parade of mock Ceremonies for Madam Geneva’s Lying-in-State, which created a Mob about their Shops, and the Justices thought proper to commit some of the chief Mourners to Prison. The Signs also of Punch-Houses were put in Mourning .

This Morning a Double Guard mounted at Kensington  ; and in the Evening a Detatchment of 60 Soldiers went to guard Sir Joseph Jekyll’s House, at the Rolls in Chancery Lane, which was said to be threatened, among others, by the Populace, who were gather’d that way ; his Honour having been so publick-spirited as to exeet himself in procuring the Act to pass.

When Discontents express’d the bitterness in their Hearts by committing Violences, the Horse and Foot-Guards and Train’d Bands were order’d to be properly station’d to repel the Populace where it might gather. Some Shots were necessitated to be fired when, after the reading of the Riot Act, those inflamed by the Spirit of Madame Genever, failed to lawfully disperse while seeking to petition his Majesty at St James’ Palace at Midnight. Disturbances occurr’d through the night, in divers Locations, with some of damaging of Property and House breaking, but the Mob dispersed at the merest Hint of Authority and few firm Encounters are reported, though many spent an unquiet Night in pursuit.

Society Transactions Nº 184, 29 September 1736.

A short Note from Mr ben Ezra.

Fellow Members

I pen this Account in haste whilst in the Monument of the Great Fire where I now await what the Dawn may bring on this Night of Chaos and Mayhem in London – the very Eve of the Enactment of the Gin Act, for which we have all striven so hard. I feel it of the utmost Importance that lest I not survive this Night some Record at least remain.

I sit surrounded by the Dead in the main Chamber where the Controls for Newton’s fantastical Engine of London are sited. The Stench of Blood and Gunpowder is all around. Lord Foppingham is with me, unhurt if somewhat dazed in his Wits by Exposure to Flash Charges. There is a Lad, the last Survivor of the Staff of the Monument, to whom I will entrust this Account, and his Cat. Among the Slain is Mr Caterham, the self-styled “Master” – a long-time Adversary of our Society, though one I had not personally encountered prior to this Day. There is some be-robed Functionary of the Mohawk Societies slain with him, along with a Yahoo Blade and some half dozen Mohawk Ruffians. Mr English, the Captain of the Mohawk Societies, lies dead at the Foot of the Monument. All these were dispatched by Milord Foppingham alone with only myself to aid him, in as hot an Engagement as I can ever recall.

We have long known that dark Forces are at work in our fair City. From the Perspective of our Society we have observed them arrayed against that most laudable Item of Legislation, the Gin Act. However, this Night we have seen that there have been greater Interests at Work than just the Partial Manoeuvrings of those whose Income derives from the Purveyance of hard Liquor and the Gin-soaked Rabble that sustains their Trade. This Night, Lord Foppingham and I have discovered a Conspiracy that runs to the very Heart of our Government.

Members will recall that during the Disturbances at his Residence a few Weeks ago Lord Foppingham detained a pair of Mohawk Ruffians. One of these proved a vicious Recidivist and is currently entertained in Newgate awaiting Trial. The other was of more co-operative Inclination and by judicious Use of his Knowledge and Contacts we contrived to infiltrate his Society. I will not waste my Time or yours in rendering an Account of the tedious Conversations and silly Rituals we endured to establish ourselves (needless to say we were heavily disguised to hide each our true Nature and Station) in their odious Company. However, as was our Object we discovered somewhat of their underlying Intent. This led us to attend a great Gathering in the ancient Undercroft of the Public House where they were wont to congregate.

Here we were harangued in Demagogic Fashion by both Caterham and English. For those with Eyes to see them there were clear Evidences of some Philosophical Art being used to influence the Minds of those so gathered – our natural Scepticism, Wit and Resolve kept us Safe from these Blandishments, but our fellow Audience Members were clearly most affected. Interspersed with the usual Humbug about the God-given Right of every trueborn Englishman to drink himself to Ruin with Mother Gin and to squander his Resources to the Benefit of her Procurers, were Themes that were quite Treasonous in their Sentiments. While careful not to propose Harm directly to His Majesty’s Person, much Bile was expended upon his Policies and his “Wicked Advisors”.

There was certain Apparatus set up in the Assembly Place, which I could see had some philosophical Purpose. At the Climax of their Rantings there was conjured forth an Apparition. This Conjuring had a Face and spoke oddly, with a strong German Accent. It expanded upon the Theme of the King’s Advisors and called upon those assembled to march upon St James’s Palace that very Night. As we departed in the general Throng, Foppingham took my Arm and whispered in my Ear that he was very sure that the Apparition was none other than Crown Prince Frederick. We realised that we were in the midst of a most serious and heinous Conspiracy – the projection of the Image and Voice of the Crown Prince clearly a Means to reach many such Gatherings of Malcontents.

We moved swiftly to thwart their Plans. Foppingham hastened to the Palace to raise the Alarum and prepare them to repel the Rabble. I made my way to Kent’s to muster the Society. There I was fortunate to find Mr Secretary Berry who was kind enough to take my hurried Account at Face-Value and immediately set about summoning and deploying the Members in opposition to the Enemies of our Cause.

It being clear that he could manage very well without my Assistance, I took myself off to the Palace by fast Sedan. However, en route it came to me that it would be well to take Counsel with Mr Kelly Pointer to find what he might be able to add, for I knew that he was connected with the Crown Prince and yet I was very certain that he would have no truck with Treason. I still had about my Person the Device with which I had first tried to find him when he was in Captivity. On that occasion he had been Veiled from my Sight, now the Charm sprang into Life and I realised he was quite proximate. By its Agency I was able to intercept him before he entered the Residence of the Crown Prince, thereby saving him from certain Disaster.

As I told my Tale his Face grew grave. “There are Feints within Feints here, but I fear that the assault on the Palace is yet another, ” quoth he. “Sure it is, that the real Target is the Great Machine of Newton. With that in their Power they will Control the City, the King and the Kingdom. Alas that so much was revealed to the Prince Frederick, our Sponsor. He makes ill Use of his Knowledge. We must at once to the Monument. ” He spoke with such Vehemence that it did not occur to me to challenge his View. It was well that I did not.

We made our way back to Kent’s with Dispatch, but I bethought me to send a Boy with a note of hand for Foppingham to make him aware of Developments. At Kent’s, the ever-patient Mr Berry once more took Heed of my Tale and set about the Business of redirecting those Society Members who had not already proceeded to St James’s to the Monument. While he made these Arrangements, Pointer and I set off. Just a few Streets from our Destination we heard the sound of Hooves. Fearing hostile Pursuit we turned at Bay. Our Pursuer, it transpired, was none other than that great Knight of the Realm, Lord Foppingham, mounted most appropriately on a most elegant and splendid white Steed. We apprised him swiftly of the Situation and the Three of us approached the Monument of the Great Fire of London.

I fear I do not know what happened to Pointer as we rushed the Door of the Monument. There was a Cry and perhaps he just stumbled. Intent on our Objective, Foppingham and I surged onwards. We burst through the Door, which was unlocked, and guessing where the Seat of the Matter would be we rushed down to the Basement. The Assemblage of Miscreants described above was gathered around the great Engines of Sir Isaac Newton, housed in that Place (all excepting Mr English – more of whom later). A small Group of Servitors of that Place cowered before two of the Scoundrels armed with Blunderbusses. Alas, as we burst into the Chamber, their first Reaction was to slay these poor Unfortunates, no Doubt lest they join the Fray with us.

The Engagement was sharp and bloody, but with Fortune, Righteousness and the Element of Surprise in our Cause we overcame the considerable Odds laid against us and slew our Enemies – Quarter being neither offered nor sought on either Side. With all the Rebels slain at our Feet there remained yet another deadly Threat to our City. They were accompanied by what seemed an elderly yet remarkably vital and agile Woman. With my Philosopher’s Eye I gauged immediately that here we had the most tangible and potent Manifestation of Mother Gin, who began to swing about Newton’s Engine, unbalancing the great Mechanisms and setting it awry. Here was no mere Corporeal Being who might be struck down by Sword or Shot. In an Instant I saw the only Path that might save the City and the Realm from untold Damage was one that I had quite recently adjured all from contemplating except in the direst Emergency.

Evoking Tipharet I sought to banish her from the World of Men, back to the furthest reaches of the Sephira where such Spirits rightly belong. The Room faded into Background and we found ourselves upon open Savannah, a hot Wind blowing and the sound of a terrifyingly bestial Roar upon it. My Invocation had found its mark upon Mother Gin, who was fading fast yet we found ourselves assailed once more by the Souls of the recently Departed, confused by their new Status but hostile, not only on Account of our Enmity in Life but also the Envy and Malice that the Dead hold against the Living. Fortunately, with the Gate between our World and Tipharet already rent open (for this was the Manifestation of that Realm in which we now stood) I was able to fend these restless Spirits off. As I did so, the Roars became ever louder and a monstrous Lion bounded into our View. Fortunate it was for us that its Appetite was for Spirits rather than mortal Flesh. One by one it gobbled up the Spirits of the newly departed, pouncing last upon Mother Gin Herself.

I believe that what we witnessed was a Metaphor, a Playing out in a Way that our Feeble Humanity could comprehend, of Creation being put once more in Order. Let No-one believe that Mother Gin has been destroyed or banished forever. Those distilling and consuming large Quantities of ardent Spirits may always wittingly or unwittingly conjure her forth. However, what I believe we have achieved is the breaking of the vicious Cycle where her malign Influence may be bent towards spurring weak Mortals to do that which gives her all the more Strength and Power over them – viz. the ever-more injurious Ingestion of her iniquitous Substance. It is most fervently to be hoped that the Gin Act, for which we have all campaigned will thwart her from Reassuming her Power in this Realm for many Generations to come.

As the Manifestation of Tipharet began to fade I was able to view, as if illumined in the last Rays of the evening Sun, the magnificent Engine of Sir Isaac. Here was a Mechanism that governed the Temper of the City and beyond it the Realm – a Construct at the same time Physical and Philosophical, wrought by a veritable Genius. I realised that this great Machine could influence the Minds of Men across the Land. Its natural setting was to regulate the natural Rhythms of this Island and render it free from the internal Machinations of external Foes; to promote and nurture the best Aspects the British Character – Industrious, Phlegmatic, Independent of Thought, yet Respectful of Authority and Law-Abiding except under great Provocation – and harness it to the Defence of the Realm. It has doubtless been due in no small Part to the Influence of this Mechanism that we have been able to resist the Blandishments of Mother Gin and her human Consorts.

I confess that I felt an almost overwhelming Temptation to manipulate the Mechanisms. Small Adjustments might have render this Land far easier and much more agreeable for me and for my People. I also felt an equally strong Impulse to destroy it. I had seen how close we had come to seeing it fall into the Hands of those who would have used it to manipulate us all to their vile, self-interested Ends. In the End I allowed neither Emotion to rule me, and chose simply to gaze upon it in Wonder and Admiration.

As the Sephira of Tipharet faded from the chamber, I was roused from my reverie by Foppingham who reminded me that there might be yet more Devilry at Work in the Monument. So it proved, since, reaching the Summit, we found it to have been rigged all around with huge flash charges. There we also found Mr English, who after a short Bout of Ring-a-Rosie found himself Face to Face with the righteous Wrath and well-honed Blade of Lord Foppingham. I believe that Milord might well have chosen to take him alive but in evading his initial Feint, English took a careless Step backwards, plummeting to a richly-deserved Doom. Unfortunately, before he did so he had contrived to light the Fuse.

We set about in a Frenzy to disarm the Flashes. Although we felt sure we had contrived to disrupt the Messages designed to accompany them, great Harm could still be done to London’s Citizenry by inserting entirely random Thoughts and Miscomprehensions into Minds rendered vulnerable by these Charges. Lord Foppingham was caught a couple of Times by Flashes that he failed to interdict in Time. However, in the Main we were able to evitiate their Malign Effect.

Wearied by our Travails we retired to Rest and to see what the Dawn might bring.

View of the Monument from Gracechurch Street looking south down Fish Street Hill to St. Magnus Martyr, beyond which is London Bridge.

Wednesday, 29 September, 1736.

Sir John Thompson, Kt. Alderman and Vinter, was elected Lord Mayor of London for the Year ensuing.

One Donovan was taken into custody for being the Author of and vending Songs and Libels against the Government.

Society Transactions Nº 185, 29 September 1736.

A Further Note from Mr ben Ezra.

Geburith in London

A Further Note from Mr ben Ezra.

Once more I find Myself scratching Notes in Haste, while all around me are Scenes of Slaughter. I pick up my Tale on that dreadful Night, the Eve of the Enactment of the Gin Law, in the Monument of the Fire of London. As Dawn approached Foppingham and I were joined by two of our Confreres, the bellicose Munro and a Caledonian Henchman, not previously known to me, who had come hotfoot from Kent’s to aid us. Together we concluded that our next Step must be to locate Mr Hayley, the Curator of the Monument, for I was sore afraid that the Traitors might have tampered with the Workings of the Great Mechanism, before we came upon them and might yet through its Influence upon the Mood of the City achieve some part of whatever Outcome they sought.

None of us being directly acquainted with the Fellow we had no Idea where his Residence was located. We thus bethought us to go to the Royal Society, where he was known to be a Member. There we prevailed upon the Staff to despatch a Boy with a Message for Mr Hayley.

As we awaited a Response a Group of hard-looking Coves arrived at the Royal Society, also seeking Mr Hayley. Our Experiences of the Night just passed made us Wary and we prepared once more for Action. However, it transpired, after some terse Enquiries on both Sides that these were King’s Messengers. By the Time we had established each other’s Credentials the Boy returned from his Errand with disturbing News. It seemed that he had found Mr Hayley’s mansion burned and looted, with no Sign of the Gentleman.

Foppingham exerted the natural Leadership of his Class to take Command of the Situation and lead both Groups to the Scene. There we established to our Relief, that although a Band of Mohawks had come a-visiting Mr Hayley in the Night, they had been thwarted in their Efforts to seize him as the Gentleman was out of Town. They had burned his House down out of sheer Picque. The King’s Messengers seemed somewhat discomfitted that their chief Objective had been denied them and somewhat at a Loss to know what to do next. With some Reluctance they agreed that Milord Foppingham was best placed to take Custody of the Monument, and returned him the Keys which he had earlier (to my Dismay) relinquished to their keeping.

We returned to Kent’s and consulted with a somewhat fatigued Mr Secretary Berry regarding suitably qualified Members of a Natural Philosophical bent, who might aid us in our Efforts to ensure that Newton’s Machine was restored to its original Settings. He procured for us the Services of the most excellent Mr Crosswaite. With his able Assistance we were able to identify the Change made (for as we suspected there had indeed been some Tampering with the Mechanism) and reverse it.

Elated but exhausted we repaired once more to Kent’s for some well-earned Rest. However, Repose was not yet to be our Lot, for awaiting us at Kent’s was a Note of Hand from Kelly Pointer, who we had last seen as we approached the Monument the previous Night. We understood that he had discovered Something regarding one of the underlying Mysteries of this Affair – the Ubiquity of the Flash-charms, once the sole Purview of the Antaeus League, but now apparently deployed at Whim, by every Street Tough in London. Throwing off our Fatigue, we hurried to meet Pointer.

En route to our Rendezvous, we undertook a brief Reconnaissance of the Address indicated by Pointer as the Seat of his Suspicions and it took but a small Fraction of my Skills in such Matters to discern the telltale Sprinkle of the noxious Blooms of Hinom, indicating the vile Influence of the First Creation.

We hurried to a nearby Coffee House where we found Mr Pointer sitting, somewhat nervously awaiting our Arrival. Foppingham and I had both taken the Precaution of donning the Guises I had devised for our Infiltration of the Mohawk Society, so our initial Discussions with Pointer were Guarded. However, he gave us to understand that his Investigations had convinced him that he had discovered the Location of a Factory producing Quantities of Flash Powders. Our converse was interrupted when we became aware that a large Group of Mohawk Bravos was converging upon the Coffee House. A savage Brawl ensued, which in Deference to our Hosts we took out into the Street. Although they outnumbered us by two to one, the Mohawks were no Match for our Pair of martial Scotchmen, who laid about them with great Gusto. Those who were still standing soon fled in the Direction of their Factory. We set off in Pursuit.

We left in our wake considerable Confusion for Foppingham had seen fit to throw off his Disguise, in full Sight of All, giving rise to Cries of “Sorcery” from the Bystanders. It was only the Force of the Moral Authority conferred upon him by his Rank and his Magistracy that allowed him to quiet them – and it was touch and go at that. The Incident stands as a salutary Lesson and Reminder of the prevailing Hostility of the Common Man towards the higher Philosophies. Hopefully, it is one that Lord Foppingham will keep in Mind, and in Future deploy more discretion in the use of such Charms and Effects I fashion for him. While I owe him my deepest Gratitude and Respect, I confess that I do not relish the Prospect of being rent limb from limb by an angry Mob in his Service.

We followed the Fugitives to the very Threshold of the Factory and entered in. There the Nature of the Struggle was Transformed into Something very much more Deadly as we discovered that at the beating Heart of this Enterprise was a Geburith. Huge, lowering, brazen hard and inimical to Mankind, it was a fearsome Opponent. Nevertheless, by our combined Efforts we were eventually able to lay the Behemoth low.

We must now make Inventory of this Place. It is clear that we have a quantity of Flash Powder. We have the dead Husk of a Geburith for Study – so that we might better combat Them and their Like in future. We must also seek Evidence as to Identities of the Movers behind this Business, for Geburim do not conjure Themselves into this Realm. I must also ensure that the Place is ritually cleansed along with all those, including Ourselves, who have been within its Precincts.

Thursday, 30 September, 1736.

The Gardens which have been making in Lincoln’s-Inn-Fields were finished, being inclosed with Iron Rails and Stone Pyramids fix’d up at proper Distances for Globular Lamps.

The Robberies talk’d of this Month are very numerous, yet some have predicted more for next. Maidenhead Thicket, Hounslow Heath, Putney, Barns, and Finchley Commons, and Places adjacent, have been the Daily Scenes of Action. In Whatson, two Highwaymen pursued a Gentleman up to a House, but he getting in from’em, they forc’d their way thro’ the Turnpike and rode off ; three or four Persons murdered by Robbers.

Extract of a Letter from S. Carolina, July 18.
   The French had prepared an Army of 2500 white Men, besides Indians, to attack us: But the Advice of Peace put a Stop to their March, and only a detachment of 200 white Men and 400 Indians called Illinois, advanced to join a party from New Orleans to cut off the Chekasaw Nation ; but those coming from towards Canada, not meeting with the New Orleans party at the Landing place appointed, and thinking themselves strong enough, attacked the Chekasaw Towns ; but were shamefully beat in an open Fight by not more than 300 Men (that being the most they can make ;) near 40 Frenchmen and 7 or 8 Indians, were killed in the Fight ; and 20, with their Commander in Chief (Brother to M. Bienville, Governor of New Orleans ) and 1 Indian, taken Prisoners, and all immediately burnt at the Stake, except 2 or 3 of the common Men preserved for the same Purpose. There is a flying Report just come from the Creek Indians that the other French Party is also cut off, several Nations of the Indians having join’d against them.
This is great and good News for our Southern Frontiers of America.

October 1736

Friday, 1 October 1736.

One James Todd who represented the Miller’s Man in the Entertainment of Dr Faustus, this Night, at the Theatre in Covent-Garden fell from the upper Stage, in a flying Machine, the Wires breaking, fractur’d his Scull, and dy’d miserably ; 3 others were much hurt, but recover’d. Some of the Audience Swooned, and the whole were in great Confusion upon this sad Accident.

Thursday, 7 October 1736.

A Man and his Wife, at Rushal in Norfolk, having some Words, he went out and hang’d himself. The Coroner’s Inquest found it Self-Murder, and ordered him to be buried in the Cross-ways : But his Wife sent for a Surgeon, and sold the Body for half a Guinea ; the Surgeon feeling about the Body, the Wife said, He is fit for your Purpose, he is as fat as Butter  ; and then he was put naked into a Sack, with his Legs hanging out, thrown upon a Cart, and convey’d to the Surgeon’s.

Society Transactions Nº 191, 8 October 1736.

Captain Uffingham’s Account of a recent Action against the Gin.

London : On the Issue of a Crimson Bull, Sorcery & the Fire Pit.

Being an Account of an Adventure in the Region of Cock Lane.

It was a brisk Thursday in October ; I was partaking of one of Mr. Kent’s excellent Beverages in the Company of Messers Byron and Pickering, both Members of our esteemed Society. We were approached by another Member, Mr. Berry, our Society’s Secretary, whose Countenance betrayed a Degree of Concern.

Discourse elucidated his Worry: a local Magistrate, one Sir Norris Wyndleham was finding a particular Establishment difficult to squash. No sooner was one Gin Den closed down than another sprang to Life. Our Interest piqued, we offered our Services to conduct discrete Investigations.

Acting upon Information supplied by Mr. Berry, our Perambulations took us in the Direction of Cock Alley just North of the Ditchhole Brewery, where sharp Eyes and quick Wits led us to a rude Dwelling being transformed by the addition of a Sign – that of a Red Bull; indeed the name of the Phoenix-like Establishment.

We entered a nearby Pie Shop, where Mr. Byron displayed an uncanny and frankly, unnerving, Ability to deal with the Produce in Quantity – much to the Delight of Mistress Venables, the Proprietress. From here we made discreet Observations, noting a Surveyor who entered the Building. Taking the Bull by the Horns, I essayed forth and engaged the Artisans in Conversation. This revealed that the Den was indeed due to open that same Evening. I was also apprised of the Nature of the Surveyor; an exacting Individual who required that all Work be conducted to a ‘just and true Measure’ which Description alerted Mr. Byron to the potential presence of sorcery. Later, we witnessed the apparent arrival of the Gin; yet closer watch by Mr Pickering revealed that the Delivery consisted of Nothing more than empty Bottles.

That evening, Mr. Byron and I returned to the ‘Risen Bull’ as the Crier at the Door proclaimed. We made our Entrance and studied the Arrangement of the Building. In the meantime, Mr. Pickering reconnoitred the Rear of the Building.

Our Inspection revealed that just off from the main Serving Place was a Room to which Entry was prevented by a Pair of Ruffians. Bearing in Mind the need for Discretion, I pushed them aside with no great Force and strode into the Room. My Entry was nevertheless sufficiently unexpected as to cause the Sorcerer present to stumble in his Ritual. This proved an unfortunate Event, as from the glowing Grate over which he stood emerged two foul Manifestations of Demon Kind, evil Wolves of sinister Demeanour, fell Eyes glowing red, Jaws slavering as they fell upon the Sorcerer.

His two Assistants, who had been extracting Substance from the Grate, shewed their Breeding by turning Tail and fleeing. The Toughs at the Door were frozen in Horror and it was left to Mr. Bryon to draw his Sword and lunge at the nearest of the Spawn. When the Sword failed to discommode the raging Beast of the Netherworld, Mr. Byron promptly adopted a new Strategy. He contemplated enchanting his Sword, but such is his Puissance, that in his Enthusiasm, he overreached and opened a burning Portal over the Grate. This proved fortuitous as a third Wolf which emerged found itself instantly aflame and felt no immediate Urge to join the Fray.

As Ruffians fled, I presented a Stance and shot one of the Offspring of Hell in the Head, disposing of the Beast. This also served to attract the Attention of its Companions.

As I considered my Options, Mr. Byron became aware that his newly opened Portal was growing in size and that a Company of Giants, Titans and fiery Chariots was approaching at Speed and, it may be said, with some Rumbustiousness. Mr. Bryon promptly called upon a great variety of Powers and Names to assist in closing his Portal, but sadly to little Effect. However, being a Gentleman of considerable Resource, he then proceeded to open a second Portal, facing the First.

This was clearly Progress, and we paused in our Effort to consider, briefly, the exact Direction of said Progress.

But what of Mr Pickering, I hear you ask. Gentle Reader, his Night was one of Frustration. Upon hearing the Conflict, he approached, Post Haste, only to be thwarted by a Set of Shutters that resisted his Ministrations. Then, upon his freeing of the Shutters, his entrance was further delayed by the egress of the Sorcerer’s Assistants. He now entered the Battle as I discharged my second Pistol at a Wolf, though to little Effect.

At this Stage, the fiery Chariots burst from the Portal, only to plunge headlong into the new Portal which Mr. Byron had opened; to my untutored Ear it seemed as if they had run into a Clockwork Mechanism. Our Delight at this Turn of Events was tempered by the arrival of a Fire Titan which stumbled into the Room, causing Alarums.

Luckily, as I have recounted earlier, we were in the Company of Two of Man’s oldest Friends and the faithful Hounds, clearly realised where their natural Affinity lay abandoned their playful jousting with your Servant and leapt, bright Eyes sparkling to assault the scorching Monstrosity.

I took the Time to consider the State of the Building, which the blazing Titan had caused to burn merrily, and loaded my Pistols, whilst admiring the Work of our new allies, who I was considering naming Castor & Pollux. My contemplation of the possibilities of demonic Animal breeding was rudely interrupted by the Titan, whose contribution suggested that perhaps the sale of singed Wolf pelts might be a better Avenue to consider. It also served to draw my Attention to the Question of our Reputations should a two Span walking Inferno be loosed on the Capital.

With both Mr Pickering and I impotent in the Matter of Sorcery, we drew up Camp Chairs, lit Cheroots and provided Mr. Byron with our Advice and Suggestions. Seizing the Moment, and the Sorcerer, Mr Bryon heaved that Miscreant’s somewhat damaged Body into the Fire Portal. This Intervention occasioned the closure of the Clockwork Portal and the shrinking of the One that led to an Aspect of Mars. In a Spirit of helpfulness we pointed out that the Fire Titan remained an Impediment to a successful Outcome.

Mr. Byron thanked us for our Solicitude and then bent his Powers to commanding the Sending to return whence it came. The Titan obeyed, but in attempting to enter the reduced Portal, was split in twain, with the higher Part of the Creature left thrashing on the Floor as the Portal closed. As the baleful Liquids that gave the Titan Life drained away and it stilled, we took Stock.

To our Credit, we had the metallic Remains of the Titan and had clearly discommoded a sorcerous Plot. The Gin House was certainly closed for the Evening.

In the Debit Column, the Sorcerer was unable to help with our further Inquiries, his Allies had fled and we were in the midst of a burning Building. Plus one could posit, if one were so inclined, that our Approach had been less than totally discrete.

We collected the Pieces of demonic Armour and Mr Byron and Pickering withdrew from the Scene while I remained to organise the local Worthies into effective Bucket Chains, whose Participants were well victualised by the redoubtable Mrs Venables.

Other Matters of Note:

• A series of arcane glowing Runes which Mr. Byron sighted on the Fireplace
• A hidden Tunnel discovered by Mr Pickering which may merit investigation
• The Boxes of Material that were being excavated under the direction of the Sorcerer. Clearly heavy, we did not extract one, but they should still be present if we return with Speed
• The Significance of the Red Bull; the Villains risked attracting Attention by opening under the same Name, but may have found some arcane benefit from this Action
• The whereabouts of the Gin. Empty Bottles were delivered, yet in the Evening, Gin was most assuredly on sale.
• One Half of a Pie, which Mr. Byron placed in the Wagon used to deliver the empty Gin Bottles. I believe his Objective was to undertake some magical Scyring upon the Item, but Time was against us

There remain mysteries to investigate.

I remain your servant,
   God Save England,
      Tristan Uffingham

Friday, 15 October, 1736.

At the Sessions, at the Old Baily, 3 Criminals received Sentence of Death (viz. ) Wm Rine and Samuel Morgan, for the Highway, and Mary Campton, for stealing Goods ; one was burnt in the Hand, 12 ordered for Transportation, and 12 acquitted. Daniel Malden, received his former Sentence. The 5 Spittalfields Rioters were all found Guilty, order’d to be imprisoned for 2 Years and find Security for the good behaviour for 7 Years.

Saturday, 16 October, 1736.

Mrs Mapp the Bonesetter, with Dr Taylor, the Oculist, being at the Playhouse in Lincoln’s-Inn Fields, to see a Comedy call’d the Husband’s Relief, with the Female Bonesetter and Worm Doctor ; it occasion’d a full House, and the following :

E P I G R A M
While Mapp to th’actors shew’d a kind regard,
On one Side Taylor sat, on the other Ward  :
When their mock Persons of the Drama came,
Both Ward and Taylor thought it hurt their Fame ;
Wonder’d how Mapp cou’d in good Humour be —
Zoons, crys the Manly Dame, it hurts not me ;
Quacks without Art may either blind or kill ;
But * Demonstration shows that mine is Skill.

---

  *  This alludes to some Surprizing Cures she perform’d before Sir Hans Sloane at the Grecian Coffee-house (where she comes once a Week from Epsom in her Chariot with four Horses) viz. a Man of Wardour-Street whose Back had been broke 9 Years, and stuck out 2 Inches ; a Niece of Sir Hans Sloane in the like Condition ; and a Gentleman who went with one Shoe heel 6 Inches high, having been lame 20 Years, of his Hip and Knee ; whom she set straight and brought his Leg down even with the other.

---

And the following was Sung upon the Stage.

YOU Surgeons of London, who puzzle your Pates,
To ride in your Coaches, and purchase Estates,
Give over, for Shame, for your Pride has a Fall,
And the Doctoress of Epsom has out-done you all.

Derry Down, &c.

What signifies Learning, or going to School,
When a Woman can do, without Reason or Rule,
What puts you to Nonplus, & baffles your Art ;
For Petticoat-Practice has now got the Start

In Physick, as well as in Fashions, we find,
The newest has always its Run with Mankind :
Forgot is the Bustle’Bout Taylor and Ward  ;
Now Mapp’s all the Cry, & her Fame’s on Record.

Dame Nature has giv’n her a Doctor’s Degree,
She gets all the Patients, and pockets the Fee ;
So if you don’t instantly prove her a Cheat,
She’ll loll in her Chariot whilst you walk the Street.

Derry Down, &c.

Tuesday, 19 October, 1736.

60 Horse Load of Tea amounting to 70 hundred Weight was seized in Susses, by 3 Riding Officers, assisted by 3 Dragoons, and carried to Eastbourn Custom-house. The Smugglers were about 40, a good Part of whom after an Hours tippling, made an Attempt to regain the Goods, but were repulsed, and several of them wounded.

Wednesday, 20 October, 1736.

At Powderham, Devonshire, a Toad-Fish was thrown ashore ; it is 4 Foot long, has a Head like a Toad, 2 Feet like a Goose and the Mouth opens 12 Inches wide. One of this Kind was dissected at the College of Physicians in the presence of K. Charles II.

Society Transactions Nº 195, 20 October 1736.

Captain Uffingham’s Account of a recent Action against the Djinn.

London : Faces in the Mirrors; Dark Deeds under the Nose of the Church.

To Kent’s, where I have the Pleasure of meeting Lord Foppingham a Gentleman of Renown in London and his Companions, the Jew, ben Ezra and the Scot, Munroe. It is greatly to Lord Foppingham’s Credit that neither Race nor Creed is a Barrier to his Interest.

The three are deep in Discourse about strange and mysterious Sightings in London. Demonic Faces have been sighted in Windows, Puddles and Mirrors. These, according to the Jew, are Signs that Creatures from other Planes of Creation are pressing at the Bounds; ben Ezra opines that someone is, either through Malice or Stupidity, allowing the Creatures access to our Realm.

To investigate these Matters is not simple and we spend some Time discussing Options. After much Comment, we plot the sightings on a Map of London and espy Evidence that the sightings are around the Site of St Andrews Church, Holborn.

St Andrew’s Church, Holborn.

We take this as a Call to Action and led by Lord F—, we visit the Edifice. The Senior Sexton, Sanderstead, is roused from his Lodgings and provides us with a Tour. Tiring of his Effusions about the Building, I retire to Thavies where I make the acquaintance of one Quick Nancy, a Courtesan well appointed to provide Comforts to Man. While failing to elicit much Information directly from the Girl, a later Tryst in the Graveyard allows a sampling of her Charms and the Opportunity to gauge the Mettle of the Place. The Place has an unwholesome Feel as Night draws in and I find a Place to view the Yard. Late at Night, Sanderstead appears and enters the Church – soon after there are Apparitions aplenty. I depart, with care, to give my Companions this News.

The following Night we return, clad for Battle. ben Ezra’s Senses speak to us of a Creature he calls a Qlippoth ; an evil Manifestation and one to treat with Caution. Our Watch shews us more Apparitions – but amongst these walks Quick Nancy, still living and, from the rise and fall of her Bosom, breathing. As we puzzle over this, we see Sanderstead approach. Fearing lest harm befall the Girl, we advance to find that this is not Sanderstead, but some Ghost-like Wraith. The Wraith outpaces us, seizes Nancy and passes through the Door of the Church; fortunately for her Soul, thought less so for her Countenance, Nancy cannot pass through and falls stunned having struck her Head on the Door.

Lord F— seizes the Moment and commands the Door to open and we follow inside. All is dark and gloomy; a Lantern provides some Light, and ben Ezra illuminates a Device that he carries. We search the Crypt and notice that there are new Openings in the Wall – from which launch forth the foul Tentacles of the Qlippoth. They land upon Munroe, who after an initial and understandable Surprise shows the Strength of Mind of his Race in striking at the Beast and severing several of its Appendages.

The Horror is attacking through a narrow Gap, too small for any of us to enter. While Munro hews at the Tentacles, I draw my Pistols and sends Shots into the Darkness, hoping to strike Home. Lord F— arrives and joins Munroe ; the Weight of Blows and Shots sends it slithering back into the Darkness.

We pause to reload, while ben Ezra finds a Mechanism, which, when opened, reveals the lair of the Creature. It stands back and ben Ezra realises that it is conducting a Ceremony. On his urgent Call, Lord F— first shoots the Demon, then charges in followed closely by Munroe. In the Face of their Advance, the Qlippoth flees, leaving the intrepid Pair to face the summoned Bodies of two Dead. These unnatural Terrors hold no Fear to our Pair, who both strike Home and dispatch the Unfortunates.

There is left a Book, of which I shall say little. ben Ezra investigates and it is determined that it should be destroyed. While ben Ezra, guarded by Munro, seeks to dispel the noisome Airs of the Lair, I take the still stunned Nancy back to Thavies and Lord F— deals with the Watch which have been roused by the din. Lord F— and I also search for Signs of the Beast, but succeed only in attracting the attentions of a Footpad, who rapidly realises his Error and flees into the Night.

The following Day as ben Ezra delves in the Book, I visit Nancy to elicit her Memories of the Night. She can tell us little, she was escorted into the Graveyard and saw the Shades of some of those recently departed from the District; she promises to alert me should she see the Paramour who accompanied her into the Churchyard, but of whom we saw no Sign. A search for Sanderstead reveals no Sign at his Lodgings; but, to our Surprise, Quick Nancy strikes Gold, leading me on a Promenade past a local Butcher’s Shop where I lay eyes on Michael Gilbert, an Apprentice and the Scoundrel that, apparently, abandoned her to her Fate in the Churchyard.

In one of those Strokes of Fortune that alight upon good Men, we choose to investigate Sanderstead’s Dwelling ere we speak to Gilbert. There is still no Sign of Sanderstead and we take the view that he has likely perished, but our Search reveals a List, hidden in his Possessions containing a number of Names – including those of the recently deceased Richard English, alongside that of Michael Gilbert. His abandonment of Nancy now takes on a more suspicious Tone and we set ourselves to tackle the Cad at the earliest Opportunity.

There remain Mysteries to investigate.

I remain your Servant,
  GOD Save England,
    Tristan Uffingham

Thursday, 21 October, 1736.

A small Congregation of Protestant Dissenters met at Brixworth, Northhamptonshire, for divine Worship, the Mob of the Town rose, dash’d the Windows to Pieces, threaten’d the Life of a yoiung Gentleman of Northampton, who they supposed was to officiate there, siez’d William Beck Master of the House, and threw him several times in the Mud : It’s hop’d that Persons of superior Character, to whom Application is made, will consider how much the Liberty of the Subject and the publick Safety are concerned in this Affair.

Society Transactions Nº 196, 21 October 1736.

A Report by Capt. Uffingham

Some Private Notes on the Armour of Mars

Gentlemen, Thanks to the Endeavours of Mr Bryon, in which I was able to play some small Part, it has been possible to identify some of the Properties of the Armour recovered during our Foray against the Crimson Bull.

I share these with you so that, in our common Fight gainst Evil, all may know of the Abilities we may bring to bear.

In first part, the obvious to initial Inspection. The Armour is of a reddish brass Colour, most pleasing to the Eye. It comprises of a Helm, Breast and Back Plate and Guards for the Arms. When worn it appears to comport itself to the Dimensions of the Wearer.

The Armour is easy to wear, although I consider myself strong, a weaker Soul could manage; it fits well and, in as much as Armour can, can be said to be light. It presents a strange and, to our Enemies, fearsome Sight, particularly when the Helm is worn. The Helm covers the Features presenting a martial and to some Degree, unnatural Visage most unlike that of the military Forces of our Day, harking back rather to a mediæval Time. Gentlemen, both Friends and Foes can understandably be afeared at the Sight and the Armour is not suitable for disport on the Streets of London.

The Armour is robust; a solid Strike by a Footpad that attacked from the Rear caused mild Surprise only. However, Feats requiring Agility are best left to Others less encumbered.

Vision is compromised, but the Makers have compensated for this through imbuing the Armour with mystical Attributes. Once a Foe is chosen, I am aware of their Presence on the Field of Battle allowing me to locate, pursue and strike them down with Righteous Wrath.

In short, Gentlemen, while of scant use in polite Society and, in truth, a hindrance on the Streets of our fair City, the Armour allows a Fellow to take a lead and smite Evil mightily in any planned, more formal Engagement.

I await Opportunities for use with happy Anticipation.

I remain your Servant,
  GOD Save England,
    Tristan Uffingham

Friday, 22 October, 1736

The Magistrates of Edinburgh, to make an exact Scrutiny into the late Riot and Murder of Capt. Porteus order'd all the Burgesses, Traders, &c. to appear before the Dean of Guild, and give in an exact List of their Servants and Apprentices. Five of the late Rioters have been committed to the Castle.

Came on before the Rt Hon. the Ld Chancellor the Hearing of a Petition of Mr Allcock, of Waterford in Ireland, Guardian to Michael Aylmer, an infant about 6 Years old, Heir to a great Estate in that Kingdom, shewing, That the Mother, to bring up the said Child in the Romish Religion, did privately convey it away ; and that the said Guardian coming to London after it, found the Mother, but not the Child : To which she answer’d, That she brought it over for the Advice of Physicians, and that her Footman had, without her Privity, convey’d it away ; but she was order’d to bring it to the Court by next Thursday, or she should be sent to the Fleet

Monday, 25 October 1736.

Mr George Kelly, formerly Secretary to the Bishop of Rochester, made his Escape from the Tower, where he had been confin’d 14 Years, but had lately the Liberty to take the Air with a Warden : He wrote a letter next Morning to the D. of Newcastle, acknowledging his Majesty’s Goodness towards him, and excusing the attempt he had made to regain his Liberty, and another to a Gentleman in the Tower assigning over to him all his Books, &c. at his Lodgings. A Reward of 200 l. is offer’d for apprehending him.

The industrious Dutch having this year taken 589 Whales and 3 young Ones, the French and Spaniards 70 ; on this Occasion it was remarked, That if England has not had her Share in this profitable Fishery, she may boast of having out done all her Neighbours in Horse-racing.

At a Court of Common Council at Guildhall, it was resolved that Stocks market was the fittest Place for building the Mansionhouse for the Lord Mayor, and it was referr'd to the former Committee to prepare a Plans.

Society Transactions Nº 201, October 1736

The Other Side of the Glass

A Note from Mr Solomon ben Ezra

I am indebted to Captain Uffingham for his succinct and factual Account of our latest Endeavours. This relieves me of the Necessity to trouble fellow Members with Narrative. I propose instead to concentrate my Discourse upon the arcane Aspects of this Affair.

It is apparent to me that at the Heart of the St Andrew’s Church Affair is a Cult that seeks to obtain Power in this World by conjuring Creatures of great Malignity from the First Creation. Sad to relate, such Wickedness and Stupidity are by no means unfamiliar to us. There seems little Doubt that Sanderstead, the Sexton of St Andrew’s was involved and the Discovery of a List of presumed Associates, puts him firmly into the Ambit of the Mohawk Societies, since Mr Richard English was one of the Names thereon. There are sufficient Leads upon that List to provide us with a Number of future Actions to cast further Light on the Matter. However, I can at present say little that may not be refuted by subsequent Event.

Regarding the Church itself, it is my View that it has long been steeped in this Kind of Turpitude and were I to have my Way, it would be demolished forthwith and all means available to the Church of England should be bent towards cleansing the Area of its Taint. However, as I am only too aware my Voice will count for Nought in this Matter. I have done what little I can to render it less hospitable as a Temple of Evil by ritually cleansing the hidden Fane in its Crypt.

The Book which we found within the Fane is typical of the Minds of those who traffic thus. It is contains a number of Rituals, most of which are basically familiar to any serious Student of the Sephiroth. However, they are presented as discrete “Spells” lacking any unifying or coherent underlying Philosophy and cluttered with irrelevant Esoterica, that are more Theatrickal than Efficacious. There are some few Entries that may offer some Intelligence as to the Modus Operandi of its Author and Readers. However, the entire Work disgusts me, not merely for its Contents but also for the Materials from which I suspect it is constructed – I shall say no more. It is with Lord Foppingham and will be destroyed the Instant we have learnt from it all we may regarding its Provenance and the Intentions of its Followers.

Alas, I believe that a Qlippoth was secreted in the Fane and that there is every Possibility that it is now loose within the City. It is a Creature of great Evil and unless discovered and dealt with, will cause Harm to Many. It will seek a dark Place and I fear that the Harbinger of its Presence will be the Disappearance, without trace, of ordinary and innocent Residents of our City.

It is at present entirely unclear whether this Matter has any Connection at all with the alarmingly frequent Instance of Geburim faces glimpsed peering out from reflective Surfaces in London. This is a most disturbing Development, so hard on the Heels of our recent Encounter with a fully manifested Geburith here in the City. My Speculation is that frequent Intercourse with such Creatures might well serve to weaken the Barriers between us and the First Creation. Were they to be breached, then I believe the Outcome would be grave indeed. We must all work to ensure that such an Eventuality is evaded.

November 1736

Tuesday, 2 November, 1736

Malden, Rine, and Morgan were hang’d at Tyburn, Campton repreiev’d.

The Chancellor of a certain Diocese in the West lately excommunicated the Archdeacon&ndbsp;; the Archdeacon appealed, and the Chancellor not appearing, was excommunicated also.

Thursday, 4 November, 1736

Sir Hans Sloane communicated to the Royal Society a Letter from Job the African, whom Mr Oglethorpe released from Slavery, and the African Company sent home to his own Country about 12 Months ago. In his Letter he very gratefully acknowledges the Favours he receiv’d in England  ; and in answer to some Things desir’d of him when here, says, he has been in the Country where the Gum Arabick grows, (which at present we get chiefly from the French Settlements) and can assist the English in that Trade : That he has been up the Country as far as the Mountains from whence the Gold Dust is wash’d down, and that if the English would build flat-bottom’d Boats to go up the Rivers, and send Persons well skill’d in separating the Gold from the Oar (with which they may soon, and with ease, load their Boats) they might grain vastly more than at present they do by the Dust Trade ; adding, that he should always be ready to use the utmost of his Power, which is very considerable in that Country, to support them therein.

Tuesday, 9 November, 1736

Resolved by the Commissioners of Excise, that if the two Gallons of Spirituous Liquors be not of one Sort ; the Disposer of it shall be deemed a Retailer.

Sunday 14 November, 1736

A New Road thro’ High-Park to Kensington was open’d, and the old one barr’d up.

Society Transactions Nº 206, November, 1736

On The Tail of The Bull

An Account by Captain Uffingham of Dealings under London and Strange Re-Acquaintances

A brisk Day in November and a Boy brings a Note to me at the Barracks. Malapropos, military Matters detain me at Woolwich and arriving Poste Restante, mayhap, I find several Members of the Society already at Kent’s recounting a Tale of Battle under the streets of our fair City. Though saddened to miss the Contretemps, the Tale of their Fight against the Qlippoth can only elicit my most Hearty Congratulations.

To my great Pleasure, this Occasion also offers me the Opportunity to meet with two other Members of the Society, the German Inventor and Mechanist, Baron Albrecht and a young artiste in Lord Foppinham’s employ, one Simon Goodwin. I must confess that the Baron’s full Title, which escaped me at the Time, proves once again that the Teutonic Tongue is not best suited to my Lips, so let me provide his full Title but once, and from hence shall refer to the good Freiherr Doktorphilosophischundmechanisch Albrecht von Stoβenknopf by divers Names.

These three Stalwarts, in the Company of Mr Solomon ben Ezra had tracked down the Qlippoth and dispatched it, a Feat they will no doubt describe elsewhere.

With the Youth, Goodwin, called away, we four set to musing on our Search for the Source of the Visages that currently trouble London. ben Ezra and Lord F— had conducted some Investigation; but so far to no Avail. We took up on a last Lead, provided from the Lists of the Rogue Sanderstead, and set out to track down one Charles Martin, known on that List as Charles Templar.

An easy Fish to Land, Martin being a well known Individual who frequents Pepper’s, a somewhat inferior Establishment to our own dear Kent’s. Conversation with him proved, frankly, tedious as the Man was touched by a severe Case of Antiquanarianism, against which I vow only strong Liquor or a fast Horse provide a Sovereign Remedy. I had taken the Precaution of not sitting with the main Party, yet his Talk still induced a Languor in my very Bones. The Fellow troubled me, and it took some while before the Reason for this struck Home; Martin was no less than the Surveyor with whom I conversed outside the Crimson Bull.

Finding this further Link, we decided that some of the Mysteries of the Crimson Bull merited investigation and we Repaired to the last known Site of that Establishment. Gentle Reader, you may recall we left that Place in some disrepair and Sad to Recount, the Fires left little for Mr ben Ezra to work with. Never the less, we took the Opportunity to enter through a Trapdoor into the Stream beneath, searching for the Source of the Gin that so Surprisingly appeared on the Night. Sure enough, the keen Eyes of our Party found Evidence of Transport and we set of in search of a Source.

Our Journey was long and let it be said, somewhat insalubrious. However, if Men must travel into the Dark in pursuit of good Works, let it not be said that any of us were faint in this Matter. We passed under the Ditch Ale Brewery, a Scene of an earlier Triumph of the Society ; the Trail led on. We passed a Tunnel to one Side, ben Ezra noting some strange cabbalistic Signs carved there; though intriguing, our Path led elsewhere and we pressed on.

Finally the Marks turned and we entered a well founded Passage, dry, in as much as any neath London can be, and marked by the care with which the Beams and Supports were placed – indeed, in the same Manner and Proportions as the previous, cabbalisticly marked Tunnel had been. The Mark of Martin, perhaps, who is known to be a Martinet (and Bore) in these Matters?

Ever on we forged; with Illumination provided by ben Ezra, we presented a fine Target for the Ruffian with a Blunderbuss up the Passage. With not so much as a by your Leave, he gave Fire. It was fortunate that his Aim was as refined as his Manners, and both Lord F and the Baron escaped unscathed. Lord F– and ben Ezra responded in Kind, leaving the Ruffian prone on the Floor and we advance with Haste; at a further Corner, a second Ruffian also fired upon us; ben Ezra being of sufficient Presence of Mind and Aptitude to place himself out of Harm’s way. Taking the Lead, I pursued the Villain, but lacking his fleetness of Foot, was too slow to prevent him hurling a stout Door in my Face and throwing the Bolts. Although I set my Shoulder to it, it was of hardy Construction and not to be moved. A brief Inspection by the Baron revealed that his Devices would take some Time to allow us entry.

At this Point, ben Ezra stood forth; I shall draw a Veil over his exact Ministrations; let it be said simply that his Knowledge of arcane Matters rendered the Door less an Obstacle and we continued our Pursuit, much to the Surprise and Alarm of the Villain. We rushed into a large Room where the Smell of the Gin was strong. The Room was strangely appointed, large Vats of Gin and unusual Funnels, Chutes and Devices allowed the Gin to be poured down the very Stairs we were entering from. We had no Time to consider this Puzzle as the Miscreants were already working to flood us with the Liquor. Our speed of Entry had Discommoded them; and I took a Stance and shot at those engaged so, caused them to pause in their Endeavours. The Baron pausing only to hurl Lightning at the Workers to further delay their Efforts, made Haste to the Egress, to block the Exit of those fleeing, while Lord F— and I mounted Ladders to tackle those left who sought to release the vile Liquid. Meanwhile ben Ezra, from below, shot one dead. Lord F— had a brief and wholly successful Engagement with another, and a Third surrendered as I bore down on him.

At which point, an Overseer, whom we had overlooked, discharged a Pistol at ben Ezra. That worthy was affronted, and charged the Man, who promptly discharged a second Pistol at our Colleague. Mr ben Ezra survived both and began to set about the Fellow; despite our Member’s faculty at all forms of Combat, the Rogue proved tricky to subdue, but ben Ezra both kept him at Bay, and discomfited his Composure, until I was fortunate enough to strike the Overseer a Blow with the Flat of my Blade which knocked the Fight out of him.

Early in the Fight, ben Ezra had recognised the Place we were in as one belonging to the Widow Elder ; which in itself opens up new Avenues of Inquiry.

As well as the Overseer, we took possession of a Quantity of Papers; both Overseer and Papers will merit Investigation, which we shall no doubt accomplish. My own Mind is that we should most rapidly return to the Passage protected by the Signs.

Once more, gentle Men and Ladies, there remain Mysteries to investigate.

I remain your servant,
  God Save England,
    Tristan Uffingham

Monday, 15 November, 1736.

The Commissioners of Excise received Advice from one of the Officers in the Isle of Thanet that Mr Kelly embark’d at Broad-Stairs in that Island ; two Fishermen set him on Shore at Calais, he gave them five Guineas, and told them that if anybody enquired for George Kelly, they might say he was landed in France  ; on hearing the Advertisement read, offering 200 l. for taking Kelly, they cry’d out, Lord, this is the Man we landed in France, and related the Particulars.

Same Day about Twelve at Noon was laid at the South-West End of Shoreditch new Church, by Dr. Denne, the Churchwardens, and a few of the principal inhavitants, the Foundation Stone, with this inscription :

Has Ædes in D E I Cultum et Honorem
P A R O C H I A N I autoritate publica,
Sed suis sumptibus, a fundamentis refecerunt,
Et hunc lapidem A K P O Γ Ω N I A I O N posuit
J O H A N N E S D E N N E, S.T.P. Ecclesiæ Vicarius,
YVº. Die Novembris, A. D. MDCCXXXVI.
G E O R G I O DA N C E, Architecto.
GU L I E L M O GO S W E L L, Artificibus.
C A R O L O D U N N, Artificibus.

Society Transactions Nº 207, November, 1736

The Qlippoth

A Report from the Pen of Mr Solomon ben Ezra

I begin my Report with a brief Account of our Researches into Sanderstead, the sinister Sexton of St Andrew’s Church, who we believed to be the Conjuror of the Qlippoth and the Owner, if not the Author, of the vile Book we found in that Place. Aiding me were fellow Society Members Munro, the bellicose preaching Scot, and Herr Baron Stossenkopf, the German man of Science. Milord Foppingham being otherwise engaged – whether at his Tailors or at the Bench, I know not – he sent along his trusted Footman, Simon Goodwin, with Word that he would join us as soon as he might.

You will record from previous Accounts that there was a List of Names found Sanderstead’s Lodgings. One Name, Michael Gilbert, accorded with the Name, vouchsafed to Captain Uffingham by Quick Nancy, of the Fellow who had lured her to the Churchyard at St Andrew’s. We determined that our best Course was to question the Ruffian directly. Anticipating Reluctance, we apprehended him by a cunning Stratagem and brought him to Milord’s Residence where there is an excellent Facility for holding and questioning Malefactors.

The Tale we extracted from him accorded with our Suspicions. It seems that the Names on the List belonged to a Coterie of young Men whom Sanderstead employed to furnish him with Victims to feed to the Qlippoth. In return, Gilbert, a selfish, brutish and depressingly stupid young Man, believed that he was visited with the “Luck” of the Victim. I speculate that he was in receipt of some small Chokmah Charm which aided him at the Tables or the baiting Pits, for he was a keen Gambler.

We may suppose that Sanderstead was made to regret relying upon such haphazard Methods to provide Victims for the Qlippoth. It seems that Gilbert provided only rarely – when he felt his Luck was in need of Replenishment. It is likely that the others of his little Group were similarly motivated. I believe that one Night too many the Creature was disappointed of a Feast. When it turned on its Keeper, Sanderstead found that the rituals in his vile Book were inadequate to the Task. I can find little Pity in my Heart for such a knavish Fool.

Gilbert was of a Type familiar to me from my Infiltration of the Mohawk Gang during the Summer and most of his Fellows on the List belonged to that Class of Person. Two Names stood out: Richard English, who Gilbert felt gave himself Airs and who had been it seems an infrequent Member of the Group; and a “Gentleman” whose Name Gilbert knew not but who, by Process of Elimination, must equate to the “Charles Templar ” on Sanderstead’s List. English we knew to be deceased, cast by the hand of Foppingham himself from the Monument on the Eve of the Enactment of the Gin Act. We knew nothing of a Charles Templar but set in motion. More of that Anon, but while we awaited a Response, other News came to us that caused us to act instanter.

I am much obliged to those Gentlemen of the Society who brought to my Attention the strange Phenomenon of the Fleet Ditch running clearer than its wont. Alert as I was at the time to any Intelligence regarding the Whereabouts of the Qlippoth, I recalled the terrible sterility that these Creatures are apt to wreak upon their Environs, scouring all of Life. I reasoned that this then could be the Cause of the unnatural Clarity of the Ditch.

So it was that we took a Boat to see what might be observed. We soon discovered an Outflow into the Ditch from which trickled Waters of surprising limpidity. Following the Course of this Waterway through the Streets of London as best we could, for it swiftly disappeared Underground, we realised that we were in the parish of St Andrew’s. We came upon a small Courtyard where many People awaited to fill their Buckets. A Scotsman, a German, a Jew and a liveried Servant, we found ourselves viewed with some Suspicion. There was much Complaint about “Strangers” taking their Waters. The Baron’s attempts to deploy his famous Teutonic Charm began to attract open Hostility and we swiftly disengaged. We continued to follow the Course of the Waterway and found a Pump in the Environs of St Andrew’s Church itself. Here we found no waiting Throng and the Water to be of reassuring filthiness.

Secure now in the Knowledge that the Qlippoth was ensconced no more than a few Hundred Yards upstream from the Fleet Ditch we resolved to enter the Waterway and follow it till we encountered our Quarry. It was at this Point we were joined by Milord Foppingham, freed from his prior Engagement. Thus reinforced in both Body and Spirit we entered the dark Watercourse.

We waded upstream until we could see Light filtering down from above. It was there, where the Watercourse widened and deepened into the Pool that served the Denizens of the Parish of St Andrew’s as a Well, we encountered the Behemoth of the First Creation. The Waters before us roiled and we were of a sudden assaulted by a Band of ill-assorted Creatures, each the Avatar of some recently absorbed Victim of the Qlippoth. Amongst them was Sanderstead, come to the just Reward for his Stupidity and Greed. But there were others, innocent Victims consumed by this Evil as they pursued their rightful Business: a small Boy – some grieving Mother’s Son; a courting Couple – too distracted by their Passion to recognise the more deadly consuming Power that stalked them; Animals – a Dog and a Pig – perhaps indicating the lean Times the Qlippoth had come upon of late.

Whatever their Form, each was possessed of the terrible consuming Strength of the Qlippoth. Fortunately, we had bethought ourselves to ensure that we were each armed with Weapons that would bite upon the Spawn of the First Creation. Though cruelly beset, we contrived with many a stout Blow and well-aimed Shot to gain the upper Hand and dispatch each one of the Avatars.

However, the Struggle had gone hard with the Baron and I realised that he had been all but overcome by the Qlippoth and was like to become its next Victim. Seeing that some drastic Action was required, I whipped off the Baron’s wig and carved with my pen-knife upon his shaven Pate, an ancient Symbol for Man. His Humanity thus reinforced, he was able to summon the inner Resource to repel the Qlippoth’s final desperate Advance. Robbed of its final Prospect for Sustenance the Monster expired.

Mindful of his Duty as the investigating Magistrate, Foppingham set his servant, Godwin, to work on dredging the Pool, now returning to its accustomed Foulness. Some small Evidence of the Lives of its Victims was brought forth – particularly the Couple – as well as a Quantity of Gravel, which I was quick to identify as the numerous Teeth of the Qlippoth. These I find to make an excellent Charge for a Blunderbuss when there is a need to ensure efficacy against unnatural Beasts that might resist a more traditional Delivery.

We returned to Kent’s to perform our Ablutions and celebrate another Effectual Redress. There we encountered Captain Uffingham, who had been unfortunately detained and had thus missed our Adventure. As we recounted our Tale to him we were approached by a Society Member [Mr Blackness ] in response to our earlier Enquiries regarding Charles Templar. He made us aware of a Charles Martin, known to be an Enthusiast for recreating a Temple of Jerusalem (no doubt some Gentile Phantasy born of Ignorance and Misunderstanding) in London. Further Report would be nugatory since Captain Uffingham’s excellent Account of what ensued is already in the Society’s Archives.

Thursday, 18 November, 1736.

The Prince and Princess of Wales having on the Lord-Mayor’s-Day, when they were in Cheapside been pleased to visit Sadler’s-Hall, and accept a Glass of Wine, and permit the Company to kiss their Hands, and his Royal Highness to salute the Ladies there — The Court of Assistants of the Worshipful Company waited on their Royal Highnesses this Day at St. James’s to return their humble Thanks, and desiring his Royal Highness to accept the Freedom of the Company in a Gold Box, and permit them to have his Picture and her Royal Highnesses ; their request was granted, and they had the Honour to kiss their Hands.

Friday, 19 November, 1736.

Her Royal Highness was born early in the Morning of Nov. 30, 1719, N S. which answering to our 19th, it was observed with ringing of Bells, &c. and their Royal Highnesses received the Compliments of the Nobility at St. James’s.

Saturday, 27 November, 1736.

Sir Charles Wager embarked in order to sail with the Men of War under his Command to convoy his Majesty from Holland in his Return from Hanover.

Four Months Provision was order’d to our Fleet at Lisbon.

Society Transactions Nº 209, November, 1736

A Notification of recent Improvements by Baron Albrecht von Stoβenknopf.

To Skin a Cat

It is hoped that the Society will forgive this late Account of workings and preparations undertaken during the Month of October during which I was confined to my Laboratory. This was due to an unfortunate Experience during the location of Mr Kelly Pointer in late September, ably reported at the time by Mr ben Ezra among Others.

The Period of Confinement allowed, however, three significant Things to be acheived. The First of which was bringing into my Employ Leopold and Augustus Westphal, a Pair of able Men both capable as Help around the Laboratory as well as in the City. Given my inability to venture forth without causing a Stir, they proved invaluable in bringing me Provisions and Equipment needed to sustain my Researches.

The Brothers Westphal hail from my native Tübingen and are loyal to my own Family since their Mother and Father were killed in the Central Württemberg Potato Poisoning outbreak of 1728. An unfortunate Consequence of the popular Tuber Fayre of that Region in which Tubers of dubious Provenance were introduced into the Diet without regard for their Distance from other Members of the Nightshade Family. I only mention it here in Case you happen to be discussing this unfortunate Incident in your daily Conversation, to be considerate to the Brothers who are still pained by their Loss.

Indeed the Brothers were kept busy with the moving of my Household to Chelsea. Here the improved Access to London, ample Grounds for improvement and relative removal from Public Areas (being as it is not far from the Water Works) will enable me to pursue larger Experiments without being disturbed.

The Last of the Achievements was perhaps the most fruitful, for I finally managed to overcome the Last of the Difficulties with the Mechanical Cat Device that I unveiled to the Society in the Summer. In particular the articulation of the Hip Joints and the ambulation process is now all fixed so that the Creation’s Motion is most fluid and natural. I have to say that apart from its dull brass Appearance, the Mechanical Cat is most pleasing and lifelike in both Motion and Form.

Some Visits to Mr James Gardner, Tanner of Repute, secured several Pelts flexible enough to be used as coverings for the brass Construct such that the Cat passes for a live one unless one looks closely at it. While near Fleet Street I visited Mrs. Salmon’s Exhibition of Historical Tableaux and Horrific Scenes in Wax where I was impressed with the likeness of many of the Persons and Animals portrayed therein. I am sure that Members of the Society will be able to provide some Thoughts as how to improve this beyond my immediate Sphere of Knowledge.

Tuesday, 30 November, 1736.

Forty thousand Hogsheads of Pilchards were taken since Michaelmas last at Penzance in Cornwall  ; they sold for half a Moidore per Hogshead, besides the King’s Bounty, which is 7s. per Hogshead.

A great Number of Distillers, Chimists, Apothecaries, and Alehouse-keepers were convicted since our last, of selling Spiritous Liquors by Retail and fined 100 l. each ; and many Persons committed to Prison for selling such Liquors in the Streets, not being able to pay 10 l.

Dr. Rudd, a dissenting Teacher, who was try’d for selling half a Pint of a reddish Liquor call’d Cholick Water, produced his Diploma as a Physician, but it not being from Geneva (said a Punster) he was forced to pay 100 l.

In Scotland where Aqua Vitæ is allow’d, they have strictly prosecuted such as have been detected in selling foreign Spirits, hoping thereby to keep the Money from going out of the Nation.

December 1736

Saturday, 4 December 1736.

Came on a Hearing before Richard Pottenger and John Watts, Esqrs. two of his Majesty’s Justices of the Peace for the County of Berks, on an Information exhibited by the Collectors of the Excise, against Thomas Mersham, Peter Body, and Edward Turner, for double Duty on Made Wines, under the Denomination of Sweets, the whole Sum amounting to 558 l. 2 s. This Matter was learnedly argued by by Counsel in both Sides, Councellor Hammet on the Crown Side and Councellor Key on the Defendant’s, and after two Hours Debate upon several Acts of Parliament relating to the Excise, the said Justices upon the Proof before them, gave their Opinion that Made Wines could not be brought under the Denomination of Sweets ; and therefore were not liable to the said double Duty.

Society Transactions Nº 213, 6 December, 1736.

A Report by Captain Uffingham

More Bull

Once More Beneath London — To The White City of The Bull — Threats and Warnings

December and although the Sky is clear, the Cold nips to the Marrow. Kent’s Brews provide some Solace, but the bitter Wind waits outside the Door.

The Investigations into the Foreman Tho. Stothard are brought to a premature closure by the arrival of a Lawyer, bearing a Writ of Habeus Corpus in the name of one Edward Crane, signed by Justice Highfield. Mr ben Ezra can no doubt recount the Details he managed to extract from the Rogue afore he was spirited away.

We are brought News of Strange Reports at the Elder Distillery, with the aforementioned Edward Crane apparently suing Lord F— for damage to his Property whilst under m’Lord’s Seal. We determine to investigate.

We choose the LORD’s Day; if we are to face the Denizens of the underworld at least let it be on a hallow’d Day. ben Ezra appoints us with Charms and we set forth for the Ditch Ale Brewery now adorned with a sign declaring it to be the source of “Lord Foppingham’s Favourite”. Entering the Establishment, and armed with m’Lord’s Letter, we break the Seals and enter the Tunnels beneath our Great City. In this Endeavour there are three of us; I am fortunate to be accompanied by both Mr ben Ezra and the eminent Freiherr Doktorphilosophischundmechanisch Albrecht von Stoβenknopf. In addition, the good Doctor has brought along a fine looking Spaniel. I pride myself on a keen Eye, but it requires the Doctor to point out that the Creature is indeed a Construct, devised by the Baron and infused with a Spirit. The Doctor names the Creation as Blitz ; through I attempt to convince him that Blitzen may be more appropriate, later Events will shew that the good Doctor had the measure of his Device.

We travel through the Tunnels, at our first Point, we discover a great Store of Powder, arranged by a Tunnel with the clear aim of bringing it down. There are no Fuses so we deem it safe for the Time and press on. Beneath the Elder ’Stillery, the Tunnel we used to enter has also been blown. I judge it a professional Piece of Work. ben Ezra is keen to look further, so we begin a long Walk through the Underworld, scrambling past the Detritus of the Explosion and pressing on. Some way on we find another ‘true and proper’ Passage, shewing the Signs we are learning to recognise; past here, a locked Gate with a Staircase leading upwards from which ben Ezra elicits Emotions of Death, Doom and Despair. Finally, a Landing Stage, with three locked Gates each bearing the King’s sign. We deduce we are now close to the Thames and having completed this Sojourn, retrace our Step back to the mined Tunnel.

Leaving the Powder, we follow the Tunnel for some way to a Gate; Steps past here lead up and we emerge into A London. I say A London, Gentlemen, advisedly, for this Place is not the London I know and love. ben Ezra declares we are at the Haunted Tabernacle, and all around us gleams White Sandstone. We are in the Graveyard of this Building; as we move around my Companions tell me that I am attacked by some Form of Shadow Wolf, which must have slipped past my Artilleryman’s Eye. Certainly, when I look, I can see no Sign of a Beast. At this Stage, I am tempted to Discount their Words, but Prudence keeps me Silent.

In the Distance, an Analogue of our own Great St Paul’s and we set off to travel there. ben Ezra cast a Charm on us and we set off. The White City is indeed a Wonder. The Architecture has the clean lines and Proportions that Delight the Eye; but the Place is Sterile and devoid of Life. The Wind still blows Cold and it stirs Dust in empty Streets. As we approach the gleaming Golden Dome of this St Paul’s ben Ezra and The Baron note that we are being followed (I can only deduce that I was so taken by the Sights of the Place as a Reason for my failing to notice the Creatures) ; Gaunt Horrors, more Skeleton than Man are tracking us ; we essay an Experiment and determine that ben Ezra’s charm is indeed efficacious ; the Ghouls can smell us, but are following Blitz. The Baron sets his Mechanical Ally to lead the loathsome Creatures away – indeed to run like Lightening.

At this Point ben Ezra and The Baron note the Cry of Wolves in the distance; sadly, of my Senses, Hearing is that which most suffers from my Profession ; fortunate is the Man with such perspicacious Friends. We reach the Great Dome and enter the Building. The pattern of Sterility and Art continues ; deep inside the building is a Golden Statue of a Calf. ben Ezra notes watchfulness and informs us that the Dome itself is watching us. However, I surveyed the Dome and saw no Eyes therein. Nevertheless, Mr ben Ezra is attuned to these Things, so we exeunt.

Hearing a Commotion, I hasten to the Corner where I see the unfortunate Blitz has been overtaken by three of the Ghouls who are skinning the Beast. Even knowing the Provenance of the Creature, the sight of these Abomination tearing at the Hide is sickening and I raise a Pistol to intervene ; yet behind the scene I now see two Wolves approaching at speed. ben Ezra is greatly Alarmed, and calls us to his Side, beseeching us to grasp his Wrists. We do so as four Wolves bear down on us, yet a Second later, we find ourselves transported into the Realm of Hod. We rest here briefly ; then return by Magikal Means to the Hubbub of London.

For many Men that would be enough, but my Companions are made of sterner Stuff and soon after we are back in the Tunnel, checking that we have left no Trace of our entrance to this fabulous Realm. Having taken care of this Business, we are surprised by the approach of Troopers and Lights. We withdraw as a Body of Grenadiers arrives and begins making the final Preparations to destroy the Tunnel. We leave them to their Work and indeed some Time later the Destruction of the Tunnel reverberates.

Both the Baron and ben Ezra wish to check that an alternate Entrance to the White City remains open, so we visit the Haunted Tabernacle in our London ; a desolate Place where I am again visited by a Shadow Wolf; one that I see, though only briefly as the Creature vanishes like Mist before my Eyes. As we debate a Course of Action, a Woman appears. Identifying herself only as Alice, she begins a Line of Questioning which is, frankly, Hostile and Belligerent and not in a Manner which I believe an Englishman should be forced to suffer in his own Land. Revealed as a Werewolf, the Woman continues to Threaten and Cajole ; ben Ezra seeks to mollify the Beast and I bow to his approach. She speaks ill of Masons and those she considers ‘ignorant’ who seek ‘Power Through Perfection’ ; as the self-appointed Guardian of this White Realm she clearly believes that her Judgement is better than that of an Englishman. Despite this evidence of Delusion, Mr ben Ezra offers that the Beast is a Source of useful Information and so we humour her ; though I feel that we leave with no Material Gain, Conflict has been avoided.

Once more, gentle Men and Ladies, there remain Mysteries to Investigate.
  I remain your Servant,
    God Save England,
      Tristan Uffingham

Tuesday, 7 December, 1736.

Came on before the Lord Hardwicke the Tryal of Robert Nixon, a Nonjuring Clergyman, for being the Author, Printer and Publisher of a most scandalous and insolent Libel dispers’d in Westminster-Hall, July 14. and those of the like nature that were blown up with Gunpowder, with the Five Acts of Parliament on the smae Day. It was prov’d that he was the Author : That the printed Libel was composed from a Copy of his own Hand-writing, That it was printed in his own Room, That he gave out several of them to be dispers’d : That he laid the Parcel with Gunpowder in it himself near the Courts of Chancery and King’s-bench. Making no Defence, he was found Guilty of the whole Indictment. — Sentence was deferr’d till next Term.

Society Transactions 214, 8 December, 1736

A Report by Freiherr Doktorphilosophischundmechanisch Albrecht von Stoβenknopf.

The White City

In the last few Days of November I had chance to engage the Jew in a seriously profitable Conversation over a notably bland Coffee in Kent’s. I had made some Demonstrations of the Mechanical Cat to various and sundry Society Members who found it generally of interest. The main Lack was much of an Ability to be controlled beyond my Ability to anticipate some rudimentary directioning and timing of its Movement. It was at this Point that Solomon provided the Suggestion of imbuing it with a Spirit, and in fact he had such a captive Spirit at his disposal, that of a Dog.

After some further Refreshments and Discussions, including a Visit to Mrs Venables’ Establishment, I retired to my Laboratory and spent three Days disassembling the Cat. With some careful extending, a slight Change in the skeletal Frame and most notably a re-working of the Head, the Mechanical Dog was engineered. The disappearance of several similarly-sized Dogs from the Area, and subsequent visitations to Gardner’s Tannery are purely coincidental, I can assure Members.

On the Wednesday, the first Day of December, I visited upon the Jew at his Residence across Town. A well enough appointed Place, though rather too downwind of the general Stench of London for my liking. Thereupon we gathered in one of his prepared Rooms specifically arranged for the conducting of Sephirotic dealings. I was impressed with the Skill shown by ben Ezra in his handling of the Dog-Spirit and its control. I also was thankful for his Guidance in the Matters of Tipharet Rituals during which he did almost all of the Work leaving me to finally imbue the mechanical Construct with the Dog Spirit. The process was so adeptly handled that this binding should last many Months. Finally a disguising was placed upon the Device so that even without its animal Skin it looked to be a normal Hound to those who were not aware of it. I have named him “Blitz ”.

A Day or so later while meeting to discuss recent Effectual Redresses, ben Ezra recounted a Discourse with Mr Tho. Stothard, the Chief of the Ditch Ale Distillery mentioned in previous Accounts who was being held at Lord Foppingham’s Pleasure. We learned that attacked had been made upon the Stills and Efforts made to defend them. A Contingent of Men sent into the Tunnels (whence we had been investigating recently) had failed to return while looking for “true Stone” with which to “rebuild the Temple” — a Reference to that Edifice that Mr Charles Martin is currently engaged upon. Mentions of “Devil Dogs watching over the White City” also stick in the Mind, but at the Time appear to have little significance.

It is with no little annoyance that at some Point Mr Stothard is released on the Order of Justice John Hyfield in the Name of Edward Crane, one known in distillery Business, and in Fact currently has a Suit with Lord F— for Damages to his Buildings as they were sealed under Foppingham’s Name.

So it was that on the following Sunday, when most Men of London slumbered, that Cpt. Uffingham, ben Ezra and myself with Blitz in tow, made an early Visitation to Kent’s. Fortified with strong Brews, we sally on to the Ditch Ale Brewery itself and, with a Writ, enter the Well Shaft which has been secured and barricaded. The Tunnel with protective Markings previously noted was now lined with Barrels of Navy-issue Gunpowder. Thankfully these were without detonation Devices which the Captain, being knowledgeable in these Matters, informed us, that the Gunpowder was in little Danger of exploding.

Never being ones to rush in to a Situation more than three Times in any Week, we explore further the main Tunnel with a small River flowing along it. By our reckoning we head near Aldgate and thence arrive at the Tower itself proclaimed by Gratings with Royal Seals upon them. It is little surprise that they are recently used and are surely the Route by which the Gunpowder was transported. With that in Mind, we retrace our Steps to the first Tunnel and pass the Barrels safely.

The Warding against Dark Beasts inscribed to prevent them coming from our Destination provides some Interest as we cautiously test whether we can pass freely through it and back. While the Jew and I are unimpeded, Blitz seems to have to push through. The Captain, however, falls flat on his Face while wearing his Armour, but can pass freely when he removes it. We press on, knowing that this may be the least of our Difficulties, to a Door wedged shut from our Side.

Cpt U— has little difficulty opening this Doorway and I send Blitz inside to investigate with Instructions to return within a given Timeframe and report back on Anything moving and what he sees. A short While later he returns and conveys that there were some Figures seen in mostly empty Streets who attempted to interact with him, but did not interfere in his Actions. Satisfied that there was no immediate Danger, we moved through the Doorway led by the armoured Captain and up Steps emerging from an Sepulchre into a Yard filled with pale Sandstone Blocks, sharp-edged and obviously ready for use.

For those of us that had been previously here, it was now recognisable as the Haunted Tabernacle at St Andrew’s which we had cause to visit in April of this very Year. This was the “builders Yard” that we could see through the locked Gates adjoining the Church. The whole Area is washed out and pale, and the Jew remarks that even with his special Eye-glasses the surrounds are no more than a white-ish Field with blurry Splodges.

We start to explore the Area, moving down Streets strangely empty though Similar to those of the London we know. But again not like them. We walk towards St Paul’s appearing even grander in an Avenue of plain white Edifices, Buildings and Statues. We pass the Goldsmiths Hall protected by bearded, man-headed, lion-bodied Statues. Streets seemingly radiating from it in a fashion not as we know in the London we left behind.

At this Point we become aware that we are being followed. Stick-thin pale Humans, almost skeletal, some armed with iron Bars, appear to be chasing Blitz and are mostly oblivious to us. I send him off to lead them a merry Chase around the obvious Blocks of Streets as we pass Cripplegate and finally arrive at an enhanced St Paul’s. Again the Building is plain, flat, and seems incomplete. A Golden Bull Calf stands where the Altar should be and the Jew is sure that we are being watched from somewhere high up in the Dome, perhaps by the Dome itself!

We are disturbed by approaching Howls and outside we witness Blitz being caught by the skeletal Figures who rip the Fur covering from his Frame and attempt to devour it in their starving Madness. The brass Dog returns safely but with howling Wolf shapes in fast pursuit. They ignore the skeletal Figures and head at us from several Directions as we retreat into the Entrance of the Church. With these “Devil Dogs” almost upon us in this “White City”, we join with ben Ezra to be pulled out of this Realm back to the safety of his Lodging.

Finding that it late Evening, we await until Monday to once more gain access to the Distillery in order to close the unwedged Doorway that we left ajar. Luckily we exit the Tunnel quickly enough to avoid a Troop of Grenadiers who arrive and set about fusing the Gunpowder.

With Talk of Masonic Links to extreme Protestantism and thus the Golden Calf we pay a visit once more to the Graveyard of St Andrew’s whereupon we are met by the Figure of Alice Hardgrave, Leader of the Werewolves. Alice charms us with an offer to rip our Throats out as she does not like People doing excursions of scientific Interest in her Areas. She tells us that she and her Kind ate the ones who made the Openings, or most of them, referring to the Masons. Perhaps those who were not eaten were the starving skeletal Figures we saw, trapped inside that Realm?

Alice reveals that the Masons “seek what she guards” because they are mortal Men and fools who seek Power through Perfection. The ironic Thing is that she doesn’t guard it, but none-the-less the Masons think she does. We tell her that the Portal into the Tunnels has been closed by Soldiers, and she wants us to wall up the other Entrances too, like the one we used to visit the Graveyard, as we promised we would do before. But she thinks we didn’t because they are too convenient to have open for our own uses. On that thorny Issue we retire from the Scene knowing that the uneasy Relationship is only maintained due to the sharing of a mutual Enemy.

Of course, my Mind has already wandered off in to working out how to make Blitz bark…

Monday, 13 December, 1736.

At Sessions at the Old Baily 11 Criminals receiv’d Sentence of Death, (viz.) Cockey Wager, Edward Baker, George Sutton, Robert Campbell, and Gilbert Truer for Highway-Robberies ; Phyllis Fratter for stealing Goods from Mr Ryder  ; Jane Cooper for the Muder of her Bastard Child ; Katherine Pollard for stealing some of his Majest’s Plate ; David Jenkins and Tho. Stafford for stealing Money out of a Till ; and Peter Cross for Horse-stealing, 54 cast for Transportation, 5 burnt in the Hand, 54 acquitted.

Thursday, 16 December, 1736.

Was heard before the Commissioners of Excise a Complaint of Mr Alderman Parsons, upon the Over-charge of the Officer of Excise, upon a Guile of Beer which the Officer had charged as strong. — The Quality of the Beer as prov’d by the Witnesses, was 10 s. a Barrel ; on which Judgement was given against Mr Parsons, and it was notified to the Court, that all Beer brew’d for Sale, and sold for above 7 s. and 6 d. a Barrel, or at that Price, was liable to pay the Duty of 5 s. per Barrel.

Friday, 17 December, 1736.

The Right Hon. Sir John Thompson Knt. Lord Mayor, with the Aldermen, Sheriffs, & c. waited on his Royal Highness the Prince of Wales with the Freedom of the City of London in a Gold Box of 200 l. value. The Box was 10 Inches long and 6 broad ; the Arms of the City engraven on the Top, and enclosed in a Shagreen Case ; Within it was the Copy of his Royal Highness’s Freedom, wrote in Gold Letters on Vellum ; on the Top was painted the City Arms, and at each Corner a Plume of Feathers. All the Company were entertained at Dinner at his Royal Highness’s House Pall Mall.

The Recorder’s speech on presenting the Box.

May it please your Royal Highness,
“T H E Lord Mayor and Court of Alderman of the City of London most humbly beseech your Royal Highness, that you would be pleased to vouchsafe your gracious Acceptance of the Freedom of the City.
Your Royal Highness condescending to this humble Request, will yield Honour to that whole Body, and every Member of it. And they beg leave to take this Opportunity of assuring your Royal Highness of their dutiful and affectionate Regard, and their hearty Wishes of your Royal Highness’s Health, Welfare, and Prosperity.”

His Royal Highness’s Answer.

My Lord and Gentlemen,
“T H O’ no Ties were wanting to make you dearer to me, yet I receive this as a new Mark of your Duty and Loyalty to the King, and of your Affection to me. I am very thankful for your good Opinion, and shall try in all Times to deserve it, by my hearty Wishes for the Welfare of your Trade, and my constant Zeal for the Liberty of my Country.”

Monday, 20 December, 1736.

His Majesty leaving Hanover the 7th, arriv’d at Helveotsluys the 10th of this Month, and having waited till this Day for a Wind, ventur’d to sail with his Yatchts and Ships of War. They were got within 10 Leagues of the British shore, when a strong Wind rising in the West drove them back, but tho’ they separated for some time most of them got into Helveotsluys on Tuesday night, though with great difficulty ;  his Majesty was 20 Hours in the Storm ;  the Flubb’s Yatch, and the Eltham Man of War were much damaged.

Wednesday, 22 December, 1736.

A Lady passing Kent-street in her Chariot towards the Borough, dressed in a Robe de Chambre, the People gave out she was a certain Woman of Quality fom an Electorate in Germany, whereupon a great Mob follow’d and bestow’d on her many bitter Reproaches, till Madam perceiving some Mistake, look’d out and accosted them in this familiar Manner,
D—n your Bloods, don’t you know me !  I am Mrs Mapp the Bone-Setter. Upon which they suddenly chang’d their Reveilings into loud Huzza’s.

Friday, 24 December, 1736.

This Morning at 5 by a very high Tide, the Thames flowed into Westminster-Hall, broke down the Bank above the Horse-ferry, and did great Damage in the Gardens, Meadows, and Cellars thereabouts. In the Afternoon it was High Water again at two o’Clock, being at London Bridge 2 hours sooner than usual. A Breach was made a little below the old one near Dagenham, in Essex, and great Tracts of Land laid under Water.

Sunday, 26 December, 1736.

The Court and the Royal Family being under great Concern since the 24th, on hearing that his Majesty was at Sea in a great Storm ;  a Messenger who came to the Queen this Day while at Chapel with an Account of his Majesty’s being safe again at Helveotsluys, was so acceptable, that he was order’d 50 Guineas.